Japanese researchers completed their research on sexual habits of giant lizard monsters today by concluding they prefer to do it "Gamera Style."

Adding insult to injury, the mighty Godzilla roars, "This is how your mother likes it!"

"Hey, you okay buddy?"
"Yeah, but those fucking telephone wires are a bitch!"
"Someone really needs to do something about them. A monster could hurt himself tripping on those things."

[theme music from "The People's Court"]

Gerard Damiano presents... "Behind The Green Dinosaur"