All comics by LBH

Profile

 

by LBH
7-24-06
First day on the job
So, how would you like that burger?
Up your momma's ass.
...
I have the feeling you don't respect me.
I have the feeling you flunked kindergarden.

 

by LBH
7-24-06
Can I take your order?
Do you have salad?
Salad? You come to the Parasol, the greatest burger joint in town, and you order a salad?
I like salad.
Alright, one salad. Anything to drink?
Is it possible to drink salad?

 

by LBH
7-25-06
Ninja vs. Pirate
This burger is so tasty! This has to be the greatest burger I have ever had!
ARRR!!!
I am so glad the Parasol escaped demolition so these delicious burgers will continue to be available to consumers.
ARRR!!!
This guy is so dense. I'm gonna destroy him as soon as I finish my burger
ARRR!!!

 

by LBH
7-25-06
Can I take your order?
Boy, I'd like a taste of that.
Whatever. Can I get your anything?
I could eat a whole statue of you made of ice cream.
Later, in the kitchen...
...and he wants you to pee in his coke and stick his fries up your butt.
So, basically, he wants a number seven?

 

by LBH
7-25-06
Hey, aren't you Pat Boone, the famous singer?
Yes I am. Why do you ask?
Just wondering.

 

by LBH
7-25-06
Well, I just killed Pat Boone.
That will be the last time somebody orders a salad at the Parasol.
That's what you think.
Ack!!! I thought I killed you!!!
Silly mortal. You can't kill Pat Boone, you fool. HAHAHAHAHA!!!

 

by LBH
7-25-06
Meanwhile, in the kitchen...
What was that commotion out there?
Well, that creepy beatnik guy I told you about blew up that salad guy from earlier...
...who turns out to be Pat Boone, and also turns out to be evil and immortal, and resurected himself.
(sigh) Its gonna be another one of those days
If he starts singing Metalica, I'm leaving.

 

by LBH
7-26-06
Oh my goodness, its Satan!!! What are you doing here?
You were so highly recommended.
Who on earth would recommend us to Satan?
Earlier that day...
I'm starving.
I know where you can get a really good salad.

 

by LBH
7-26-06
Oh no, Pat Boone Recommended our restaurant to Satan.
Now all the freaks are gonna start showing up.
Aw, come on. It can't be that bad.
Thank you, Father. I always wanted to be an altar boy.
You can start by lighting my candle right now.

 

by LBH
7-26-06
All these years of building a family establishment, and now the Parasol is a den of freaks.
At least business is good.
But I have no idea of what will happen next.
Meanwhile...
Their cheesy fries are to die for.
As soon as Mel Gibson says "Cut", I'm there.

 

by LBH
7-27-06
Aren't these burgers great?
...urk...
That's an awful big instrument to cut a burger.
...eep...
...gaak...

 

by LBH
7-28-06
Oh no, that guy in the bunny suit killed the ninja.
And he was on of our best customers.
Would it be cool if I finished his burger?

 

by LBH
7-29-06
???
That pimp guy ate my burger. Can I have another one?
Ack!!! I just saw that guy in the bunny suit kill you!!!
Nah. You cannot kill a ninja that easily. We tend to me immortal at times.
That gives me an idea. How would you like to kill Pat Boone?
And live the dream of millions? It would be an honor.

 

by LBH
7-29-06
I know we are sworn enemies, but I need your help to kill Pat Boone. Will you help me?
ARRR!!!
Okay, "Arr" once for no, and twice for yes.
ARRR ARRR!!!
Good enough for me.

 

by LBH
7-29-06
Im going to kill Pat Boone, and I am assembling a crew of pirates to help me. Can I count on you?
What has Pat Boone done that is so bad?
He had recommended my favorite resturaunt to Satan, unleashing a swarm of freaks, messing up its family-friendly atmosphere.
Oh, I thought it was because of that stupid metal album he did.
Well, that too.
That punk is dead meat!!!

 

by LBH
7-29-06
I hear he is pretty tough, and its gonna take a lot of manpower.
So, I'm gonna need al the pirates I can gather.
So, what do you say? Are you with me?
Why are you in my bedroom?

