All comics by redtail1

 

by redtail1
1-14-03
Hey! Let me get the door for you.
Creep.
Chivalry is dead.

 

by redtail1
1-14-03
Ummm. Thank you nice people. (boy, that spotlight is hot...) I just wanna say that I... uh, I...
I don't feel so good...
*KLUNK*

 

by redtail1
1-14-03
Hey Phil, what are you doing?
Looking for some brew, man.
The TV just said that beer prices are falling. I'm hoping to catch some before it all hits the ground.
Just promise me you'll go inside when housing prices start to fall.
No problemo, dude.

 

by redtail1
1-14-03
Hiya Tops.
Mornin' Rex. *puff*
Damn ice age. It must suck being a smoker this time of year.
Nah. The fresh air is good for me.
Ah, irony...

 

by redtail1
1-14-03
Oh I am a man... of constant sorrow...
Use the microphone, please.
Who's that talkin' to me?
This is the director of the musical. I'm sitting down here in the audience. Please sing into the microphone.
The heck with singin'. I can play that Hamlet guy. To be or not...
NEXT.

 

by redtail1
1-15-03
Man, what an ugly phone...
He sees things only in black and white...

 

by redtail1
1-15-03
Okay Mr. President, the FBI's supercomputer is connected to the satellite video feed.
The artificial intelligence routines are now scanning the populace for crime and corruption.
Yes. It still needs some tweaking, sir.

 

by redtail1
1-15-03
Hey kid. What's this game supposed to be again?
PONG! Oh, never mind. *sigh*
Ooo, did somebody say Pac-Man?

 

by redtail1
1-15-03
Hello. It is my turn to be in this comic strip but I don't have a script.
This invitation only says, "All out of material. Tell a joke or something."
Well, I heard one once about a chicken...
Too late.

 

by redtail1
1-15-03
So this is your parents' bedroom.
Yup.
And their porno stash is in that box?
Yep. Hang on.
So how do they look?
Braille.

 

by redtail1
1-16-03
Are you the parking lot attendant?
No.

 

by redtail1
1-17-03
So anything I wish for will come true?
Dem's da rules. I'm just da genie.
Yeah, whatever...
One hour later...
Oh, I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Weiner...

 

by redtail1
1-17-03
Hey! You with the pencil!
Yes?
Why haven't I been in any of your comic strips?
Ummm. I dunno. I haven't decided what to do with you yet.
Great, another guy with committment issues.
I heard that. This pencil has another end, you know.

 

by redtail1
1-19-03
blah blah BLAH blah blah...
Let's get out of here. This place is too smoky.
blah blah BLAH blah blah...
Hi. How's it goin'?
Ewww. This guy reeks of smoke.

 

by redtail1
1-20-03
Hello, welcome to McDonalds.
One small order of fries, please.
Would you like to supersize that? You pay 20¢ more and it costs us only 2¢ to make.
Sure!
And in other news, scientists now say that all chairs will be twice their current size by the year 2050.
Wow, I wonder why?

 

by redtail1
1-23-03
Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
No crosswalk.

 

by redtail1
1-23-03
Welcome to Microsoft Spacecraft Simulator! Your ship is now departing from Moon Base Alpha.
I can't see where I'm going. Beat it, clippy!
You are now reentering Earth's atmosphere. Space is in the other direction. Do you need some assistance?
Arrrgh! Get out of the way, you damn paperclip!
Your score for this mission is 0. Do you want to play again?
No.

 

by redtail1
1-24-03
Here we are. Home sweet home.
So what do you do when you're not, umm...
Turning tricks? In the mornings I work as a secretary and during the afternoons I waitress.
Isn't it tiring having three jobs?
Nah, one of them is lying down.

 

by redtail1
1-31-03
*yawn* Ah, the sky looks beautiful this morning.
There's my nice neighbor. I wonder why he's grinning at me?
Oh. I'm not wearing pants.

 

by redtail1
2-19-03
Hey, there's free coffee in the kitchen! I think it's some new light decaf.
He's been here forever. What a fossil.
Have they finished bleaching the coffee pots this morning?
No, not yet.

 

by redtail1
7-10-03
hey! there's food in my bowl!
hey! there's my litter box!
That stuff goes right through you, doesn't it?

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