"Raise your hand if you've got the world's crappiest foreign policy!"

Off-screen tutor: "We've been over this before Mr. President. Two plus two equals four. Four! say it with me..."

"Mr. President, I realize that it's fun to spank Laurie Dhue's pert, rounded buttocks while you're fucking her in the ass, but could you please answer the question about the economy?"

"Alright, Mr. President, in tens of millions, how many jobs have been lost? That's right! 5! 50,000,000 jobs lost! Very good!"

"Damn paparazzi!"

"He's using LOGIC! MUST SHIELD BRAIN"

"Condi? Can I go pee now? Please? I really gotta!"