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El_Phen
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Rated: R-tard
by
El_Phen
6-27-12
I really suck at comedy.
That's true. Don't give up your day job. What is your day job anyway?
I'm a prostitute.
Wow. You really do suck, as the Jewish family said to the Nazi vaccum cleaner.
...........................FIN
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El_Phen's Comics
05/22/16 - My current favourite joke
06/04/14 - The Zombinator
06/02/14 - Do a google search. He exists.
06/02/14 - A joke stolen from facebook - be gentle, It's been a while.
06/09/13 - Randomly Appearing Snowman - The Return
06/27/12 - Rated: R-tard
06/21/12 - This is why we never see the plumber fix the washing machine
06/16/12 - Australian army recruiting procedures
06/10/12 - Days of our Military Lives (7):Colonel Cthulu waits...
06/10/12 - Superman upsets his bacon girlfriend
06/09/12 - Days of our Military Lives (6)
06/09/12 - Days of our Military Lives (5)
06/09/12 - Days of our Military Lives (4)
06/09/12 - Days of our Military Lives (3)
06/09/12 - Days of our Military Lives (2)
06/09/12 - Days of our Military Lives (1)
06/05/12 - CC:556 Forward to the Past!
06/14/11 - Five years later...
06/06/11 - A Chinese guy meets a snowman outside a bar...
01/26/10 - Should I have said 'Dog'?
05/18/09 - Fett the Bounty Hunter (Theme tune)
11/14/08 - Office Pirates (2)
11/14/08 - My 200th comic SPECTACULAR!
11/14/08 - Jesus' failed childrens TV show ideas
10/19/08 - Office Pirates
09/03/08 - cc: 399 - Polite refusal Part deux
09/03/08 - CC: 399 - Polite refusal
07/11/08 - Star Days of our Trek Lives (3)
07/11/08 - Star Days of our Trek Lives (2)
07/11/08 - Star days of our Trek lives (1)
07/08/08 - Before someone else does it...
06/04/08 - CC:390 Fifties information film
05/31/08 - How time travel would work out for me.
05/21/08 - It mentions 'Birthdays'...
05/12/08 - Bob and Jim (7) Death by Taxes
04/23/08 - CC:387 (inc. CC386) How Moby Dick should have gone
04/18/08 - CC: 386 What if Marty HAD got shot in Back to the Future II?
04/18/08 - CC:386 How Star Wars would have gone in real life
03/18/08 - CC 384: I'm sorry I really am.
03/11/08 - The day I realised I was a grown-up - Inspired by real life
02/28/08 - CC: 382 - Days of our Alien Lives (6)
02/28/08 - CC:382 - Days of our Alien Lives (5)
02/28/08 - CC:382 - Days of our Alien Lives (4)
02/28/08 - CC:382 - Days of our Alien Lives (3)
02/28/08 - CC:382 - Days of our Alien Lives (2)
02/28/08 - CC:382 The Days of our Alien Lives (1)
02/22/08 - CC: 381 - The Terminator on a budget
02/22/08 - CC 381: Highlander - The Outtakes
02/19/08 - CC:381 Highlander
02/15/08 - Bob and Jim (6)
02/15/08 - Bob and Jim (5)
02/14/08 - Bob and Jim (4)
02/12/08 - CC:380 Bob and Jim (3)
02/12/08 - CC: 380 Bob and Jim (2)
02/12/08 - CC: 380 Bob and Jim (1)
02/10/08 - CC:380 If Riggs and Murtagh had died in the explosion
09/10/07 - To the rescue!
08/30/07 - Randomly Appearing Snowman saves the day!
08/30/07 - I shouldn't do this whilst tired
08/28/07 - Randomly Appearing Snowman
07/02/07 - Why office relationships never work
06/22/07 - CC: 359 - I'm going to Hell anyway.
05/15/07 - Inspired by Youtube - A better version of 'The Ring'
04/23/07 - The joke would work if his glove was white
04/23/07 - Mating rituals of the shock-jock
04/22/07 - My brain on drugs.
