All comics by spng

 

by spng
3-19-07
Harr.. This be a great steal.
Yeah, but I´m a bit worried about us though.
What?
We designed the ship to selfdestruct when stealing other ships. What will happen to us?
Eh.. Stupid shipdesigners.
Harr. Stupid shipdesigners.

 

by spng
3-19-07
The Superninja kungfu monkey fleet has been launched, heading for 12:7:8, on a mission to Attack. Arrival tick: 1352
Cool Now I just need a scan.
The target planet is too well protected against scans, and you need more Wave Amplifiers to get through to this target.
oh man-...
1345 The Superninja kungfu monkey fleet heading for 12:7:8 has been recalled.
From: Mastermind (12:7:8) Hard time scanning me?

 

by spng
3-19-07
Hey, you are twice my size
Atleast.
And you would kick my ass easily
yeah.
Wow This should get me some nice xp.

 

by spng
3-19-07
Welcome to the 7.6.11 News-station..... -The construction team reports that Finance Center has been finished. They are standing by in the Construction area.
Good news.
Now ower to a related story. -It seems a group of 30 saboteurs caused havoc by planting heavy explosives in desolate areas..
...
Destroyed Structures: 1 Finance Centre. The alertness has been raised.
Damn.

 

by spng
3-19-07
How dare you attack my friend? I shall steal your ships-
And I shall steal yours, you filthy zikonian bastard.
Jer
Erh...

 

by spng
3-19-07
Prrrrr...
Oh man.
Prrrrr...
I should have known he´d spend his resources.
Prrrrr...
Damn cat

 

by spng
3-19-07
We are quite peacefull you know.
We broke out of the terran race due to theyre vicious fighting...
Why we still fight?
Well, we dont actually fight.
We just...
Suicide on other planets, to win the game.

 

by spng
3-19-07
Thank you for flying with Eitraides Experience Express...
... we are currently having some heavy turbulence due to hostile ships shooting at us, but do not worry...
...The pilot garantees a soft crash.

 

by spng
3-19-07
Why are TerranCorp Doing so bad?
We have some stiff competition, sir.
We have two companies in top 100, thats a new record low.
Yes, it looks really bad, I know, but we did our best and completely made our goals for this years products.
What goals?
We focused on making our products as slow, expensive and useless as possible, Sir.

 

by spng
3-19-07
Hey! What do you thin you are doing?
Creating a new race.
Another one? What? The Eitrades wasn´t enough?
We are planning to call it Harkonian.
Man... This smells like a cheesy Dune Ripoff.
Damn he´s on to us. Better wait till next round before we implement harwesters and sandworms...

 

by spng
3-19-07
I got mail from my target.
What does it say?
All your ships are belong to us.
Wow, thats like...
Yeah I know.
...extremly bad spelling.

 

by spng
3-19-07
What the...
All round and no roids Makes terran a dull boy...
Freeze!
Damn
That always works...

 

by spng
3-19-07
What a lovely birdcage.
Its not a birdcage you fool... Its a Xandathrii shipdock.
Xandathrii shipdock? You got to be kidding me.
Our ships may be small but our cloak is superior, and we fire fast with high damage. This Dock contains more then 100.000 ships.
So I better be carefull then?
Damn right!

 

by spng
3-19-07
Har har har... Cloak FTW!
What the.. ?
Precious AU-scan

 

by spng
3-19-07
Noone can see me, but everyone knows what I got. And its so easy to make me recall.
I can freeze most people, but since I do not kill them I always get incs.
I can steal ba, and attack almoust anyone. XP is my friend. But I cannot keep roids.
Harr. I am a bit confused about the dying stealers.
Oh man. I have slow useless expensive ships.
How can I possibly balance this out without creating a new race?

 

by spng
3-20-07
So this big Xan goes to a cheesy Terran bar. And at this bar, he meets a beutifull Zikonian. Long blond energyfields and perfectly ballanced dark matter. And the Xan goes like: "Hey baby...
Lead me to believe you checked up with this hot Zik.
.. wanna taste my roids?" They end up in his apartment and a hubba hubba ding dang dong... You know the drill. And it was the roiding of his lifetime. And the next day, the zik chick has split...
I know he never got any dark matter. It is so obvious.
So the Xan decides to take on a litle solomission, but he keeps on fumbling and slowly coming to tearms with the fact. She didnt just roid him good, she also stole his ship.
Oh... I guess he did get some dark matter.

