All comics by SPORGASM

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by SPORGASM
2-09-04
AND THEN WHEN SHIT HAPPENED
My names Roman!
Nobody cares
and more to come
But I HAVE OPINIONS THAT MATTER!
DUDE Shut up all you talk is shit
then a revelation ROMANS AN IDIOT WAIT A SECOND THATS NOT A REVEALTION THATS COMMON KNOWLEDGE
shut up you think your smarter than everyone but youre not!!!!!
That was "so" smart i think you should write that down *wink wink* (Roman doesnt get its sarcasm)

 

by SPORGASM
2-09-04
look im tate, im fat stupid and i smell funny
im lindsey - i hate ur guts u copying bitch
i know how to play the bass
and im barbara strisand
so there
shank

 

by SPORGASM
2-09-04
Munko: I MUI BAXX0R3D
Curt: I AM MR POOPY AND I AM TANKED IN GARBAJ KAN!
KURTIZ GIM DOLLARZ 4 B33R
I H4V3Z NO KASH! ME SPEND ON B00Z
BILLZ4R I = MUI BAXX0R
I GO1NG 2 QFC U WANT B33|2 Y3Z?!?!?!?!? xfer KEKE

 

by SPORGASM
2-09-04
im sk00t33
im roman, am i k00 yet? i wanna be like eminem
shut up roman DONT DUMB
IM COOL THO! IM A RAPPA IM K00!
im tate IM INTO FUNKY BUTT LOVING
o0o GIMME buttseks lolol I WANT U IN TEH BUTToX TYTYTYTY

 

by SPORGASM
2-09-04
LATER AT THE COMSTORIUM
IM MATT HILDRETH
Shut up Hildreth
HILDRETH SERIOUSLY
Im MATT Hildreth
IM FUCKING OUT OF HERE
FUCK HILDRETH
I WANT MAYA Because IM MATT HILDRETH

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
Char Sheet One
I'M RORY.
I'M BILL.
Char Sheet Two
I'M MATT HILDRETH.
I'M GEDDY.
Char Sheet Three
I'M SCOTT.
I'M ROMAN.

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
Char Sheet Four
I'M LIND-Z.
I'M TATIANNA.
Char Sheet Five
I'M JORDAN.
I'M FESTER.
Char Sheet Six
I'M MAJA.
I'M AVERY... *touch touch*

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
I'M MATT HILDRETH, SO DATE ME.
...OTAY.
I'M MATT HILDRETH. BY THE WAY I ALMOST DON'T HAVE A GIRLFRIEND I THINK.
...OTAY.
I'M MATT HI-
...WAIT WHAT.

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
AND THEN A DUMBASS APPEARED
Lets make a PRANK PHONE CALL TO SCOTT
SUDDENLY AT LINDSEYS
Hello?
Hey This is ROMAN wheres Scott?
MAN THEY ARE DUMBASSES
This isnt Roman I know his Voice DUMBASS
SHIT SHE ONTO US!! *HANGUP*

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
SOONER OR LATER
Hey RORY Im poor give me money for Netplay(tm)
FINE but you better pay me back
LATER
Rory give me MONEY for net play IM POOR
OK BUT PAY OR I COLLECT YOUR LEFT TESTICLE
EVEN LATER AT THE WAR
GIVE ME MONEY FOR PIZZA BITCH
FUCK YOU

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
At 3 am, a cop pulled 2 random people over
I'm Geddy, bitch
I'm a cop and I'm frowning, not smiling and I want u to fuckin go home!
Why u being a fag man?
Go Home it's 3 am!
Cops are fags
My Favorite movie is Reservoir Dogs!!
I'm drunk, lets get a donut.

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
At the Hell House...
Hi I'm gonna elbow u in the stomach
AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
How about i pour vodka on u and light a match?
Ow...
oops

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
This sux
The Animator should die
Metaphorically speaking

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
JORDAN WHINES
FUCK THIS IM CHANGING CHARACTERS
ILL change you WHEn I GET AROUND TO IT BITCH
AND WHINES SOME MORE GEDDY 1337 HAXOR
HERE WE GO!!!!!!!!!!1 <----- I HATE THOSE
OWW MY INSIDES THEY'RE TURNING INSIDE OUT
WTF JORDANs EVIL
HEY JORDAN YOU'RE DIFFERENT
SHUT UP AND GIVE ME YOUR MONEY

