All comics by YAYitsAndrew

 

How the Computer Illiterate Die by YAYitsAndrew 12-31-02
The guy next to you just bought Windows XP. Dear User, thank you for being the first to actually pay for Windows XP. Signed, Bill Gates	Dude, guess what i just bought!	Please, take me first. You mean it's on the internet?

 

The Birth of Extreme Chess by YAYitsAndrew 12-31-02
Deep within an abandoned warehouse... Couldn't we have a rematch?	...an old lady, desperate for cash, and a young college grad settle their bet. You know the rules grandma, I won fair and square.	But... But nothing. You agreed that if I won you would stick your hand in a blender. Now lets hurry this up, I have a meeting in 20 minutes.

 

Why Your Grandma Doesn't Leave the House by YAYitsAndrew 12-31-02
Hey where are the rest of the raisins you wrinkly old bitch?	Gee ma'am, are my tits gonna sag like that some day?	Officer, I need your help! The only thing I'll help you with is a kick to the face. I have lots of parking tickets to write, and I don't have time to deal with your helpless elderly problems.

 

Through the Wonders of Comic Strip Science... by YAYitsAndrew 1-01-03
We've switched what this man says in AOL chatrooms with what he says in real life... Hello, do you have the time? Tommy12YearsOld: asl??	Let's see if he notices. Thanks, have a nice day. Tommy12YearsOld: wtf	Hi my name is Jessica, and I'm a 13 year old swimsuit model. Wanna meet somewhere? wtf...

 

The Chinese Were Eating it First by YAYitsAndrew 1-01-03
Hello, I'm on vacation here and your Earth food has killed my wife. Her flesh only lasted me 4 days, and I'm in need of food. Can you help? Well..uh... what do you eat?	It's hard to explain, I know you have them on this planet but their name escapes me. They're little, round, squishy... Olives? Grapes?	Ah yes, eyeballs, that's it. Could you give me your eyeballs please? I'm late for my meeting, I better get going.

 

The Cat Has Your Lighter by YAYitsAndrew 1-01-03
Listen, I know I've been annoying the past...	The truth is, I can't help but want to eat you. Have no fear though, today is the end of all your troubles. I'm reforming, I promise I won't hurt you anymore.	Oops.

 

The Asianation of the World by YAYitsAndrew 1-03-03
moo? Come with me. You must be assimilated.	Everyone must be assimilated. Yes. Even us.	Our plan is almost complete. Yes. Soon everyone will be a big headed asian.

 

Monkey Domination Plan: First a Matador, Tomorrow the World! by YAYitsAndrew 1-03-03
You gotta help me! There's a huge bull chasing me and when it catches me it's going to gore my intestines and feast on my liver!	Gotta go, he's coming! Please hurry!	Oh jesus! I'm cornered! I'm sure glad that monkey is going to come along and save me any minute now! No! No!! AGGGHHGH!!!

 

This Only Works in Your Parents' Basement, in Your Dreams by YAYitsAndrew 1-05-03
Forsoothe! I have wandered many moons to get here!	I wish to hold thine hand under starlit skyes and whisk you away to mine woodland cottage.	Doest thou accept mine valiant and princely request? Police!

 

You Can Only Push That Paperclip So Far... by YAYitsAndrew 1-05-03
It appears you are making a comic!	What are you trying to do today? [] Write witty stuff. [] Achieve humour. [] Gouge out my happy little paperclip eyes with a sharp stick.	Finally, I get to silence that stupid waste of pixels once and for all. Hey fleshbag, here I am. Get out your stick and try me. You're all so courageous behind that damn keyboard. Well I ain't lost yet buddy, so get off your ass and let's do this.

 

At Least She Was Wearing Depends Undergarments by YAYitsAndrew 1-07-03
Hey lady, you wanna see a cool clown trick?	Just stand right there while I get everything ready.	Later that day... Well I thought it'd be safe, how was I to know she had fragile bones? How can anything involving a clown and a steam roller be considered safe?

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