All comics by Project_Spam

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by Project_Spam
7-13-03
The unsuspecting farmer is inside a cave...
Mwahahaha! I shall eat you, old man.
What's this?!?!
You have NOWHERE to run!
Hehehe. It appears that the joke is on you... As you can see, half of my body is as large as your whole!!!!
... And your point is... ?
Well, I think I'll be on my merry little way now...

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
Billy is just taking a nice walk through town...
Hehehehehe! Haha hehe hah! He he hoo!
Woo ah! Do you wanna fight? Wa!
Heheheha! Heh! hehehe hoo hahaha! Woo-hoo hehehe! LOLOLOLOL! ROFLMAO! Heehehe, heh!
Um, hey dude, shut up.
Mwehehehe hahaha! *Garble* Hehehe hahaha! *Snort* Hahahaha... heh... Um, hah?
=P

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
As you can see, this is the Mystery Science Theater from MST3k.
Now there are inhabitants in the chairs. However, it's not the usual Mike, Servo, and Crow viewing a movie. Rather, it's Block Man, Chicken Wuss, and Dr. Wily, who had to diss something else...
Oh, man, what have we done to have to stand this s***?
Today they had to suffer through and make fun of Project Spam's lame jokes and dialogue found within his comics.
I'd give anything to see Final Sacrifice right now. Manos: Hands of Fate, anyone?

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
Woo.
Haha, what? "Woo"? Heh, when in doubt, woo.
I love wooing. Woo-hoo!
Woo! Neener!
WOO.
Why don't we just leave it as "Wooner"?

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
An internet coversation between two people who are "going out" (yet haven't met each other). This is Keith.
ican olny drem of u at nite, my gurl. how i lie in your arms at nite, staring at da sky/stars with u.iluv u
yor lips speaksoft sweetness your lips a kewl caress.! im lost in your magic'my hart beets w/ your chest. plz plz plz PLZ dont leave me kristen. i luv u and always will> ;)
And this.. this THING is his "girlfriend", Kristen!!! o_0
Awwwe,, that"s so sweet of u, my studly b/f. ;) am i booty-ful? teehe i luv u. let's meettonite in a smoking section/ restraunt in gorgia.i kno its a few states awaybut welive in diff states...

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
Ah! Who said that?!?
Greetings. I am Invisible Man.
I'll let you in on a little secret...
Please... spare me... (Sniff)
Tell... tell me the (sniff) secret you have. I'd be delighted to hear it...
(Hehe, I'm not wearing any underwear)

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
I... LIKE... SQUIRRELS...
BUT I'M IN A MURDEROUS MOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SQUIRREL... GO BYE-BYE

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
Face my wrath Mega Man!
Hi Dr. Wily, my nemesis. What evil plan do you have for me to thwart today?
Um... hello?

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
Jimmy (left) always wanted to be cool.
Hey man! I'm Cloud Strife of Final Fantasy VII fame!
No, you're most definitely not.
Don't I look like him?
Look, Cloud wasn't some weak fifteen-year-old loser wearing a shirt that changes with his every mood change. The same hair color and style doesn't always cut it.
But look! He hung around fields and open areas like this, fighting monsters with his buddies!
My point exactly. The Cloud we knew actually had friends.

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
I'm feeling exceptionally dastardly on this fine noon.
I could set this forest on fire, but that seems too cliché.
I know! I'll go pluck the chicken... hehehe.

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
You should go bid $237 USD on a Saito plush toy on eBay.
You freak. Why would you spend so much money on something so trivial? I mean, Saito's one fo the coolest characters ever and all, but...
Well, you WERE the one who bought that David Bowie keychain that was home printed for 25 smackaroos.
Hey! I didn't know it was homemade! Plus, I wasn't the one who bought the Konami Dance Pad with flashing lights for $100.
Yeah, well... DDR's cool.
Freak.

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
It's too late... I've killed myself.
Wait, what's this? "I love you"
Kids who are suicidal, I hope this teaches you something. I don't know what, but it means a lot for me to make a difference in someone's life. Thanks guys!!! (sniff)
;_; I am loved...

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
Walking...
*grunt*
Still walking...
*grunt*
Um.. now he's lost...
WHERE'S DA CHEEEEEZE???

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
Moo.
I cannot comprehend. Either what you said was too simple or too complex for me to understand. Send feedback anytime by typing "feedback" followed by your comment or suggestion. Tell more gossip.
Moo?!?
I cannot comprehend. Either what you said was too simple or too complex for me to understand. Please rephrase your sentence.
G****** it b****. Do you know nothing??? F*** you and your stupid f******' creator!!!!
Indeed.