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
Wanna SEX?
OK

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
IM MATT HILDRETH
NO IM MATT HILDRETH
WTF
BUT IM MATT HILDRETH
THEn MATT HILDRETH IS OUTTA HERE
BACK IN THE REAL WORLD
THIS COMIC DIDNT MAKE SENsE DIPSHIT
I WAS FUCKING BORED

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
Lorraine failed me shit!
Dude that sucks what did you do to her?
I FUCKING KILLED HER
WAS THAT REALLY NESSESCARY I MEaN SHE IS LITTLE LIKE ZIEG HEIL BUT YOU DIDNT REALLY HAVE TO KILL HER DID YOU?
I DONT KNOW WHAT DO YOU THINK HILDRETH
IM MATT HILDRETH

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
Lindsey do you have any words of encouragement for our readers?
Stay away from Tatianna OR SHE WILL COPY YOU
and dont do drugs
BILL AND RORY SAME QUESTION?
KILL EVERY ONE WHO PISSES YOU OFF *shank*
AND AlWAYS FILM IT
HILDRETH ANY WORDs BEFORE I KILL YOU?
I HAVE A PLANE AND A JOB AND "GIRLFRIEND"
are you ever goanna feature me???? >_< (KAWAII)

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
SCOTT QUIT USING YOUR LAPTOP.
...
IN MY OPINION YOU ARE A FUCKING CUNT.
I'M EMILY BENDER DON'T SAY THAT WORD.
IN MY OPINION YOU ARE A FUCKING CUNT.

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
NO WAY IN HELL I COULD TOP THAT LAST COMIC
IN Regards to the author of the previous comic i just bow and say you are the greatest

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
yo vinnie
yo
whats ur bands name?
.........
................

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
EARLIER THIS EVENING
GEDDY YOU SUCK YOURE GAY YOUR OPINIONS DONT MATTER YOUR NOT SMARTER THAN OTHERS YOU LIKE GAY MUSIC AND STUFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
Im not even going to acknowledge that
AND ROMAN CONTINUES
YOU GAY< YOU SUCK AND ARE GAY WITH RORY MY MUSIC SENSE IS BETTER THAN YOURS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
Dude I say what I say so people have no illusions that they are smart
LOOK AT THIS its boobies (.)(.)
KICK MY ASS GEDDY KICK IT OR KILL ME OR WHAT EVER BLAHBLAHABLAHBLAHBLAHB *MONOTONE RANTING CNTINUES FOR LONG TIME*
GO AWAY FOREVER

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
I KNOW! I'LL MAKE A COMIC THAT WILL MOST DEFINENTLY MAKE GEDDY SHIT HIS PANTS!!
HMM... EGO IS A PRETTY NICE WORD DESCRIBING IT ALL.
"GEDDY, EGO SO BIG MAKE FALL DOWN BUTT SEX WITH SCOTT!"
MAN, YOU SURE DO LIKE WALKING IN TO THIS CRAP, DON'T YOU.

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
ICH VILT NEIN MEIN LAMEN!
BILL, YOUR GERMAN SUCKS. I'M BETTER THAN YOU AT BEING GERMAN.
...WELL, WHAT CAN *YOU* SAY?
...
...
du hast mich

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
HEY COLLEEN, WANNA GO ON A DATE?
ok
HEY RORY! I JUST ASKED COLLEEN ON A DATE, WANNA COME?
ok
GOOD, BECAUSE HAVING SOMEONE I'M ACTUALLY ATTRACTED TO IS GOING TO HELP.

 

by SPORGASM
2-10-04
SCOTT, MAKE FUN OF GEDDY.
INSTEAD OF REMIXING MY COMICS.
You're blocked.

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
i play bass
i play ba-
NOBODY GIVES A SHIT.

