All comics by TheMadcapLaughs

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by TheMadcapLaughs
7-06-03
This shouldn't be that bad...
Are you the person I talked to about the job?
No, I'm just here to buy some crack.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
7-06-03
30 minutes later...
That's one of the ugliest shirts, I've ever seen.
My mom gave it to me for my birthday last year.
It's just awful...
My mom smokes crack.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
7-07-03
Hey, look at this bottle I found. It washed up on the beach.
I think it's pretty....
I want you to take that bottle and strike me repeatedly in the face.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
7-07-03
A day in the life...
Hi, my name is Lily and I'm 8 years old.
I play chess in graveyards.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
7-07-03
3:00 A.M.
What the hell is that noise?!
3:01 A.M.
Ouch! Where's the damn light switch!?
3:02 A.M.
I couldn't find my lip balm.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
7-07-03
My girlfriend broke up with me. She said I was boring and angst-ridden. She also said I brought a general feeling of ennui to everyone around me.
Do you even know what ennui means?
It means I make people extremely happy just by being around them.
Hmm, I'm pretty sure you're wrong.
...
I love unicorns!

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
7-08-03
Why did you use a carrot for my nose?
You're a snowman. A carrot nose is a requirement!
...what about some corn-on-the-cob arms, while you were at it?
I know I gave you pieces of coal for eyes, but do I look like a farmer? Besides, I didn't want you to get eaten by a deer so fast this time.
...eaten?

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
7-09-03
What are you looking at?
I'm watching the gentle lapping of the waves... the graceful leaps of a school of dolphins... I can almost taste the intoxicating, salty ocean breeze.
You're scratching your balls, aren't you?

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
7-09-03
Do you think I'll meet any women on this cruise?
Yeah, I think you will meet some women. You'll also see a look of horror on their faces, not unlike that of a murder victim.
Why would a woman have that type of a reaction?
Well for starters, you're wearing that damn shirt your mother gave you.
Should I take my shirt off?

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
7-09-03
I wonder if anyone has ever fallen off this ship and drowned? ...must be a horrible way to die.
I don't know, but I think I see a shark out by that reef.
Shark! Where?!
Over by the coral. If you lean out really far on the railing you can see him, plain as day! It's majestic! You have to really ...

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
7-30-03
Are we lost?
It looks that way, my bovine friend.
I need grass to graze on. All I see here are rocks and dirt. I'm starving...
Well, I'm hungry too ...and thirsty.
You could milk me.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
8-01-03
Look at this booger. It's like 4 inches long.
It felt like I was pullin' a rope outta my nose.
It is impressive.
Yes, just let it dry right there on the side of your head ...you magnificent bastard.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
8-01-03
Have you heard if this restaurant is any good?
Well, I read that they make a great plate of sweet meats.
What are sweet meats?
You know like sugar coated meat donuts, made out of balls and lungs...
...umm, and maybe a trachea.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
8-11-03
Why are we in your bedroom?
I wanted to show you my new lamp.
Seriously? That's the reason you asked me in here?
Of course.
I want to caress your back hump, you gentle freak. Oh, sweet agony...

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
8-11-03
Your pineapple head is as big as my entire body. It's like your face is a giant skillet.
Yes, thanks for noticing I have a gigantic cranium.
...Your eyes remind me of fried eggs.
Are you insulting me or making breakfast?
Don't worry about it, twat-waffle.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
8-12-03
There's that new men's clothing store I was telling you about.
Oh sweet, maybe I'll get a jacket like yours.
There's the food court.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
8-12-03
Have you thought about my proposition?
I'm intrigued, but I'm not sure yet.
Well you don't have to decide right now. I just wanted to let you have the first opportunity, and I know you're good with your hands...
I appreciate you coming to me first. Still, this is something most people do alone.
Hey, I just like to watch. I figured you would have more fun anyway.
Well I could use the money, but I have to warn you, this is the first plasma TV I've ever hung on a wall.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
8-12-03
Bitch, you got crazy eyes!
I'm Bipolar!
I'm Bipolar!
Fuck me snow beast!

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
6-27-04
What do you think of the nature hike so far?
It's alright, I guess...
Well, it gets better once we cross that bridge up ahead.
...that bridge doesn't look safe.
It's not. It's a deathtrap.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
6-27-04
It's a deathtrap.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
6-28-04
What's your name?
They call me Hammerhead.
You're not very attractive.
I'm not?
I think you are possibly the most hideous creature God ever put on this earth...but damn, what a terrific penis you have!
Everybody loves shark cock.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
7-10-04
Here's your Christmas present.
I hope you got me what I wanted.
I sure did.
Sweet.
Yep, one pound of beef, some onions and a ladle...
Meatloaf. Recognize.

 

by TheMadcapLaughs
7-10-04
I'm gonna try to quit smoking.
What, cigarettes?
Cock.
...so do you think I can beat it?

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