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
Teacher: I will award all you students with an 'A' a smiley face sticker!
::Gasp::
::Gasp::
I WANT THE YELLOW ONE!!!
I WANT THE YELLOW ONE!!!
Teacher: I will award all you students with an 'A' a smiley face!
OMG!!! WE SAID THE SAME THING!!! ::GASP:: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ::GASP:: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! :GASP::
OMG!!! WE SAID THE SAME THING!!! ::GASP:: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ::GASP:: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! :GASP::

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
Enter the psycho world Chucky and I created!!
OOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Oh... so you're not affected...
Hah! Ha... How strange... you are.

 

by Project_Spam
7-13-03
Have you played SaGa Frontier for the ol' PS1?
Actually, no I haven't.
Then I can't tell you the joke I just made up.
What was it about?
Stuff from SaGa Frontier, moron.
Oh, right...

 

by Project_Spam
7-14-03
Singing...
I believe in miracles... Where you from, you sexy thing? (You sexy thing, you)
I believe in miracles, since you came alooooooong! You sexy thing...
You talkin' to me?
Where did you come from bay-beh... How did you know, I needed you? How did you know, I needed you so badly? Yesterday, I was one of the lonely people, now you're lyin' close to me, makin' love to me!
... I must say, I AM flattered.

 

by Project_Spam
7-14-03
Ihre Mutter ist so fett, daß sie hinter das Fernsehen geht und Sie das Ganzerscheinen vermissen.
Wie trauen sagen Sie das? Ihre Mutter ist wie die Spielhalle: zwei Euro pro Benutzung
Ihre Mamma ist wie ein Vakuum - sie saugt, brennt durch, und erhält in den Wandschrank gelegt.
Halt die Schnauze!
Ha, die Wahrheit kam heraus.
Gut weiß ich nicht DASS viel über Ihre Mutter.

 

by Project_Spam
7-14-03
Hi. I'm Gabe, as you know.
What you don't know, however, is that I'm a chronic sociopath.
There's no punchline to this strip. Just thought I'd let you know.

 

by Project_Spam
7-14-03
Hey, little girl. May I interest you in some Nike products?
If it's anything like your shirt, I don't wear Nike.
No, no, no, you don't wear this kind.
Huh?
In this bag is BOOOZE! I got B00Z3!
...

 

by Project_Spam
7-14-03
HOW ARE YOU GENTLEMAN?
Um... Fine, thanks...
ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US.
Uh... I'm just a passenger, heh.
YOU HAVE NO CHANCE TO SURVIVE MAKE YOUR TIME. HA HA HA HA.
What you say? Surely, you can't mean that I must move zig...

 

by Project_Spam
7-25-03
!!!
Hahaha. Die die die.

 

by Project_Spam
7-25-03
Whoa, whoa... Slow down there, buddy! Where are you goin'?
Can't you tell I'm delivering a flag???
Delivering a flag? To whom? To what? WHY?
Shut up! I've gotta, uh, get there in a hurry!?!
Why are you being so mean?
Well, um, no one has ever really ASKED what I was doing before...

 

by Project_Spam
7-29-03
Ooh, I so wanna beat the shizzy out of that girl...
I need to control my anger every once in a while, though. But that smile's so.. annoying.... Ah, forget it!
So, um, wanna die?
No, thank you!

 

by Project_Spam
7-29-03
D***! (What was that, what was that??! Now she knows I want to get rid of her!!!)
Ha! I can read your mind too! Hee hee hee!
You... can read minds... too?
Yep! Hee hee!
Jeez. Kill me now.
Okay! Tee-hee!

 

by Project_Spam
7-29-03
Oh, that's just fine and dandy. I gave her an idea.
Yes! Hehehehe!
Hmmm... ... ... ... ...
... ... ... ... ... ... ... You're plotting my death right now, aren't you?
Uh-huh! ::girly laugh::

 

by Project_Spam
7-29-03
Hmm...
Tee-hee!
CENSORED
*Doink*
GAAAH!!!
Much better! Tee-hee! *giggles*

 

by Project_Spam
7-29-03
!!!
Oh no!!!
I'VE TRANSMOGRIFIED!!!!
Haha! In yo face, snow-dawg!

 

by Project_Spam
7-30-03
Hmm... I feel bored today.
Maybe I can think of a devious robotic creation to put an end to Mega Man and his puny creator!!!
Dr. Wily, hard at work
Uh-huh, put this here and there, and right... Things are going as planned!
World, I have unveiled my new creation!
Greetings, Paper Clip Man! Go wreak some havoc!!! Muhahahaha!
Time to go fasten some papers! Heh, they'll never know what him 'em...

 

by Project_Spam
7-30-03
Why are you winking at me?
I'm not. My left eyelid is glued to my skin.
Oh, sure. Like you expect me to believe that. You know I'm your hero. But...
Quit talking to me!
... You are the wind beneath my wings!!!

 

by Project_Spam
7-31-03
Y'know, sometimes I wonder whether or not there is other life in the universe.
Hmm...
I mean, why would all life be confined to this one puny planet?
For some reason, I feel like all of my questions have been answered. I feel strange; like I've been abducted by some alien force.
Greetings, my silly new guinea pigs.