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
IM EMILY BENDER AND I HATE BILL'S CAR, AND I WONDER WHY HE CUSSES ME OUT
You do realize that you hold grudges way too long right? Im trying to make a truce here...
HMMPH! IM NOT TALKING TO YOU BECAUSE U INSULTED ME AND IM AN IMMATURE BITCH THAT HAS TO RELY ON OLDER MEN FOR SEX AND ATTENTION
I'm going to ignore that last comment...the point being that im trying to make the peace.
Oh get over it you cock-craving, bi-polar, grudge-holding sadistic retarded fucking whore!
OMG OMG OMG IM NOT GOING TO TALK TO YOU FOR ANOTHER 3 MONTHS FOR THAT ONE BOOOOOOHHHHFUCKINGHOOOOOOOO!!!WAHWAHWAHWAHWAH!!! IMA GO CRY ABOUT IT AND NOT TALK TO YOU

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
DUHHH IM ROMAN....UHHHHH *DROOLS*
IM MATT HILDRETH, IVE LOST MY WOMAN, SUNK INTO A LOVING STATE OF DEPRESSION, AND IM GOING TO SULK ABOUT IT UNTIL SOMEONE PAYS ATTENTION TO ME...
"UHHH I WILL HELP U IN ANY WAY I..."*whispers*whats this word here??
I CANT HANDLE IT ANYMORE! GOOD BYE CRUEL....OWWWW IT BURRRRNNNNSSS...that? thats "any"...
OH RIGHT..."I WILL HELP YOU IN ANY WAY I...CA...CAN..."
SHUT UP ROMAN. ILL KILL YOU AND ME, ILL DO IT MAN, ILL DO IT! I SWEAR IT*SHANKS BOTH* -The world is now rid of two pains in the ass-

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
Roman you are so fucking dumb!
I hate Tattianna!
(.)(.)
IN MY OPINION YOU'RE A FUCKING CUNT!
GEDDY YOU SUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
I PLAY BASS
FUCK EMILY

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
HELLO IM ROMAN!
I WANT YOUR BODY
OO BABY YOU GET ME SO HOT!!!!!1
THE MORAL IS NEVER EVER WORK FOR A PHONE SEX LINE OR ELSE YOU WILL FOREVER HAVE TO LISTEN TO ROMAN EVERY DAY
ROMAN WHY IS THERE $700 WORTH OF GAY ANUS PLEASURE FOR YOU ON YOUR PHONE BILL
NO REASON *CHARGES IT*

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
I LIKE GAY SEX
I LIKE GAY SEX
I LIKE GAY SEX
SHUT THE FUCK UP RETARD YOU FUCKING HIPOCRIT

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
Dumbness will always be with roman...
Dude, Roman u need to shut up before we get evil jordan to shoot u.
a buuuuuuuuuh?
Like skin on fried chicken
Roman quit ur idiot ways before i kill u
...........
The Moral of the story is... DON'T DUMB
Shaddup?
A-......?

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
Hildreth does a greeting;
Oblastoff!!! I'm Matt Hildreth!
Hildreth, you pole smoker....
Very poorly responds;
Hey, I'm Matt Hildreth, and I've been sober for two weeks!
That's...nice. Actually, that confirms my statement....
And makes Jordan look smarter...again.
I'm Matt Hildreth! I like it here....
Yep, skin-flute player.

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
Roman was born DUMB contrary to what he believes and starting in Balerina school in the early years
I WANT GAY SEX WITH A TURTLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND EMENIEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
OK HONEY
ROMANS FAMILY ALWAYS NEW HE WAS DESTINED FOR GREATNESS BUT THEY WERE NEVER RIGHT
Can I be in the school play pleez?
Definately NOT bitch GO HAM I MEAN HOME YOUVE HAD ENOUGH HAM
AND THEN HE GREW UP BUT NOT MUCH CHANGED (FUCKING DAMBASS)
DATE ME PLEASE
FUCK NO!

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
WELL ROMANS LIFE CONTIUED TO SUCK UNTIL ONE DAY
WILL YOU SEX ME PLEASE
SURE HONEY JUST GIVE ME FOUR DOLLARS
ROMAN HAD DISCOVERED HOOKERS HIS LIFE WOULD NEVER BE THE SAME
WHERE DO YOU WANT IT?
PERFERABLY IN THE BUTT PLEASE
THINGS WENT THIS UNTIL ONE DAY
YOU WANT TO SEX ME FOR MONEY
IM A COP AND YOURE UNDER ARREST FOR CHILD MOLESTATION AND PURCHASE OF SEXUAL ACTS BITCH

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
Jordan tries...
Hey, my phone number. charge, your number; oh, yeah....
Damn, why are they drop dead sexy bassists always so dumb?
...to get help...
Lindsey, hook me up with your friends.
Um...no.
...and fails...in Russian....
What are you looking for?
*sigh* Ìîå äîñòîèíñòâî.

