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CAPTAIN jared? i don't think he was called CAPTAIN jared asswipe, and i'm the narrator, i know these things!!
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| captain doughnut? what kind of name is that? are you a real super hero? i bet you have a giant hard on right now. | |
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| well, i'm like captain jared from subway, except I got all buff eating doughnuts. and that depends on what you mean by REAL superhero. and no, i am not aroused, but umm...thanks for asking? | |
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| well, i know when I was a superhero, i always had a chubby. it's the trademark of every good hero. you DO know it's illegal to pretend to be a superhero, right? | |
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| HEY, i just saved this whole city!! err, well, they DID kill everybody, and umm, burn..all...the...houses...down. oh god, I SUCK! but not having an erection doesn't mean i'm not a superhero, does it? | |
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Our hero flies to the capital to tell the president what happened...
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| and your name was...captain doughnut? OHHH...a smart guy, eh...well, that's it, i'm writing you a ticket for impersonating a superhero! | |
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