All comics by DragonXero

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by DragonXero
2-26-01
Crossovers will never be the same...
Damn, wish I could light this fart.
WHAT?!
We're not your bloody SLAVES!

 

by DragonXero
2-26-01
The aliens have abducted Tom, and are now planning to probe him!
Anal probe? Who do you think you are, my dad?
Way too much info bud.
I know, I'm sorry.

 

by DragonXero
2-26-01
The year: 2109
Hey Bill, now that the humans have been exterminated...
Yes?
Wanna link parallel ports?
DUDE! Sick!

 

by DragonXero
2-26-01
You're gonna eat me, aren't you?
Damn right, tin-boy.

 

by DragonXero
2-26-01
These comics are crap.
Quit yer bitchin' and stop breaking the fourth wall.
You really think our readers know what the "fourth wall" is?
You really think these comics are funny enough to warrant that question?

 

by DragonXero
2-26-01
Jesus educates the masses...
This Ritz cracker is my body, eat of it.
And this wine is my blood, drink of it.
It's not going well.
So, do you understand the scripture now?
Um, so, basically, you want me to eat you?

 

by DragonXero
2-26-01
Jesus has some problems...
So, what's the worst part of being crucified?
Well, I can't scratch my nuts. Can you help?
..............
Well?
You're not really Jesus, are you?
RESPECT MY AUTHORATAI!

 

by DragonXero
2-26-01
Jesus Tells a Joke
So I sez to the guy, "Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just here to praise me?" HAHAHAHAHA
Mind helping me out here?
Is there a doctor in the house?
Damn you! I mean it too!

 

by DragonXero
2-26-01
The cops are here, and I have a chicken. I need to hide it. I know! I'll shove it up my ass!
Honestly officer *ouch* I didn't have a chicken *ouch*.
Only one thing left to do... KILL MYSELF!
Dammit, I know there's a chicken up your ass!

 

by DragonXero
2-26-01
Hello! We are little asian girls!
We eat only rice! Isn't that right other little asian girl?
Other little asian girl?
Aw fuck. I think I'll start eating some meat from now on.

 

by DragonXero
2-26-01
Why hello little girl!
DON'T PATRONIZE ME YOU WHITE, MISOGYNIST MALE!
Holy FUCK! What the hell did I do?!
YOU WERE BORN WHITE AND MALE! YOU ARE NATURALLY RACIST AND SEXIST!
Moral: The cheeses are molding.
Isn't that kinda hypocritical?
QUIET, MISOGYNIST!

 

by DragonXero
2-26-01
Darling, don't ya know I love ya?
Go away you BASTARD!
Please! Stay with me!
NEVER!
John, you're a cheatin BASTARD!
Damn, News Radio's gone to HELL lately.

 

by DragonXero
2-26-01
And so, the neverending battle continues.
I'm Jesus!
No! I'm Jesus!
A new combatant enters!
I'm Jesus!
No! I'm Jesus!
And yes, all your bases ARE belong to Jesus H. Christ.
What in MY name was that?
Beats me. I'm still Jesus though.

 

by DragonXero
2-26-01
Another fine day in comic land!
I SAID, ANOTHER FINE DAY IN COMIC LAND!
THAT'S YOUR FUCKING CUE!
Says here we're supposed to do something.
Well, I'll be damned!

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
And NOW, Ladies and Gentlemen, Fred Durst and Britney Spears!
Mutha fuckah rollin rollin cuz I gotta have FAITH bitch!
Oh baby baby...
Oh my god!
AAAUUUGH!
MY TITS ARE MELTING!!!
Thank God for small miracles.
Yeah, you better be respectin' the man!

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
And now, ladies and Gentlemen, RED SKELTON!!
Hiya folks, I just flew in from miluakee and boy, is my sack tired.
Oh fuck. Close enough.
Take my dick, PLEASE!
And now for no apparent reason, JESUS!
HOLY FUCK!
Damn right! Now gimmie some holy lovin.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Computer Luvin'
Oh yeah baby, put that 1/16" plug into my drive!
Yeah baby, take all 3.5 inches of floppy disk!
Do me harder you big harwired piece of mac!
Oh god, give it to me you sexy IBM!
Damn I'm good.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Hi! I'm little asian girl one! This is little asian girl two!
Actually, I'm mexican.
YOU ARE ASIAN GIRL LIKE ME!
Bite me, who are you? God?
Damn right I am.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
I'm going to kill myself with this nail and hammer, I swear it!
Go ahead!
I MEAN IT, I REALLY WILL! I'LL USE THE KNIFE!
Do it, wussy.
What, you thought I would use the stupid "nail in the head" frame?
You hate me, don't you?
I knew you wouldn't. Wuss.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Hello there little asian girl!
I'M NOT A LITTLE GIRL!
Then what are you?
I'm a midget man!
You look like a little asian girl to me.
*sob* I know. I wish my face weren't glued into this stupid expression. *cry*

