The Lord is: [OUT] by sc_demandred1-18-01 I swear, man, if one more person... Jesus! It's really you! That's it... Can you give me a blessing, Jesus? Please?? MUST... TIP... CROSS... OVER...
The Lord is: [nauseous] by sc_demandred1-18-01 "Jesus, will I ever get laid?" No... he'll see right through that. Bloody Romans... "Jesus, I would like to get my freak on with Catherine Zeta Jones. Can you hook it up?" No... too much. Oh, the pivoting cross is REAL funny, Maximus... "Hey, Jesus, what's your position on me and some hot monkey love?" I'll never get the puke out of my beard.
The Lord is: [hungry] by sc_demandred1-18-01 Jesus, I'm gonna kill myself! Dammit, they said three o'clock! I'm serious, I just can't take it anymore CENTURION! What's it take to get some fucking gruel up here?? ...gurgle.... Oh well, at least it's mostly quiet now.
The Lord is: Looking for a little alone time, if you please by sc_demandred1-18-01 I thought they'd never move me to solitary! All these goddamn people asking bless this, help me that... sheesh. Jesus, can you change this Paulaner into a Weihenstephaner? I thought crucufuxion was supposed to KILL PEOPLE, Maximus!!
The Lord is: Having problems at home by sc_demandred1-19-01 Alone at last... free to communicate with my Father. Father? Are you there? Can it wait, Son? I just put "Maul in the Family: Forbidden Incest Bondage Tales VI" into the DVD player. Do you really think I don't know why you had me nailed to this thing?
The Lord is: Down AND out. by sc_demandred1-19-01 Centurion wants to move you. I'm gonna have to cut your cross down. Oh, come on, just leave me in solitary! Sorry, orders. Please, man, every asshole and his brother wants me to heal his canker sore or bless his dog's tumor. Stop complaining, most everyone else is dead now anyway. You'd think being the son of God would count for someone somewhere, but nooo.
The Lord is: Low-key about his notoriety. by sc_demandred1-23-01 I guess this new place could be worse... At least the air is clean. There's only one problem... Hey, look everyone, it really IS Jesus! Fanboys in the freak section.