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| Make it stop! Make it stop! Make it stop! Make it STOP! | |
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| Why are you making those whimpering noises? | |
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| Don't you hear them late at night? Squealing? Scratching? Clinking empty glasses? Scratching away at the thin insulation and flimsy boards separating us from the ravening horror within? | |
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| The raccoons having wild sex in your closet again? | |
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| Don't say the 'R' word! You said the 'R' word! Oh, the HORROR! The HORROR! | |
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| While I despise your need for antipsychotic medications, nevertheless I will attempt to rid you of this overpowering menace. | |
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