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The Parable Of The Toaster Oven...
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| In a certain land there lived a certain man. He was not tall, nor wide. His nether regions were a bit itchy, but that fact has nothing to do with this story. | |
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| The man was a man who loved to watch things. He would watch snails screwing. He could watch paint dry. He would even watch his watch. | |
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| One day, the man was watching an egg boil. It was a hard-boiled egg, so it took a long time. | |
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| Just as the egg timer was about to go off, the boiling water disappeared, and the egg popped out of the pot. Steam escaped from the egg, and an egg sprite appeared. | |
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| The egg sprite said, "Behold, sir, today is your lucky day! Because you have freed me, I will give you my enchanted toaster oven." | |
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| "This oven makes perfect toast--every time--in two minutes. However, there is one catch..." | |
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