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| Hello. I'm Marauder Stanston with the 9 o clock news. | |
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| And I'm anchorwoman Selena F. Dogvomit | |
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| Top stories tonight: Anal Sex is LEGAL in most states, and Bush is a fucking moron. Oh, sorry. I guess that gives you some liberal media, just to even things out. | |
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| Now to our weatherperson, Mac. | |
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| I LIKE BEANS!!!! I REALLY REALLY LIKE BEANS!!!! and hail. | |
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