 

by LBH
7-29-06
Hello, we are the default girls.
We are giving you a break from the Parasol madness, and giving you something profound, maybe.
First of all, I would like to talk about how Citizen Kane is one of the greatest movie in cinematic history.
I cannot wait until Snakes on a Plane is out.
I would expect that from Poke-Er-Hontas.
And you do you love long time?

 

by LBH
7-29-06
Hello, Uncle Melty. I am assembling an army to kill Pat Boone.
Are you with me?
I don't have any arms.
Why does this sound so familiar?

 

by LBH
7-29-06
Greetings, fellow ninja. Would you like to join my team?
We are going to kill Pat Boone.
Pat Boone? Pat Boone killed my father.
So, are you with me?
Well, my father was a jerk, but that metal album really sucked...

 

by LBH
7-29-06
I am assembling a team so I can kill Pat Boone.
Are you with me?
What can I do?
Can you not take some bug spray and a shoe and make a bomb?
I hate Carlos Mencia

 

by LBH
7-29-06
Guess the reference
I'm off to kill Pat Boone. Will you help me?
Sure.
I'm gonna kill Pat Boone. Will you join me?
Sure.
I have pirates, ninjas, zombies AND robots. Why does that sound familiar?

 

by LBH
7-30-06
So, we are going to kill Pat Boone. Can I get your support?
Well, most of my guys are chipping away parts of this moon rock, but I can get you lots of cell phones, since they are useless now.
How about those kneecapping sticks. He does have kneecaps
Sure, I'll pull the truck around.
Thank you, Don. Shall I kiss your ring?
Not until you wipe the ketsup off of your mouth...or is it catsup?

 

by LBH
7-30-06
I think it was Sean Connerey!!!
And I'm absolutely sure it wasn't!!!
Wait...aren't we supposed to be IN the ocean?
Yeah, I think you are right.
Anyway, it WAS Sean Connerey!!!
I don't even know what's going on.

 

by LBH
7-30-06
This isn't gonna end well.
You're darn tootin' it isn't.
So, you want to go get a burger?
I could go for a salad.

 

by LBH
7-31-06
Young live at the Parasol
I lvoe you! I need you! I must have you!
I have never been able to put my feelings into words before! So? Please says something!!!
I'm sorry, I was playing Sudoku. Did you want to say something?
Can I finish your burger?

 

by LBH
7-31-06
Officer, officer, I'm glad you are here! Some guy came allong and stabbed me in the nuts!
He was around six foot two, dark complected, short cropped hair, full beard, maybe early 30's. Anything else you need to know?
Sorry, I was playing Sudoku. Did you say something?
I'm going home.

 

Who's drunker?
...and, where did you say that cat went?
It's right here, can you not see...oh, wait, its gone.
by LBH, 7-31-06

 

Dis somebody just say "Uraguay?"
No. He just said "U R Gay."
by LBH, 8-01-06

 

by LBH
8-02-06
Heeeeey, baby. Why don't you sit on down in that chair and I'll check out that pretty mouth of yours.
Who on earth are you?
I'm your funky parapalegic dentist.
Now I have seen it all.

 

by LBH
8-03-06
Hello. Butt-Butt am me. Butt-Butt am a smart. This am Butt-Butt show.
On Butt-Butt show today, Butt-Butt am talk to a friendly nice telephone. Hello Telephone.
*RING RING*
What a mean thing for Butt-Butt to hear!!! Show over!!! Show over!!!

 

by LBH
8-03-06
So, I'm out to kill Pat Boone. Do I have your support?
I don't know. I don't like to resort to violence to solve problems.
I perfer to settle differences in a peaceful, yet boring manner.
I'll give you pudding.
Lemmie at 'em!!!

 

by LBH
8-05-06
Don, it appears he hasn't paid up yet.
I guess he needs a little more convincing.
Hey, Tony. I have a little problem I need you to take care of.
I'm on it, boss.
That next morning...
AAAAAAAAAAAAA

 

by LBH
8-05-06
I got a rodeo in my pants.
No, there arent't any openings.
Dam

 

by LBH
8-05-06
Okay, in this scene, I want you to suck him off until his butt turns red and he starts screeching.
Then I want you to hack up a hairball on your chest and rub it into your boobs.
Gotcha.
And...ACTION
Oh, baby, you drive me bananas.
And to think, I turned down that MLM venture...for THIS.