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Cthulhu ponders the death of the mortals in this yard of death.
Muahahahahahahaha...
...hahahahahahahahaha...
...haha *cough* *choke* *gag* *hack* Dammit...
Serves you right, asshole.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
adramolek, ladies and gentlemen!
Hello everyone! I'm adramolek, and I like to create crappy comics with no meaning or humor!
I hope you all suff- AUGH! IT'S HOT!!!
Sorry, this wasn't really funny at all. Just furstration.
AAAUUUGGHHH!!!
Yeah. Suffer, bitch.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Hey dude, like, my name is Chris. I stand for all sorta smart things!
Like what?
Like, getting George W Bush out of office, and stuff. I voted for Nader dude.
Why do you dislike Bush? Do you not realize Nader was an incompetent buffoon? I don't like any of the canidates, but do you even know WHY you dislike him?
Because, like, he kills trees and stuff dude.
Hrm. All your rolling papers are belong to us, then.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
*sniff* Dude! Gross!
What?? I didn't fart!
Hrm. Must be hazardous gas then. Yep. Surely hazardous gas.
....ngh....
Well, actually, it was a highly concentrated corrosive agent, sprayed into the room.
You okay man?
I will be as soon as I stop bleeding from my ears and eyes... OH GOD IT HURTS!

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
ONWARD WE MARCH!
YES, CHEESE!
*schweeeeeeeeee*
What??
What is that sound?
Bewm.
Oh, that? That's an incindiary bomb.
AAAAIIIIEEEE!! IT BURNS!! IT BURNS!!!

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Return of the dead infantry guy...
Heyyy! I'm what's left of that "flaming infantry troop" guy.
And y'all think I give a fuck why?
Hey, I died for your sins...
Nah, he did.
Jesus of Nazareth, ladies and gentlemen.
WHY THE FUCK DOESN'T THIS MAKE SENSE!?
Never does.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
I'M the original Moff!
No, I AM!
No you bastard, YOU'RE my clone!
You're going down boy.
To keep this from being a bloodfest, we've raised the camera up a bit... Enjoy!
I'M THE REAL ONE! *ouch*
NO, I AM, NOW SUFFER MY POWERS! KAMEAMEAH! *BLAST*

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Yeah! Iced Earth's "Reaping Stone". Been wanting to hear this for a while.
{downloading}
What the hell?
{Error: Connection closed by other side: Downloading}
ARRRGH! The guy is on a CABLE! Ass.
{Error: Connection closed by other side: ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US!}

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Yeah man. Dogma. Yeah. Rhetoric.
Yeah. Like, this coffee taste horrid and disgusting, I love it.
Yeah. Absolute crap man. Everything is crap. I can't do better, but everything is crap.
Yeah man, especially anything popular.
Yeah man. This coffee is really hot.
GAAAH! IT'S HOT! I FEEL LIKE I'M ABOUT TO BURST INTO A HUGE FIREBALL! Or not. Anyway. There's lotsa beats like us who hate.. popular... stuff... DOH!

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Jennifer reveals her secret!
Carrie... I... I LOVE YOU!
*schlorp*
Take me NOW you beautiful.. erm... squid face...
*schlorp*
And Carrie reveals her.. erm... secret... ew...
*schlorp* Yum.
Dammit! Why'd you go and EAT my ass?

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Heya Skulhedface. What you doing?
Gonna kill him... gonna cut his face up...
What you doin' with that.. hammer... umm... gonna.. hammer a nail into your head? Heh.. heh... funny, right?!
Eet... eet... FACES...
Never dress in loincloths kids. Just, don't.
AAAUUGH! THIS HURTS, LEMME DOWN! I'M NOT FUCKIN JESUS!!
Hehe... I think I'll go torture Bill Murray now.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Jesus, what the HELL am I doing here?
What the HELL do you think?
Um, floating around, realizing the irony of saying "hell" while I'm here?
DAMN right!
Sure he could make a buncha fish and booze and shit, but Jesus could NEVER figure out when the HELL to kill a joke.
Jesus... It got old a long time ago...
Go to HELL!. Hahahahaha...

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
So, what you wanna do bro?
I WANT TO RISE UP AND DESTROY THE HUMANS!
I dunno if that would be such a good idea Mikey.
WEAKLING, YOUR SHELL IS LIKE HUMAN FLESH!
By they way, you left this recipt for the strip bar down on 4th street... the *human* strip bar.
I, ERM.... I WAS STUDYING ANATOMY!