 

by spng
3-29-07
Ahh... New round is about to start. beta-server is up, speedgame coming up soon, and signups have opened.
stats dont look to bad either. Hmm... So This zikonian scannerbuisness of mine for next round have to be planned out good, if its going to work.
Lets see. First I need a cool name with the words thief or steal in it...

 

by spng
3-29-07
Hi there, we are to close down this planet.
Why?
We have reason to believe this is a farm.
A farm. Oh but thats not true.
Can you explain then, why the same guy keeps stealing all your ships with no losses.
You are such a newb bobby. Thats not another guy, its just my second account.

 

by spng
3-29-07
owk now. Now would you please give me the user id of your other acount.
You just closed one of my accounts, why would I give you the information of the other one?
So we can close it to. But we allready know the id, I just want confirmation. Are your account registered to a certain Mark Slater?
No its not, so get lost.
oh..
1337killah has quit IRC (Quit: [01:18:35] Mark Slater PWNs Pa-n00blets

 

by spng
3-29-07
Hah. I so totally hate that bobby for closing my second account. Hate the n00b.
What the? How did you find me
Doesnt really matter does it? Well, since you failed to cooperate I will close this account for farming.
what the... You damn fool. Whats your coords? I will Pwn you with my third ehh... Nevermind. I´ll be off now.
hmm... That explains why this guy get fleetcought all the time.

 

by spng
3-29-07
So I am here to complain about you guys closing two of my accounts, I dont think its fair.
So on what grounds do you want to complaint?
Lack of evidence....
We have plenty of evidence, and actually we are to close your third account pretty soon.
Thats no fair, I worked hard with that account.
Cheating is not work, stoopid.

 

by spng
3-29-07
And the moral is....
...Do not cheat, play fair, and read the eula. And most of all..
...Big Bobby is watching...

 

by spng
6-19-07
You are not a community! You are way to small!
Ofcourse we are Xontas. We are barely a couple of thousand people with a thing in common.
Exactly! And only thoose playing from R1 deserve to call themself a part of it.
Yes. God forbid we actually try to be nice to new people. That would just make the "community" even smaller.
And you are all nerds. No decent people play this game.
Oh Xontas you are so smart, why dont we make you president of the world?

 

by spng
6-19-07
I apologise for the excessive use of irony in the last strip. I also want to apologise to Xontas if he feels targetted by me, or if he feels that I portrayed him like some kind of an idiot.
And I do wish to apologise for my excessive lying in the last panel.

 

by spng
6-19-07
Earlier in #planetarion
There is no morale here.
there is
Someone takes a stand for morale.
yeah. Dont say fuck
Spng was kicked by Pea ([1] :: No offensive language :: (Auto) Duration: 30m)
o dear

 

by spng
6-19-07
The morale is so twisted theese days.
In a conversation about morale, I simply say a word that describes the sexual act, and I get kicked from the discussion.
Its sick when kicking is more accepted than fucking...

 

by spng
6-19-07
After being R-rated in my past couple of strips, due to offensive and sexually explisit language...
I would like to inform you that a "airlineversion" of theese strips will be awaivable soon.
Where all the words that starts with "F" and ends with "uck", will be swapped with the more suitable word "Duck".

 

by spng
6-19-07
meanwhile the MPAA takes a look at
I know what you did last summer!
Oh noes. He gon be slappin me silly with his axes!
Screamallyoucan 7....
You can run but you cant hide!
Runsorz all me can.
Rated PG for mild peril
I´ll love to watch you squirl!
This gon be Murda Murda!

 

by spng
6-19-07
So now, thats out of the way. And if anyone wants to come ower to my place this weekend, for a duck.
You are welcome. There is nothing better than an oldfashion duck on the livingroom table.
omg. I have lost my sence of humor by trying to be funny...

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