All comics by boohiss

 

You can use any software you want, as long as its made by MS by boohiss 1-16-03
You must use IE to make comics!!! CONFORM! God damn talking paper clips...	You must use Word in order for people to read your resume!!! CONFORM! What the...	You must, you must, you must increase your bust!!! CONF...oh forget it... You know, he's got a point...

 

Dude, where's my William Blake? by boohiss 1-17-03
And what shoulder, and what art, Could twist the sinews of thy heart, ...	And when thy heart began to beat, What dread hand? and what dread feet? Are you guys hearing this?	Dude, that was William Blake. Look, I don't need to hear any more of your fruity white rap lyrics, okay?

 

Tightening the belt by boohiss 1-17-03
Boohiss meets with his manager at work... Uh, boohiss, we are tightening the belt around here, due to the economy and our slow business and all... Right, sure, that make sense.	So, uh, we are going to have to cut your salary in half, take away your PC, and also we need to sell your pants on eBay. ...	Do I still get the complimentary kick in the nads every morning though? Oh, that goes without saying. We aren't THAT heartless.

 

All in a day's work by boohiss 1-18-03
Let's see, so far I've vandalized the Church, threw bricks at old ladies, pushed babies in front of traffic, spilled barrels of toxic waste at the school...	...chased rabbits on my dirtbike, stolen pokemon cards from 5 year olds, tossed some cats off of a bridge, put a bunch of nails on the highway, deflated the tires on some ambulances...	...but I've got this nagging feeling that I forgot something... Don't forget to start DDoS'ing dal.net!

 

Boohiss and the new apartment by boohiss 1-19-03
So, what do you think of your new apartment so far? Well...	The carpet is crunchy and stained, theres a bullet hole in that window, the lights only come on half the time, and my fiancee refuses to visit me here...	But other than that, I hate it.

 

American What? by boohiss 1-22-03
Okay, so a british guy, a fat black guy, and a washed up singer sit in a room, right? ...	Then, like 6000 people come in one by one to belt out the most awful songs you can imagine and get insulted for it, right? Er, okay...	And then they show Bridezilla commercials!! Isn't it great!! That sounds fine, as long as you'e willing to clean up the mess after my head explodes.

 

We'll call you... by boohiss 1-25-03
Timmy interviews for a Software Development Corporation. Okay. So, it says here you have experience with computer programming. Yes.	So, do you have any familiarity with C, C++, Visual Basic, Java, Delphi, or what? No, none of those.	NONE? Er, so, what kind of programming experience DO you have? Uh, I'm pretty good with Photoshop, and I use Windows XP *PROFESSIONAL* edition. Oh yeah, and I'm good at Quake.

 

Because even computer programmers need a comic strip. by boohiss 1-28-03
You saw Vin Diesel in "The Fast and the Furious!" I live my life one quarter-mile at a time!	You loved him in "Triple xXx!" I live my life one extreme stunt at a time!	Now experience Vin Diesel starring in "Machine Language Revenge," coming Summer 2003! I live my life one opcode at a time!

 

Final Destination 2, by Douglas Adams by boohiss 2-02-03
So, did you like the movie? The first part was the worst.	The second part, well, it was the worst too. The third part I didn't enjoy at all...	A simple "yes" or "no" will do, MARVIN. After that, the movie went into a bit of a decline.

 

Anna by boohiss 2-16-03
Boohiss tries to have a conversation with an artificially intelligent IRC bot named Anna... How are you today, Anna? Ummm... all of them?	Please keep in mind, these are actual quotes from Anna. Uh, what? I don't understand. Have you ever been to Europe? Do you like the climate in Atlanta?	No, really. I think I broke her. I will tell my friend you said I am creator is <{}> who. Hello. bing!

 

More senseless, but enjoyable, French bashing. by boohiss 2-24-03
Est-ce que j'une pastèque, comment peut moi suis- vous aider? Uh, hello, do you speak English?	Yes, sir, I do. How can I help you? Yeah, what about German? do you speak German?	Hehehe, no, just English and French... Gee, I wonder why...

 

Carpet Seller by boohiss 2-27-03
Okay, so what's your idea for a video game? Okay, so like, in this game, you sell carpets! You can design the patterns and colors on the carpet, and the better it looks, the more money you can sell it for.	When you get money you can either buy new and better colors, or you can buy knowledge about how to make nicer patterns.	http://www.gamediscovery.com/category/2001/february/other/carpet-seller.html I'm sorry I asked. To finish the game, you have to make The Ultimate Pattern. This is the finest pattern possible, and with the most beatiful color-combination.

 

History will be kind. by boohiss 3-13-03
"One ought never to turn one's back on a threatened danger...But if you meet it promptly and without flinching, you will reduce the danger by half." Warmonger!	"Those who can win a war well can rarely make a good peace and those who could make a good peace would never have won the war." The Middle East is none of our business! No blood for oil! You are such a hate-filled warmongering imperialist, George W Bush!	George W What? My name's Winston Churchill. Who?

 

Different guy, same joke. by boohiss 3-14-03
What if Saddam Hussein fails to comply, and we fail to act? He will conclude that the international community has lost its will. He will then conclude that he can go right on and do more to rebuild an arsenal of devastating destruction.	Some day, some way, I guarantee you, he'll use the arsenal. We simply cannot allow that to happen. There is no more clear example of this threat than Saddam Hussein.	This isn't about Saddam! It's about warmongering and oil! I hate you, George W Bush! You got the wrong guy, son. My name is Bill Clinton.

 

Barrels of Fun by boohiss 3-28-03
Now for news on the war in Iraq...	Eyewitnesses have reported Iraqi soldiers in full chem suits loading barrels onto trucks today.	No word yet on what may be in the barrels. WELL IT AIN'T FRIGGIN KOOL AID!

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