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| I'm Happy Gilmore. I'm a hockey player. | |
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| I work for the IRS. I just repossesed your grandmother's house and all her belongings. | |
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| I've become a pro-golfer to buy back my grandmother's house. | |
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| I never used to date golfers, but thanks to Happy's insane behavior I've fallen in love with him! | |
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| Lucky for me Shooter turned out to be a pyscho and got chased off by that freaky guy! And I won the tournament and got back my grandmothers house! | |
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| Chubbs is still dead though. | |
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