 

by LBH
8-05-06
Je n'ai jamais, jamais souhaité j'étais un Oscar Meyer Weiner mais je ne m'occuperais pas d'être un ventilateur de plafond.
Je laisse ma bosse de chien ma jambe, mais la chienne devient toujours fâchée quand bosse de I sa jambe.
Why did I let you trag me to see the French Poet Dinosaur?
I like him.

 

by LBH
8-05-06
Don't run away! I must control you!
First I destroy you, and then I destroy the world.
Help, I'm being chased by a fiendish pink donkey!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

 

by LBH
8-05-06
Today on Butt-Butt show, Butt-Butt am talk to Tobor
TOBOR MANRAPE YOU!!!
Butt-Butt am intrigued
HAR HAR

 

by LBH
8-05-06
Today Tobor show Butt-Butt a fun thing to do.
YOU MUST TURN AROUND FOR TOBOR
Okay, Butt-Butt am the ready
HERE COMES THE BULL!!!
A few moments later...
Ooooh, Butt-Butt like.

 

by LBH
8-05-06
Life. Would. Be. A. Whole. Lot. Better. If. All. White. People. Were. Named. Dave. And. All. Black. People. Were. Named. Marcus.
Hi Dave.
Hi Marcus.
See. What. I. Mean.

 

by LBH
8-05-06
I got a rodeo in my pants
Me want ride horsey
Believe me, little girl, you aren't old enough to ride this horse.
ME WANT RIDE HORSEY!!!
Later that evening...
Now, remember, that was a SECRET rodeo.
Me tushie hurts *sob*

 

by LBH
8-06-06
Butt-Butt am talking to new special friend
SORRY, BUTT-BUTT, BUT IT IS OVER BETWEEN US
But, Tobor, Butt-Butt thought what Butt-Butt and Tobor had am special.
SORRY, TOOTS, BUT I'M SPLITSVILLE
Show over *sob*

 

by LBH
8-06-06
Oh no, it's the end of the world!
There's nobody but me and the rodeo in my pants!
Oh, yeah. And this guy.
moh!

 

by LBH
8-06-06
One day at the ranch...
So I says. "Well, them rotor turbines ain't gonna generate gravitons by themselves!"
Ha. Ha.
I. Completely. Understand. What. You. Are. Talking. About.
On today's news, new website, stripcreator.com, looses all its popularity after only one week.
We died.

 

by LBH
8-06-06
*sob* Oh, Tobor
*sob* Why, Tobot, why?
After a few minutes with Mr. Sticks-His-Dick-in-Your-Ass-While-You're-Looking-the-Other-Direction
Tobor who?

 

by LBH
8-06-06
I got a rodeo in my pants.
Hey, how much for you to clean after the bull?
Ten bucks an hour.
But I told you I would do it for free.
I told you to GO AWAY!!!

 

by LBH
8-08-06
C'mon, guys, hurry up.
How are things going?
Not so good, the workers aren't mining the moon rock fast enough.
Is that so? I think I might have an idea.
a little while later...
So, you want me to whip them until they work faster?
No. I want you to tell them you won't whip them until they work faster. In the meantime, how about working your magic on me for a little while?

 

by LBH
8-08-06
Ho ho ho, Merry Christmas!!!
Oops, it looks like Jesus was crucified on Christmas instead of Easter. I wonder what effect this will have on history.
Several thousands of years later...
moh!

 

by LBH
8-08-06
Today Butt-Butt am having new special friend, Mr. Sticks-His-Dick-in-Your-Ass-While-You're-Looking-the-Other-Direction
Its good to be here.
Him am the best friend in the world, and am bestest at fun thing to do.
Him am even better than Tobor
WHAT!!!

 

by LBH
8-09-06
So, Butt-Butt and special friend am happy together.
Yep
Butt-Butt and special friend are best at fun thing to do.
AHEM
Uh oh

 

by LBH
8-09-06
Wanna go on a murder ride?
FISHBOY!!!
The End?
Glub...blarg...

Showing page 1.

Next »