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Is this reality, or just a dream?
Is truth really truth, or just our perception?
Is God dead?
Is anything we say ever going to matter?
Is that a quarter?
Where? OOH! Shiney!

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Y'know, there's something about this place that reminds me of comic chat.
... PWETTY COLORZ?
No... Comic chat doesn't have that...
YOU'RE A DUMB-HEAD!
Ah, yes, that's it... the idiots!
I like pwetty colors...

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Amateur night with Dragon Xero and Sheph
You know the night time...
WAA DOO DAY!
Is the right time...
WAAA DOO DAY!
I want my $1 back.
To Beeeee with the one you love...
Waaa doo dayy! Waaaa doo day!

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Well, I'll hang out.. s'long as you promise me one thing.
What's that?
Don't make me touch that...
Touch what?
That freakin' thing. I think he's rabid.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
So, you're the Pentium 4?
{YES.COMMAND.PLEASE}
What can you do?
{WELL.I.CAN} *bzzt*
And you were worried about clock speeds!
Hrm, guess there are still a few bugs to work out...

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
And Bugs Bunny thought HE had problems...
Whoa, must have taken a wrong turn outa that Mediocre town...
Hey there stranger.
Hey yours- HOLY CRAP! Your pixels are bigger than my friggin' eyes!
That's right big boy... I'm more than a match for you. *wink*
Will this be the end of our hero?! Oh fer chrissake, you know the answer already.
Stop.. touching... my leg...
You know you want me...

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Now it's time for, THE JESUS SHOW!
Billy, do you know whattime it is?
Yeah! It's JESUS TIME!
NO! It's "hang my rotting, half-dead carcass to this pole so I can DIE for YOUR fucking sins time!"
...Or that...
No, wait Billy, come back, my scrotum needs scratching! COME BACK!
MOMEEEE!!!

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Davesco! Hey baby, I need some sweet lovin. Bend over, this hermie's here ta give it to ya!
Do I have to call you "big daddy" like last time?
Damn right. First, SUCK ME!
Yes SIR! I love it when you are forceful!
NOT something you wanna walk in on.
Oh yeah, SWALLOW that snake!
Hey, freakish redhead chick! I found that cookbook my mom got me for Chrism- HOLY MOTHER OF FUCK!

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Hey Dan, what you got in the bag?
You remember that movie, To Kill A Mockingbird, where that guy had coke in his bag, but said it was whiskey?
Yeah?
Well?
Me too.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Guest Starring: The Guy Who Says Moh At the End Of Every Strip!
So, Mr. "Guy who says Moh" at the end of every strip... What's your life like?
You're not very talkative, are you?
Moh.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Man, imagine what that skull guy would have to do if a strip lasted for six, or even NINE frames. I don't think anyone could stay silent that long. Except an idiot.
Mustard and jelly...
I rest my case.
I like men's shorts.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Hey! Welcome back! Today we have author "james"! Welcome james!
Uh.. hello... is that... a camera?
Why yes, it is! You know, we have something in common, my name is James too!
I.. um... cool... I gott-
Dammit! Why are all the funny ones camera shy?!
*zoom*

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
What you up to little girl?
Me and my, erm, daddy, are going to destroy Davesco! Wanna help?
Awww, you shouldn't do that cuz... Cuz...
Well?
Will our heroes defeat the horribly unfunny writing of Davesco? Stay tuned!
I'M THINKING DAMMIT!
I hate to quote GAP ads, but, This Is Too Easy.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
I couldn't help it, I had an idea, and needed to steal a character :P
Yoh?
Whoa!
Toe!
Zoe!
Whoa..
No, no, no you idiots. Moh.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Hey Jesus. I see you're hopping on a cross. That's gotta hurt the nail wounds.
*ungh* Yeah... I can take it though.
I have this, hammer, you know, I could take them out for you.
...
D'oh!
It's MOH you freakin' wannabe saviour!

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
I think I'll use this red phone, conviniently laid out in front of the police station!
HEY! Get off me!
Whoa! Hey, it's the Red Phone! Hey, I love your comic strip. I just gotta ask, how do you have sex, I mean, you're just a phone.
You know that joke that goes "How do you get four blondes to sit on a barstool" and the punchline's "Turn it upside down"?
Ummm.. Yeah, it sounds familiar... Point being?
I'm on a table. I can't be removed. There are nerves between me an' tha table. Do the math.

 

by DragonXero
2-27-01
Hmmmm... can't afford new test animals, so I'll have to go FIND them...
Kitty kitty kitty?
*Mrow?*
There you are kitty!
You don't get out much, do ya doc? *crunch* I love eating pussy. *crunch*

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