All comics by qwertypod

Profile

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
Touch me and you die
...
Why did you touch him?
Well, I didn't think he was actually serious

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
* Knock knock *
Who's there?
Jake
Jake who?
Just open the frickin' door you idiot!

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
Hey NesQuik guy!
Yah?
I just won the lotto!
Really!?
Yah!
Share the wealth man

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
It's two dollars for a slurpie
K...
But if you give me five you will be met in heaven by 21 virgins

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
Hey Robot Jake!
Yah?
What ever happened to Robot Jones?
Iunno...
Eh, screw him

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
John, I think we should see other people
Why!?
Because you're gay, John
Well what does that have to do with anything!?

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
You know, "Katie", I've been wondering...
What?
Why do you look like a man?
What!?
You heard me
Err...I'm half Russian

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
A Nerd's Perfect Date
r0xxorz!!1!
i <3 you
do secksay?
w00t!

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
Good evening. We are here today to honor those valiant men and women that are going into war
Now some of you will die, the rest of you will most likely be molested
After all, this is the French we're dealing with

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
The Adventures of Spontaneous Man!
...
...
apple

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
Run! It's Godzilla!
All I ever want is a Happy Meal and this is what I get...

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
Just to let you know, I'm running out of ideas
...
apple

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
Where is my cell phone?
Iunno, look under there
Under where?
* snicker *

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
Where are you Blaine?
Over here Mom!
Thank God you're okay. I thought I'd lost you
You mean you WISH you had lost me

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
Do you want to experience the most degrading thing in the world?
...

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
I'm worried John
Why is that, honey?
I think we waited a little too long to give Grandpa the "sex talk". He had a heart attack when I finally told him
Wha...?All these years...could've...sex...haven't ever...what?...still virgin...80 years...

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
And then I humped the goat, even after I knew my mom was watching, and then...
...
A Good Story is Always Better When Told Over a Cold Millers Lite
Where're you goin'?

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
Didn't the apocalypse come a little early?...How did this happen anyway?
Oh yeah, I remember
Flashback:
This is going to be the best Fourth of July ever!

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
And WHERE did you say you were when this happened?
Ummm...
Come with me, sir

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
Mommy! Help! I'm being kidnapped!
Daughter! Help! I'm being mugged!
New York: A Place Where Your Family Can Really Interact

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
What do you call a southerner with the hiccups?
* drumroll *
A HICK-up!

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
What do you call an ant when it's high?
* drumroll *
BUGin-out!

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
What's a gay way to get around?
* drumroll *
Riding a BI-cycle!

 

by qwertypod
7-01-03
What do you call a mosquito that's been feasting on some guy's di...
Boo! You suck! Don't quit your day job! God forbid if you have the slightest sense of humor
Fine. I'll just o-PUN the exit door and kill my joke...err...I mean myself

 

by qwertypod
7-03-03
Arnold Schwarzenegger is back and better than ever in T3!
Better than ever?
Like THATS a hard thing to accomplish...

 

by qwertypod
7-03-03
The School System is Stricter than Ever
Remember kids, your homework is due today.
Johnny, can I see your license and presentation please?

 

by qwertypod
7-05-03
Lose 200 pounds in ten days! Just look how ChubChewer has affected this man's life:
...?
Why does the before picture look like Will Ferral and the after one like Jackie Chan?

 

by qwertypod
7-05-03
Oh! Oh! You're so hard Jorhn.
* shudder *
I'm not even safe watching Lizzie McGuire anymore...

 

by qwertypod
7-05-03
Next time on America's Most Wanted: Martha Stewart gets busted for decorative marijuana, but holds her own in a dangerous car chase!
And Gary Coleman gets busted for going on a roller coaster that he was not tall enough to ride!
Right...

 

by qwertypod
7-05-03
The Real Cause of Violence in America
Mommy! I'm bored!
You know, honey. When I was young we threw rocks at the local hippie for entertainment
...
Hehehe >: )
Whatcha got there little girl?

