All comics by dramamine_addict

 

the strokes are dumb by dramamine_addict 7-16-02
a disertation on the strokes hey, have you heard of this band the strokes? they're totally amazing! you really think so?	psssh! yeah! they're totally original and bring back the sounds of bands like television, the velvet underground and the rolling stones. they sound just like them, man, and it totally rocks my face!!! don't you think it would be easier to buy music by those bands than to pay for some cd by a glossed over MTV market machine that's just cashing in on a fad?	uh....well....hmmm....their clothes are really fucking cool.....DUDE, THE FUCKING STRRRROOOOOOOOKESSS!!!!!! YOWZA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i will now peck your eyes out.

 

out of gas by dramamine_addict 7-16-02
.........................	....................	last panel, you better think of something. man, fuck you narrator and fuck this three panel bullshit!

 

college life by dramamine_addict 7-16-02
a weekend at the university you're drunk again, aren't you? nah, brah! i just like sleeping in the trash can. it's good for my back.	that is the most pathetic cover story i have ever heard! seriously, have you been drinking? alright, fine! yes, i had a few drinks MOTHER!!! what's it to ya?	*sigh* how many drinks did you have? judging by the fact that my ass feels like i just participated in a thirty guy gangbang, i would say about...fifty jack and cokes.

 

jesus was a hermaphrodite by dramamine_addict 7-16-02
a question of philosophy and morality hey jesus? i kinda got a question for ya. sure dan, what is it?	if you, like, kissed a guy on the lips once when you were drunk would it make you gay? hmmm...i..guess..not.....	ok. now replace the word once with repeatedly, the word drunk with sober, and the phrase "kissed a guy on the lips" with "licked a guys ass." are you gay then? why are you asking me this?

 

i get dumb, sometimes by dramamine_addict 7-16-02
based on a true conversation so yeah, after the date we went back to her place for coffee. did you have coffee or "coffee?" wooooo!!!	uh...coffee, i guess. we just watched tv and i left her place after conan. did you two watch tv or "watch" tv? wooooo!!!	uh, i didn't even get that last one. that or "that?" wooooo!!!

 

jingle, jingle, jingle by dramamine_addict 7-16-02
ho ho ho ho hooOOOOLY SHIT!!! YOUR HEAD...IT'S FUCKING HUGE!!!!! i know...it is my secret shame.	secret? bah! no one can keep a secret that big. har har, santa. enough chit-chat. here's my angle. unless you want me to throw a huge tantrum and make you look bad, you'll get me that new porsche i asked for for christmas.	hmmm......how about a 97' dodge neon? don't fuck with me, kris! i can cry on demand.

 

and i need to go to bed now by dramamine_addict 7-17-02
alright, sir, i'm placing you under arrest. but officer, what exactly is it that i have done? i think you're arresting me just because i'm a bear. isn't that right, you racist?	yes, well, that and the 17 pounds of cocaine i found on your person! oh...right.......	however, some of us policemen so have a "sweettooth" for a certain type of "sugar" that will make things like this go away. (hint, hint) ah. oops! i seem to have dropped a ziploc bag filled with this seeminlgy innocuous powdery substance. would you mind picking it up for me, officer?

 

shot down by dramamine_addict 7-17-02
pssst! hey...hey...hey, you! ...................	psst! hey, seriously, look over here! pssst!! ..................	psst! hey...hey, girl! psst...hey, c'mon! please? for the last fucking time, no i will not go out with you!!!

 

meetings with remarkable men by dramamine_addict 7-17-02
holy shit, i can't believe it! my favorite robot actor of all time, bs2000, is standing right in front of me! i can't believe i'm finally meeting you sir. pleased to meet you as well, mr. mu-tron	wow...so what was it like working with c3po in your last movie? c3po...the man is a genius. he's done so much for the robot acting community that i couldn't help but be in awe of his pure skill and dedication to the craft.	uh-huh...hey, can i lick your teeth? one step closer and you'll find out why they call me "ol' lasereyes!"

 

bjork by dramamine_addict 7-17-02
any minute now....................	yep...any minute now and i'll be hearing from her....................	uh, george, something tells me that that bjork girl isn't going to call you. no way, narrator! she was totally impressed how i killed all 20 of her bodyguards, stapled a piece of paper with my number on it to one of their ripped off heads , and threw it at her. yep, any minute

 

indie-rock is dumb by dramamine_addict 7-17-02
another music discussion and another thing about *insert buzz band* is that they were so much better when they were underground and...blah, blah blah blah blah..................... yeah, that's it...keep on talking....just keep talking your elitist bullshit......	....blah blah blah, thom yorke's dick...uh, what are you doing? oh...well, i was going to stab you because you wouldn't shutup about your indie elitist bullshit. i feel kinda bad now, though. i hope you accept my sincerest of apologies.	yeah, that really would have hurt my feelings. i would have been forced to write a song about that and write some poetry about it in my online diary. fuck it! you die now!!!!!

 

heartbreaker by dramamine_addict 7-18-02
well hey there, beautiful. my name is george. i was wondering if you weren't busy maybe you'd like to go out this friday? uhhh...i'm actually kinda busy this friday with doing nothing. i'm going to stand over here now.	don't worry, george. you can always do what you normally do when you're feeling lonely! *sigh*	male escort services...gotta love em! oh yeah, baby! take it off...slower! ooh! whatever you say! by the way, i'm going to have to charge you an extra hundred bucks for the whole "making me want to vomit during sex" thing.

 

let's do the time warp again! by dramamine_addict 7-19-02
a goof-up in the time continuum results in this scenario. i claim this land in the name of the confederate states of america, y'all! dude, the war's over. it's been over for over a hundred years now. just shutup!	shit, you're kidding me right? nope...blacks and whites now live in harmony, along with asians, hispanics, and many other peoples of color.	interesting...well, i'm off to kill myself now! yeah, you might want to do that. bye!

 

i'm going back to college by dramamine_addict 8-21-02
wooo! fucking college. hell yeah, i am in college. i'm smart, i'm cool, and i'm sexy because i am NOW IN COLLEGE!!!!! yeah, buddy. hot damn, alien bob! i am so happy fer ya. what college are you going to?	devry university. i saw an add for it on the tv and they just JUMPED to have me enrolled. uh, no offense alien bob but i could have gotten into devry.	yeah....you have no ruined this moment for me. you're the worst ever, cornelius! aw, cheer up alien bob. i hear those devry kids are throw fucking crazy-ass parties.,

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