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Jesus, still desperate to have actor Brad Pitt appear at his anti-Stem Cell research rally on Saturday, has kidnapped Pitt's wife, actress/bulimic role model Jennifer Aniston
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| You fiend! I thought that Jesus Christ was supposed to be all loving and merciful and stuff... | |
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| Ha ha! You thought wrong Mrs.Pitt! I used to be into the "Dying for your sins" and " God's only son" schtick, but no more! The human race will kneel before me! | |
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But Jennifer Aniston, whose brain had yet to be cannibalized by her starving body, concocted a plan to keep Jesus busy to give Brad time to find her...
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| But if you are the only begotten son of God, than shouldn't you be able to just make my snuggly-wuggly sugar coated lovey-puff Brad go to your stupid rally? | |
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| Good Lord you are a talky bitch! Mary Magdelon never asked so many questions, she just knew her role and shut her mouth. And if she gave any lip, WHACK, I'd have someone nail her with a stone. | |
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Later, back on Earth, Brad Pitt is joined by his good friend Edward Norton as they decide how to rescue Jennifer from Jesus's evil grasp...
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| All right, we'll bury Jennifer's empty coffin right here, under the big comical "R.I.P" gravestone...how about that, Ed? | |
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| Sounds great, Brad. Don't worry about planning the funeral man, I've been looking forward to it ever since the wedding day! | |
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