"Who needs her? I can take matters into my own hands."

Wow! They were right! Masturbating did make me go blind!

quote:

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Afghanistan's space program gets off to a rocky start.

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Soon after the researchers had taught Noodles the orangutan to use sign language, they discovered the poor thing had glaucoma when the first complete sentence he signed was: "I can't see a fucking thing."

COMING THIS CHRISTMAS: QUENTIN TARANTINO'S OEDIPUS REX!!!

As the children at the zoo looked on... Bobo motioned "When you do this, God cries."

Eventually, Koko tired of her kitten.

"I'll just cover my eyes... Good! Now I'll have some privacy."

Chim-chim was still able to make Pasta Roni with his other foot, thus proving himself to be the superior species.