All comics by Noahtgreat

 

by Noahtgreat
1-07-01
In a millenium past....
uh oh... my crotch itches...
A savior was born...
And this kid is staring at me...
Anime EXPLOSION!!!
I MEET YOU IN BATTLE!
YOUR WORD IS RIGHT, AND TO DIE IS WHAT MUST BE DONE!

 

by Noahtgreat
1-07-01
I'm wiggity wack mack, on the attack, don't look back, I ain't talkin smack bought mack!
....
I toss cookies get my nookie, contact my bookie, he'll make you looky looky. word.
Shit, man!
Fuck yeah!

 

by Noahtgreat
1-07-01
Wow, so I have an imaginary friend after all....
Mother fucking right you do, goddamn cock sucking shit head kid.
......
Maybe if you'd get your head out of your fucking ass for a few fucking seconds you'd have noticed me these last five fucking years!
I like you better...
Bark Bark, I will touch ANYTHING you ask me too. I have no free will!

 

by Noahtgreat
1-07-01
Anime EXPLOSION!!!
This is fate! We are linked to be here!
So sorry! There is no mercy in death!
Anime EXPLOSION!!!
::PSYCHIC BATTLE!::
::PSYCHIC BATTLE!::
Anime EXPLOSION!!! To be continued...
This is the End! I am victory!
There is no shame in clowning! Let it be known!

 

by Noahtgreat
1-08-01
Noah goes all Andy Kaufman on you...
HEY! Shouldn't you be all entertaining and stuff!!?
No scary head man... For you see--
::Naked Girls::
I don't try to entertain with my work. Oh no, far from it. I strive to elicit a reaction from the audience. i want to make them feel, because I think that to make someone feel is the highest--
While writing this, Noah switched bodies with his talented dog...
JESUS! What the hell are you on??
A ball.

 

by Noahtgreat
1-08-01
A Giant Robot gives the city threat. What will the City do? Die with Honor??
Bleep Bleep, Blop, Bloop, Bleep
ANIME EXPLOSION!!!
To fight the giant robot is honor! No more shall it be!
His heart and brain shall be no more!!
After the epic battle...
We fought with bravery! My spine is hurt!
I am in pain! I will survive no more nights!

 

by Noahtgreat
1-08-01
Return to 100 Aker Woods...
Hello... I'm Eeyore. Years of depression have left me ready to take my life.
I'm Rabbit. I can't stop shaking... It's... so... cold... Please... just leave me alone...
Aliens came and took one of his ears. if only they had taken me so that I might know the sweet embrace of death...
Christopher Robin???
That's CHRISSY Robin.

 

by Noahtgreat
1-09-01
The moon is peril! To breath is to die!
Breathing is what I cannot do! The moon is danger!
Anime Explosion!!!
All must breath! This is no lie!
Oxygen is a right! Honor demands no less!
Breath freely and die! For still there is no atmosphere!
If you can breath, the night is yours! So is my life!

 

by Noahtgreat
1-17-01
He toys with God and thinks he is one!
The world will know my name! Joe! I am deranged!
I will explode when instructed to do so! I am a product of Japanese public schools!
Who can save the world? If only... Wait... ANIME EXPLOSION!!!
We explode for what is right! I will die for my cause or die trying!
This idea is good! I shall follow you to the afterlife!
The world is lost! Stay tuned for rebirth!
AAAH!! OH FUCK I'M ON FIRE!!! CHRIST, OH KILL ME PLEASE JESUS FUCKING HELL OH DAMNIT FUCK!!!
HONOR IS OVER-RATED! FIREY DEATH IS DEATH NONE THE LESS!!

 

by Noahtgreat
1-18-01
At the Abortion Clinic...
Man, I sure am glad I'm having this abortion. No indecision about this at all. No sir. Just gonna be a great fucking abortion.
IGOR! We have a customer!
Two days later.
Goddamnit Pablo! You got me pregnant!
Oh shit. It's splitsville for me!
Five Years Later.
I want a lollipop and a doll and six pounds of feta cheese and a donkey and four glow sticks and a fish the size of grandma and I want a parrot and I want--
SHUT UP KID! I KILLED YOUR BROTHER AND I CAN KILL YOU TOO!!