 

by qwertypod
7-05-03
It looks like the cat left us a little surprise on the front door for Christmas
Oh, not again! I'll go clean it up
Oh my God! It's a diamond ring!

 

by qwertypod
7-05-03
There's only one thing that I can do to make myself feel better about my current lack of insight.
And that's blame someone
Those stupid 7-11 bastards. Giving me brain freeze cabable of renduring any humorous thought useless.

 

by qwertypod
7-05-03
Daddy?
Yes?
What's the recipe for making babies?
You live in today's society and you don't already know this!?
You should watch some TV before you corrupt your mind further

 

by qwertypod
7-05-03
Daddy?
Yes?
How come sometimes you and mommy are under the covers making funny noises?
Well...
We like to play fortress, just like every other decent person in the world

 

by qwertypod
7-05-03
Daddy?
Yes?
How come people in France go to the beach naked?
God knows why, honey. I just hope a shark comes and bites their little crossiants off

 

by qwertypod
7-05-03
I'm hungry!
Oh stop whining! Right now, in China, there are hundreds of little children starving to death
Are you saying you care more about strangers in China than your own daughter!?

 

by qwertypod
7-05-03
Ahh, el_foka has some wise words for me. Let's see...
Out on a limb!?
But I'm afraid of heights

 

by qwertypod
7-06-03
Todays weather is: Hot, cold, windy, humid, sunny, rainy, and smoggy. All at the same time!
Yah know, sometimes I think that Mother Nature has left all logic behind
Either that, or Father Nature has been severily beating her...

 

by qwertypod
7-06-03
Mommy, sometimes when someone is lonely and has no friends I feel bad for them
Who do you feel bad for, honey?
Cy...
You mean the photoguy!?
Yah...
Oh, don't worry honey. No one cares about him. he is just some pathetic loser whom no one likes. Don't waste your emotions on him

 

by qwertypod
7-07-03
Oh dear. I've had the worst day today
Why is that, honey
While I was waiting some table at Red Lobster the costumer punched me in the face and took his food without paying
The bastard didn't even leave a tip!

 

by qwertypod
7-07-03
This just in: Kobe Bryant has been arrested!
Oh... I didn't know that...
This just in: Kobe Bryant is still in prison!
Okay then, I guess there just making sure everyone knows...
This just in: Kobe Bryant has has not yet escaped from prison, meaning he is still in prison!
Fool me once; shame on me. Fool me twice; shame on you. Fool me three times; I'm coming over there to kick your ass

 

by qwertypod
7-07-03
Wait!? You see a clue?
Yah! Right there! It's a clue!
Oh. A shoe. Yeah, I wear shoes
A shoe...?
Whaddya mean shoe!? I clearly said clue, you illiterate bastard!

 

by qwertypod
7-07-03
In Loving Memory of Charles Schultz
Charles Schultz?
That guy's got nothing on me
Well, except for everything...

 

by qwertypod
7-07-03
In Loving Memory of Charles Schultz
Charles Schultz?
That guy's got nothing on me
Well, except for everything...

 

by qwertypod
7-07-03
Honey! Have you seen my kilt? I'm supposed to go drinking and throwing logs with the guy's tonight

 

by qwertypod
7-09-03
You don't even know me mom! My life is so complicated. It's like a soap opera, with all the co...
Have you ever looked at a cookie and broke down crying?
Well no, not exac...
Then you're life is NOT like a soap opera!

 

by qwertypod
7-09-03
This strip must be from the sixeties
I mean, just look at the special effects

 

by qwertypod
7-11-03
Are you on "inappropriate" sites again, son?
No
Oh really...
STRIPcreator!? And what's all the about cornholing tobor!?

 

by qwertypod
7-15-03
Oh my god! I'm, like, sooo fat. I mean, size three!? I need to throw up
Why is everyone so worried about personal apearance? They should do what I do:
Wear a corset under your T-Shirt

 

by qwertypod
7-15-03
You know, I had a really great time tonight
Really?
Yah, your not like most guys. You didn't just stare at my ass the whole time
Yeah well, after years of playing "The Circle Game" as a child I've trained myself never to look lower than the waist

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