 

by Project_Spam
8-06-03
Gah! I am spooky!
Oh, yeah right. Shut up. I've seen worse things.
Boo!
Ahh!
Y'iknow what, you're right...

 

by Project_Spam
8-07-03
Why, hello there, Bill. I'm Donny the Hadrosaur and I'm drinking tea. How may I serve you?
Um... what?
BLARG!!!
I've gotta be drunk... right? After all this beer, I've gotta be drunk, right... ? Please tell me I am...
Billy, snap out of it, my son! You're in big trouble! You shouldn't be drinking!!
Agh! It's gotten worse, even though I am now in a sober state!

 

by Project_Spam
8-08-03
There ya go... Oh yeah...
OW!!!
Harder!
I think my suicide attempt is working... I hate being in jail...
No, you need to go harder. Jeez, why don't you just die already?

 

by Project_Spam
8-08-03
Yo, I'm real artsy, yo.
Squawk! Squawk!
Well, I'm real hungry, yo!
Ahhh! Oh no! I'm going to be eaten!
Gobble gobble gobble... ! Does that frighten you at all? Hee hee!

 

by Project_Spam
8-15-03
You blinked.
Drat.

 

by Project_Spam
8-15-03
LET US START A REVOLUTION, HORTON. ONE THAT WILL SPAN ACROSS CENTURIES AS THEY WILL KNOW THE MIGHT OF OUR CULT!
I agree, Mr. Reaper.
WE SHALL TAKE THE LIVES OF MANY INNOCENT FOOLS. OUR FULL POWER THEY WILL KNOW NOT; FOR OUR TRUE POWER IS...
... Love?
NO, HORTON, YOU DIP$%#@.
I shall have no part of your "cult" then. I would instead rather sprinkle the planet with flowers. Flowers! Pretty, pretty flowers... !

 

by Project_Spam
9-11-03
I'm not talking to you any more!
Heh, fine with me.
Agh! What the fu** are you doing?

 

by Project_Spam
9-25-03
Hey dude, I know that I am so funny! I know you'll think I'm funny!
Um... okay...
Here's a joke (giggles): Why did a random bird explode one day???
What are you trying to accomplish... ?
And thus another pointless comic comes to a stunning conclusion!
There's no answer! I just thought I knew that it would make you laugh... erm yeah...
You know nothing, kid. You're pathetic.

 

by Project_Spam
9-25-03
There could be life on the moon, but I doubt it.
Whoa! Doubt no more!
What's goin' on, foreign life form?
Word, G.

 

by Project_Spam
9-26-03
Too bad this wasn't even dubbed.

 

by Project_Spam
9-29-03
Must... liberate... my friends...
I must... extricate... the people
Wait! When did I arrive in the plains!!??
... How come I always get lost whenever I'm on an important mission?

 

by Project_Spam
10-09-03
So tell me, why are you here?
Well, simply put, I'd like to inform the nation that I will be running for President of the United States!!
...
I can make a difference! Really, I can!
Get outta here!
Well, you can't get much worse than George W., so I don't see what your problem is...

 

by Project_Spam
10-09-03
Hey man, listen; I was over at the pyrotechnics show the other day. Good stuff, dude. It was awesome.
Oh really? It looked cool. I didn't feel like going, though.
Oh man, was it AWESOME! Fire kicks, man. You should've tagged along.
Yeah, that's too bad for me. I regret missing it.
... Hold that thought! You spontaneously combusted!!! Who needs pyrotechnics?!? This is tight!!!

 

by Project_Spam
10-19-03
Hi, you redneck. What the dilly-o are you doing here?
Whadda yoo want, yoo silly homo???
You're in my airspace, a-hole!
Don't talk tuh me like that, foo!!!
Why not, b****??
'Cause I gotta gun, dips***.

 

by Project_Spam
10-20-03
BLAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGG!!!
!!
What was that!!?
Oh... it was just you...
(Hic!) Want some?

 

by Project_Spam
10-29-03
Ahh, there's nothing more satisfying than knowing that Halloween is right around the corner.
And nothing symbolizes the occasion better than your standard jack-o-lantern.
I shall eat you!!!
AAH! I think it's time for me to flee!

 

by Project_Spam
10-29-03
CAFFEINE CAFFEINE!
I'VE HAD TOO MUCH CAFFEINE! WHEE!
EEH! CAFFEINE! MWEEHEEHEEHAHA!
Really, could you have made it any more obvious?

 

by Project_Spam
10-29-03
Hey! This is Project_Spam's fiftieth comic! Do you know what that means???
Hmm... Aha!
It means that this is his fiftieth comic! Uh, yeah! Woo!
Erg! When will that Project_Spam dude ever get a life?!?

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