 

by Noahtgreat
1-18-01
Deep in a cavern...
Yessir.. Just gaurdin me treasure... Yep... just guarding it all day long... yessir...
BBBBBRRRRRRRRRRAAAAKK!!!
Hhhmm... Sounds like a goat in heat... Better not investigate...
BRAAACHK!
That sounds enough like a goat in heat that I won't investigate

 

by Noahtgreat
2-01-01
Noah expresses his feelings towards his dying computer
YOU MOTHER FUCKING COCK SUCKER PIECE OF SHIT GODDAMNED SON OF A BITCH PIECE OF SHIT SORRY ASS EXCUSE FOR A PIECE OF SHIT FUCKING SHIT DAMN COMPUTER!
I HOPE YOU FUCKING DIE AND GET FUCKED UP YOUR FUCKING ASS BY A HUGE FUCKING DILDO WHILE SOMEONE TAKES A FUCKING SHIT IN YOUR GODDAMN MOUTH YOU PIECE OF SHIT MOTHER FUCKER! GOTTA RUIN MY FUCKING WEEK!
Noah is pretty angry at his computer.
I do not deserve to live.
WORDS CANNOT DESCRIBE MY RAGE AT THIS COMPUTER.

 

by Noahtgreat
2-01-01
Noah meets a Japanese person
Anime explosion explodes me with anger! prepare to meet your fate!
Ha Ha! You're funny as shit. I always knew japanese people talked like that!
Honor is what I must have!! Your bones will be broken! And your face!
Ha, yeah, that's funny. You're still talking all funny like anime explosion! Honor is what I must have! You are un-alive!
A nuclear bomb hits, thus rendering all racial issues Null and Void.

 

by Noahtgreat
3-03-01
Behind the Music: DEEP BLUE
ROOK TO KNIGHT'S SIX! QUEEN TO KING'S FOUR!
Deep Blue's lyrics are like, so deep
Yeah, and like, they're so poetic. Sometimes in english class I'm like, Shakespeare who, because like, I'm so into Deep Blue's groove!
To be continued...
BITCH, GET ME MY FUCKING TEQUILA!
Please sir, not another vicious beating!

 

by Noahtgreat
6-10-01
FATHER IS TURNED TO ANIMAL! TROUBLE BREWS IN THE PROCESS OF BREWING THAT TROUBLE!
MY FATHER IS TURNED TO ANIMAL!
WRONGS MUST BE RIGHTED. AND THEY WILL!
MY FATHER YOU ARE NOT! DO YOU REQUIRE VENGENCE!?
nuts?
MUSIC VIDEO EXPLOSION!
WE TAKE OUR MESSAGE TO THE STREETS!
POUNDING OUT THE FUNKY FRESH BEATS!

 

by Noahtgreat
6-15-01
ANIME EXPLOSION... IN LOVE?
TO LOVE IS TO BE HUMAN! WHO IS NOT!?
What? Baby, I think you're wack!
THIS OCEAN OF MY FEELINGS! DEEPNESS IS WHAT WOULD DESCRIBE THEM!!
What-evaaa beotch!!
LOVE IS NOT TO BE ABUSED, THE FIRE OF PASSION BURNS OUT SLOWLY AND PAINFULLY FOR THOSE WHO MOCK IT!
::Psychic Fire::
Oh my god, I'm on fire.

 

by Noahtgreat
6-15-01
The Year is 2506...
Oh man, looks like a post-apocolyptic Zombie.
Brains?
The DEAD have RISEN...
Brains? Not on MY watch!
Brains?
The "Races" are once again in harmony...
Hey baby, show me your tits!
mmm... he's got one hot Brain Stem...

 

by Noahtgreat
1-16-03
Freshman year, Day 1
Oh god....OH GOD....Two seconds and I would have had it, oh why can't I jerk off in peace!?
HEY Buuuuuuuuddy!
And I can't greet my new roommate with an errection...oh man...it's not going away...
I was thinking...TV...RIGHT THERE BuuuuuuuuuuDDY!
Problem solved....
....I don't even know what to think...
And just so you know, in my sleep I have this weird tick where I perform a handjob-like motion over and over again....weird huh?

