All comics by ewan

 

Rulsey in Apocolypse by ewan 12-19-01
After WW3 Rulsey is one of the few survivors. At times like these, you need to remember the good things in life. What do u mean?	His mission...to spread the gospel of truth. Just remember life's made of one to ones. ?	He walks into the distance knowing his work is done...TRUE...... Friendchips What a spastic.

 

Rulsey in space by ewan 12-19-01
Afer a rigirous selection process, Rulsey has been chosen to make First Contact This is a great moment in our two species history. Cool...Clean...Crisp	The Creature attempts to communicate. We have much to learn from each other. Cool...Clean...Crisp	And so Rulsey returns to earth, knowing he has done mankind a great deed...TRUE... Fuck-Sake ! Friendchips...TRUE...

 

Rulsey Meets Dreamgirl by ewan 12-19-01
2.30pm A Busy Day In Town..... Hi.....Listen i'm so sorry to bother you but i'm in a rush and was wondering if you could give me directions I wouldn't say NO to a cool....clean...crisp one	The chatup line.............. No..honestly i'm in a rush could you just tell where Hope Street is? Shhh.............Can your hear that music in the background...Just listen to the baseline...Genuise....	He Scores !!!! Aww For Fucks Sake!! Friendchips...TRUE

 

Rulsey In Jail by ewan 12-20-01
Year 1 Well I went flying down the right wing.........rucked it....took the guy down..... Really	10 years later ...got the ball rucked it....scored a try....rucked the winger...You know ? the "Cheeky Wee Center Ruck...Canvis Lang ? ------BrainDead------	20 years.... Yep.....theres nothin I like better than a good solid game of rugby.....Frienchips....TRUE .........Fuck!

 

Rulsey and Computer by ewan 12-22-01
Rulsey wants to keep up to date with the world and decides to buy a new PC. Hello, my name is Carl, your new personal computer. What are your needs? LOMO!	Is he happy with it??? Sorry but"LOMO" is not compatable with my operating system. Do you want to select a game from my database? There are over 300 bran new games available. !"£@!"*% ONLY LOMO!!! RUCK , RUCK, RUCK	Well...there was no Lomo...TRUE... BZZZzzzzz.... Friendchips...TRUE...

 

Rulsey Supports The Rugby Boys by ewan 12-22-01
At HUGHINGDON RUGBY CLUB.......... COME ON BOYS RUCK IT .... RUCK IT !!!!! Rulsey shut the fuck up there's three hours to go until the game starts now piss off !	15 minutes BEFORE the game....... COME ON BOYS RUCK IT .... RUCK IT !!!!! Rulsey shut up its only the warm up !	Half time...... WHO THE FUCK PUT BEER IN OUR WATER BOTTLES WERE GONNA FUCKING LOOSE NOW !!! DRINK UP LADS..hehe Frienchips..True

 

Rulsey goes shopping by ewan 1-09-02
In B&Q Superstore . . . Look MR....It's simple...I ordered FRIENDCHIPS last week and I DEMAND to speak to the manager!! Ahhh , Mr Rulsey well i'm afraid we don't sell "Crisps" we are a DIY store if you hadn't noticed.	Surely He MUST Be Joking . . . Look mate .... If I don't see FRIENDCHIPS in front of my face in TWO MINUTES ! then there is going to be SERIOUS TROUBLE But where THE FUCK am I going to get Friendchips in the middle of an industrial estate , hundreds of miles from civilisation?	3 days later . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Sometimes people take things TOO serious Package for Rulsey ? AS I SAID EARLIER . . . If you wan't this business to do well . . You need to stock The Basics . . . .Frienchips...True

 

Maggis The Unposh by ewan 1-27-02
Somewhere In The Rough Streets Of The Govan Ghetto . . Man , that BUCKFAST has really gone to my head . . I'm starting to feel kinda weird !	2 Mins Later And The Transformation Into The REAL MAGGIS Has Taken Place . . . Posh Bastards ! ! !	Maggis Lays Down The Facts And PBD's The Policeman ! ! ! So you want Gazelle , Clicky , Thow , Davy And Feg All Thrown In Jail . . . Whats The Charge ? Just For Being Posh Officer . . . . Just for Being Posh . . . BASTARDS THE LOT OF YE'S ! !

 

Thow PBD's by ewan 1-28-02
Thow and Johnston meet up after a hard day playing Lomo. Alrite Thow, up for a bucke-thon at mine tonight. Just got another Kilo sent up from Jamaica. All the lads are coming too. You know Johnston...I think this might be the best day of my life.	By coincedence, Colsey walks by. To PBD or not to PBD? Thow u wank, fuck off i hate u , wheres usher? Life sux.	...PBD Did u know that the internal combustion engine was released four years before the can opener? FOUR YEARS!!! Fancy a shag?

 

Traditional Mcg by ewan 1-30-02
Gazzelle and Mcg meet up just before hedding off to curlers. Rite Mcg, what u been up to recently? You know , the usual...torring em, porring em.	Conversation continues............. Uh ooooh...I smell puma. Here mate, you'll never guessed what happened to me last night....	Oh no, not again....... WHAT THE FUCK? Wheres everything gone. Don't worry, its just the preparatory bleaching, for my VERY white story.

 

Rulsey Seeks Advice by ewan 2-05-02
Rulsey seeks a bit of advice from his shop co-worker. I just don't understand why the girls dont like me? I've got a wee cheeky smile... You're fat...	Does anyone know this guy? I can make 'em laugh... You stink...	Beacause he needs help... And have u ever seen the "Rulsey Ruck", hehehehe, Friendchips...TRUE... Your OBSESSED!!!

 

Ladies please by ewan 5-20-02
Ladies!...Ladies! Let me introduce you all to my poofy friend Graham. I know ladies...i know, he is a little on the ugly side but i wont hold it against him, im a good scottish laddy. Um...cheers, that was a bit shady.	Now ladies, personality is what counts, isnt that rite Graham? haha. Ladies I understand we arent all as good looking as me but i cant help it, I was born this way, haha, isn't that right ladies. I'm gonna leave now. My night is ruined.	Now Grahams pissed off ladies, and im sure he had a brilliant night...isnt that right ladies, we can get down to business. Now hands off ladies, ill be here all night...anyone for a McChicken Wrap???

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