04/19/07 - Not quite Street Fighter
04/13/07 - One of the reasons I hate cats. (Based on a true story)
03/30/07 - CC 351: TOBOR enters the drug trade.
03/22/07 - CC 350: The Revenge
03/22/07 - Faster than a speeding bullet
03/11/07 - CC: 349 A Cautionary Tale.
03/07/07 - Pee-Wee's Play House - Minus the budget
02/19/07 - Methods of escaping zombies 2: Don't be the token black guy
02/16/07 - CC 347: Stick it up your portmanteau
02/09/07 - CC: 346
12/21/06 - CC 342 : Merry XXXMas
12/18/06 - It's been done (and so has she).
12/18/06 - Methods of escaping zombies 1 - Don't be unpopular.
12/10/06 - The Future
12/08/06 - At least it's not a donkey
12/08/06 - Back to the studio
12/08/06 - Why donkey masks? They're just funny.
12/05/06 - You should have gone private.
12/03/06 - More Movies Starring Neil
12/02/06 - I'll only be a minute
11/29/06 - Death Has A Name
11/29/06 - Dave's Dreams - Part 3: The Nightmare Begins
11/28/06 - Dave's Dreams - Part 2: The Surreal Bit
11/21/06 - Dave's Dreams - Part 1: The Nice Bit
11/21/06 - The Girls of Games Night
11/21/06 - Darren versus the Ghost Of Death
11/16/06 - He ain't heavy...he's REALLY heavy (and my brother)
11/07/06 - How to attract the ladies - Various Methods
11/06/06 - A Random comic starring Stuart
11/05/06 - Chris2 v The Ghost of Death
11/05/06 - Senor Pennington v The Ghost of Death
11/05/06 - Stuart and the Ghost of Death
11/05/06 - James meets the Ghost O' Death
11/05/06 - Neil v The Ghost of Death
11/05/06 - Chris1 v The Ghost of Death
11/05/06 - Unhappy Hallow 'en - Dave's encounter with a ghost
11/04/06 - Wine Jokes With Dave
10/28/06 - Partying is such sweet sorrow (2)
10/28/06 - Partying is such sweet sorrow (1)
10/14/06 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus-Part 60: How They Gig
10/10/06 - The Use of Star Wars Lines in Everyday Life
10/10/06 - The Afterlife 10
10/10/06 - The Afterlife 9
10/10/06 - The Afterlife 8
09/30/06 - Afterlife 7
09/30/06 - The Afterlife 6
09/23/06 - The Afterlife 5
09/22/06 - The Afterlife 4
09/22/06 - Afterlife 3
09/22/06 - The Afterlife 2
09/22/06 - The Afterlife
05/07/06 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus -Part 59: How It Began
05/07/06 - The things I'd tell a younger me - 'Inspired' by LuckyGuess
05/06/06 - Adventures of Perfect Virus - Part 58: Neil on the Farm
05/06/06 - Adventures of Perfect Virus - Part 57:Captain Obvious v Dave
05/06/06 - It Could Happen To Anyone -Thanks for the punchline Neil
05/02/06 - If Neil Made Movies, How Would They End?
05/02/06 - Pillow talk
04/24/06 - Adventures of Perfect Virus-Part 56: The alternate ending
04/24/06 - Adventures of Perfect Virus-Part 56: I'm going to die anyway
04/24/06 - Adventures of Perfect Virus-Part 55: Access all areas
03/31/06 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus Part - Part 54:
03/28/06 - Adventures of Perfect Virus - Part 52: My Life in Television
03/27/06 - Adventures of Perfect Virus - Part 52: Bad Song Title Pun
03/27/06 - Adventures of Perfect Virus - Part 51: When Rock Gods Go Bad
03/24/06 - Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 50 - Life of a Groupie
03/22/06 - Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 49-Things not to tell Dave
03/21/06 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus:Part 48-More Mocking Jesus
02/03/06 - Inside the Mind of...Darren
01/23/06 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 47 - Giggin it Large!
12/24/05 - Inside the Mind of...
12/24/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus - Part 46: Christmas Virus
12/20/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus - Part 45: Practice Makes...
