All comics by Beelzebozo

Profile

 

by Beelzebozo
2-20-01
It's finally here! Freedom! The bloated, coercive, poisionous wreck of Western civilization has crumbled!
No shit, Sherlock. What clued you in? The flaming Supreme Court Justices?
Don't you see? This is an opportunity to rebuild! To create a new society not ruined by the corrupt vastness of old! Anarchistic communes, governed by REAL democratic methods, not tainted with the...
Whatever. I don't think that Foot Locker has been totally gutted yet.
Hey! Get back here, you granola-sucking wankstick! I saw it first!
Step off, Pippie Slutstocking, or I'll rip off your pigtails and feed them to you. Papa needs a new pair of Birkenstocks!

 

by Beelzebozo
2-20-01
You've got to except the idea that God never wanted you, He wants nothing to do with you, in all probability, he hates you...
Right, I dig it.
This is not the worst thing that can happen. We don't need Him. Fuck Redemption. If we are God's unwanted children...SO BE IT!
.......................................
Dude, where's my car?

 

by Beelzebozo
2-21-01
Isn't it great to be a cute little Asian girl?
Don't ask me, sister. You might be cute, but I look like Joe Pesci with pigtails.
So that explains why I get all the action, huh?
I wouldn't be so cocky, wench. I may be ugly, but you've got a sausage dangling under that skirt.
Eat me, Pesci-bitch.
Sorry, Mister, I've already had my daily allowance of pork.

 

by Beelzebozo
2-21-01
You've got to go over there and whip them damnyankees, boy. Remember, you're fighting for the survival of the South!
Yeah, I've been thinkin' about that, General. Aren't we just dying to preserve an obsolete, corrupt landed aristocracy that disenfranchises the majority of white people by chaining them to....
small dirt farms without access to public education, while keeping black people in an incredibly immoral system of chattel slavery, preserving the status quo using provincialism and race hierarchy?
Damn, but that flag sure it neat-o, ain't it? Looks just like the top of the General Lee.
Shit, General, you know I love them Duke Boys. Whooo-hooo! Let's go over the top, boys! CHARGE!

 

by Beelzebozo
2-21-01
Time to die, you rebel scum!
Do we really have to go through this pathetic charade again?
What are you talking about, Secesh?
Don't you see that our enemy isn't each other? It's the entrenched capitalist system that destroys class consciousness by fostering nationalism and war mongering!
You may have something there, friend. Maybe proletarian solidarity IS the key to equal and fair treatment for all mank---
BANG! Got you, Reb! I can't believe you fell for that "Workers of the World Unite" horseshit! I got it off the back of a box of Karl Marx brand Cocoa Puffs!

 

by Beelzebozo
2-21-01
Somewhere in the Sky over Golgatha, early thirties, A.D.
Forgive me father, for they....hey, what's the dilly, yo?
Greetings, Earth-Man. We have abducted you from your execution.
Shit, you've got to get me back there. I have to die for the sins of mankind, so that the people can reenter their covenant with God.
Sorry, we're already out of orbit and we've got some dynomite probes all ready for you.
Oh, well, I guess Earth will have to settle for that Muslim shit that's coming up in a few hundred years.
Try to relax, Mr. Christ. Just think about the nails embedded in your arms and legs...this is going to be a little cold.

 

by Beelzebozo
2-22-01
Blowjobs, here! Get your hot, saliva-rich blowjobs! Two bucks to spit, five bucks to swallow! Get 'em while I'm herpes-free!
Excuse me, Ma'am, do you take...special requests.
It depends on how "special" and how much money is involved. I don't go in for any prevert stuff...
I think we can come to an understanding...
Five Minutes Later...
Damn, I didn't think flaying your skin off could hurt so much! You are a sickie, kid, that's for sure. But so what? Ten bucks sure makes up for the most crucial part of the human immune system.
Shut up and keep dancing, Lord Skeletor...

Showing page 1.