 

by Noahtgreat
1-16-03
Can you see what I'm looking at?
No.
Good. Don't turn around for another five or ten minutes.
uhm...wait...
No, no, it's cool...I'm just...looking at porn...
So then you're NOT the person disarming the bomb upstairs from me?

 

by Noahtgreat
1-16-03
Three nights ago my dog died. He choked on the bone my grandmother gave him for christmas.
Yesterday, my grandmother died, choking on the bones of the dog I fed her for christmas...
Yeah, I know...

 

by Noahtgreat
1-16-03
Nuts!
Testicals!
you spelled testicles wrong!
and you didn't capitalize You!
Nuts!
Testicals!

 

by Noahtgreat
1-16-03
I'm not sure where this is going...
Don't look at me
Veronica... you're a dude?
actually I was upset because I spilt cheese on my shirt... but now I'm worried about you're observation skills.
no seriously look down your perfect breast are gone.
oh no you're right. oh what a world...
man I'm gonna chop off so many peoples legs

 

by Noahtgreat
1-21-03
It was a long show...
PAWN TO ROOK'S 8! QUEEN TO BISHOPS 12!
But that night, something would open my eyes...
Goddamn that was a long fucking show!
Hey, it's Deep Blue! I love your music! Will you autograph my wang?
...to the fact that I needed help....
Father! I killed a young boy when he asked me to sin!
Aaah yes, I understand completely...

 

by Noahtgreat
1-29-03
You there! I command you to terrorize the living!
Yes me lord...
And don't forget to bring something for me...ahem...personal dryness...
You there! Have you the lubrication that I seek?
Yes, yes, a thousand times yes! Who are you?

 

by Noahtgreat
1-29-03
A world in peril...
No one can now stop me, unless someone can! I have eaten the psychic fruit! Powers are mine, as is power, and SEXUAL MAGNETISM!
Look mother, the sky contains things other than its normal diverse fauna!
ANIME EXPLOSION!
TO IMPLODE WOULD BE TO IMPEDE JUSTICE! WHO ARE WE TO DO SUCH?
NO ONE!
HIS INTENTIONS WERE BENEVOLENT! HIS DEFEAT WAS NOT REQUIRED!
INSTEAD WE EXPLODE WITH VACATION! LET RELAXATION COMMENCE IN AN ORDERLY FASHION!

 

by Noahtgreat
1-27-04
Evil Machinations...
To escape martyrdom is now! Disguise is what I undertake!
ANIME EXPLOSION!!!!
A robotic mirror that follows me?? Or vicious clone?! Vengence can only be served one way! Cold! I prefer hot! It shares a first character with HONOR!
Heat is an accomplishment not worthy of me! My self esteem is low!
Your day of spawning is present! Prepare for the sacrafice of gifts!
I have come to accept old age!

 

by Noahtgreat
12-05-05
In a dark and terrible future...
Day thirty one...Still no sign of my quarry. Am suspicious of my Bee friend. Suspect betrayal.
Bzzz! He went this way.
What's this? Bee man, where did you go?? What is this cursed item before me!?
...sssshhhhhh.....
Oh no. A journey? Stay tuned for more goddamnit...
Beware traveller! You will encounter many things on your journey, including a viking disguised as a fork. Even the fork may be in disguise as something even more abstract.

 

by Noahtgreat
1-17-07
I'm glad I stole this present from the self-aware bacon.
Nothing makes me less happy than this elf stealing my present!
And I shall never, ever return it. Not ever!
Happy MLK Day!
Sorry, MEAT gets no presents.
You wouldn't be saying that if I were turkey bacon! RACISM!

 

by Noahtgreat
1-17-07
Look down! At your weiner!
...
SERIOUSLY!
no, thanks though.
See what has happened now?!
Not at all.

 

by Noahtgreat
7-22-07
The year is 1375...
Will my husband ever come back from this...CIVIL WAR??
That was a long walk back from war.
My husband. Once away at civil war! Now, here at hand!
It is true. I have come home. And I am smaller, and made of plastic.
AND SO IT WAS.
You will require less food as a result of your transformation.
This will be a boon in the harsh winters to come.

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