Tinman  

Still, there is a bright side to the destruction of my theme park.

Really?

Yes. I now have about 12 tons of what could be called 'chargrilled beef jerky' once the shrapnel is removed lying in a burnt retail park in London.

Of course, why bother removing the shrapnel when you could just sell it to African governments at a vastly inflated rate as foreign aid?

By Jove! We could sell it on the basis that if you drink water after eating it, it's more filling!

And the genius part is - they don't even have any water!