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
I am learning to play bass
you'll never be as good as me u crippled retard
(fire spell)
Aaaah!
Hey Roman, I'm gonna play bass
Why's Rory gonna play a fish?

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
ROMAN RECIEVED IT UP THE ASS ALL NIGHT FOR SIX YEARS UNTIL HE GOT OFF FOR GOOD BEHAVIOR
WHY DONT WE EVER TALK?
WANNA SMELL THIS FINGER
ROMAN WENT BACK TO HIS OLD ACTS SHORTLY AFTER SUCKING GENTLEMAN OFF FOR MONEY SO HE COULD GO BUY MORE PROSTITUTES
*sucky sucky* *squeeky squeeky*
OO SO GOOD
BUT SOON HE WENT BACK TO PRISON
WHERE DO U WANT IT THIS TIME BITCH?
LET ME THINK, HMMM, THE BUTT

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
yo avery
yo rory
why'd ya break up with kelli daddy-o?
cuz this guy wanted her

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
I WOULD LIKE TO RETRACT THE PREVIOUS COMICS ENTITLED "ROMANS STORY PARTS 1 THROUGH THREE"
BECAUSE ID GET SUED IF I DIDNT

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
MATT HILDRETH SAYS YOU SHOULD GET A JOB AND EARN MONEY
JUST LIKE HILDRETH BECAUSE EVERYTHING HILDRETH SAYS IS LAW
MATT HILDRETH HAS TWENTIE WOMEN AT HIS BECON CALL
SHUT THE FUCK UP HILDRETH

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
i got some nails
right here buddy!
nails here.....hammer....*turns book* there?
im waiting! cum onnnn! my fat cheeks are waitin!
come to think of it, i think ill keep these for myself...
aww come on bitch! i want it in there NOW!

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
The key to a good comic is definently CONSITENCY. You all don't seem to understand. Character definitions are created with various catch phrases. For instance, "I'M MATT HILDRETH" is a good one.
Saying "UR" and "U" are just other ways of showing that YOU ARE ALL FUCKING MORONS. Also, it seems to me that none of you can stick to proper characters. For instance, originally...
Hildreth was a lizard in a suit. Now he's a guy hamming nails into his head? Talk about retardation, I'm outta here.
i'm matt hildreth and u r all dumb lol!!! *fire spell*

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
Hey Bill is really pissed at you and i cant undertand why
BLAHBLAHBLAH CAR BLAHBLAHBLAGBLAG
Hey Bill is really pissed at you and i cant undertand why
BLAHBLAHBLAH CAR BLAHBLAHBLAGBLAG
Hey Bill is really pissed at you and i cant undertand why
BLAHBLAHBLAH CAR BLAHBLAHBLAGBLAG

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
WHY THE FUCK IS BILL SO MAD AT YOU
BLAH BLAH BLAH CAR BLAH BLAH
WOW YOU REALLY ARE BI-POLAR HARDCORE ARENT YOU?
YES!!!! AND THE MEDICATION DOES NOTHING
30 minutes later
WOW That was good sex wasnt it?
Eh it was ok

 

by SPORGASM
2-11-04
DAYS AGO
I DONT WANT TO BE THE GAY GUY WITH THE CAT I WANT TO BE THE CAT/WIZARD/STEVIE NICKS
WELL HOW BOUT I MAKE YOU THE SLIME YOU WHINY BITCH
I DONT WANNA BE THE SLIME *POUTING* IF IM NOT A COOL CHARACTER IM LEAVING
WELL YOU DONT HAVE TO WHINE ABOUT IT YOU BIG GIRL HERE WE GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 <--------------I HATE THOSE
NOW YOU KNOW THE REST OF THE STORY
HEY JORDAN YOURE DIFFERENT
SHUT UP AND GIVE ME YOUR MONEY

 

by SPORGASM
2-12-04
matt why do u think ur better than everyone else?
I'm Matt Hildreth, and i have more money than everyone, thats why I'm better than everyone
It's not cool, your pissing everyone off daddy-o
I don't care, I'll just buy some new friends. Did I mention that I'm Matt Hildreth?
You wanna get a taco?
Sure, I'm Matt Hildreth

 

by SPORGASM
2-12-04
Umm...I got nothin....

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