12/09/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 43 - Chaos Theory
11/06/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 42 - Paul's Mind
11/06/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 42 - Into Neil's Mind
11/06/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 41 - Into Dave's Mind
11/06/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus:Part 40-It Matters, Trust Me
11/02/05 - It Had to Happen
10/31/05 - Ruling the World - The Finale
10/27/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 39 - Wrong Door Paul.
10/27/05 - The Adventures of PerfectVirus:Part38-If Dave was a Stickman
10/25/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 37: Ruling the World
10/25/05 - More "Ruling the World"
10/25/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 36 - Pay Attention!
10/16/05 - Ruling The World
10/16/05 - The Advebtures of Perfect Virus: Part 35 -Why God Hates Dave
09/23/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 34 - This is Awkward
09/23/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 33-Its' good to be Foy
09/15/05 - Answers to "What Super Powers Would You Like to Have & Why?"
09/10/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 32 - Practice makes...
09/10/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus:Part 31-Something about Dave
09/10/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 30 - Dave has problems
09/06/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 29 - Paul's Problem.
09/06/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 28 - if Dave was Magic
09/06/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 27 - He was excited!
09/06/05 - Third time's a charm...
09/06/05 - It only gets worse...
09/06/05 - How racism starts
09/04/05 - Wake me up when September ends.
09/04/05 - It's one or the other.
09/04/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 26 - Don't say it!
09/04/05 - Why Neil isn't allowed in churches.
09/04/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 24 - Dave mocks Satan
09/04/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus Part 25-Dave's going to Hell
08/25/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 23 - Miss Understood
08/25/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 23 - Woman Trouble
08/18/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 22 - Your Biggest Fan
08/18/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 21 - Crappy Diem
08/18/05 - Always Funny or Why You Shouldn't tell James ANYTHING-Part 2
08/17/05 - Famous Last Words (Oh come on, everyone's done it!)
08/16/05 - Not quite Shakespere.
08/16/05 - 2001: A Space Oddity
08/15/05 - Movies in 3 Frames - Aliens
08/15/05 - The Godfather Trilogy (In 3 Frames)
08/13/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 20 - Who Needs Dave?
08/13/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 19 - Neil's Holiday
08/12/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 18 - BBQ Time!
08/12/05 - When Robots Go Wrong
08/12/05 - You Can't Take Him Anywhere
08/12/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus:Part 17-Where's The Drummer?
07/30/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 16 - Dave Mocks Jesus
07/30/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 15 - Say My Name!
07/30/05 - Darren and Chris2 enter the pub. Again.
07/30/05 - We knew he'd come in useful ONE day
07/28/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 14 - Intelligent Life?
07/28/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 13 - Chatting To Dave
07/21/05 - The adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 12 - What Can You Say?
07/21/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 11 - We've MADE it!
07/21/05 - Have a nice trip?
06/25/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 10 - Who needs fame?
06/25/05 - Always two there are...
06/25/05 - This may be funny to approximately 6 people on Earth
06/24/05 - The Adventurs of Perfect Virus: Part 9 - Enter the Bassist
06/24/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 8 - Neil's Dilemma
06/20/05 - A nice place to visit (But I wouldn't want to live there)
06/19/05 - She told me she was sixteen!
06/19/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 7 - Dave gets a date
06/18/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 6 - Stoned to Death
06/18/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 5 -It's just not funny
06/18/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 4 -An Important Lesson
06/18/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus: Part 3 - The Morning After
06/18/05 - A night out for James
06/16/05 - The Adventures of Perfect Virus - Part 2: Confusion?
06/16/05 - The adventures of Perfect Virus - Part 1: An old Joke
06/15/05 - An upside to Death
06/15/05 - Answers to unemployment - Part 3
06/15/05 - Answers to unemployment - Part 2
06/15/05 - Answers to unemployment - Part 1
06/15/05 - The REAL first meeting between James and Leanne
06/14/05 - A weak Michael Jackson joke.
06/14/05 - Darren in a pub
06/14/05 - The truth revealed!
06/14/05 - A weak smoking gag.
06/14/05 - Stupid, stupid, stupid.
06/13/05 - Some people are strange. Then there's James.
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