"Dear Joe, your father die in cage. Eviscerated through eye socket with spoon. Very painful. So sad. Did not die for 72 hours. He True Warrior for Great Justice!!!! Enhance your pain!!!! Love Mum.
Joe feel sad...
He True Warrior! I just Weak Man. Must honor family!
Wise man, he say "pain without suffering is like ocean without water"
Joe feel happy!!!!!
I LAUGH AT MY PAIN!!!!!!!! AHHHH AHHHH AHHHH AHHHH
Hey joe-san, welcome to Pain Club! Remember - Pain Club only exist in mind, ok Joe?
I am greatly honoured!! I wish to enhance my pain!!
Ohhh Joe then you come to right place!!! There are many ways for man to enhance his pain - so many ways!!! And they all hurt!!! But NEVER be like the Weak Man, Joe, for that bring dishonour to family!
AAAAAAHHHHHHH I MUST TRY THEM ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Joe feel happy!!!!!
Hey slow down Joe-san! You must learn to savour your pain! So we start off gently with Pain No.1 - 'Pain by Heat'
I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You know, working from home is not as easy as you might think
It's actually quite hard work. Well, pretty hard...well, fairly...umm it can take a lot of discipline...like today I'll spend 8 hours in front of the screen.
Ten minutes later...
Thank fuck there's an 8 hour "Quincy" special on, I thought I'd have to do some work today. Woohoo!
Since our last announcement the incidence of "nail hammered into head" injuries has risen by 5000%. Do not, repeat DO NOT hammer nails into your head. Thank you.
Happy ending!
I LAUGH AT MY PAIN!!!!!!!! AHHHH AHHHH AHHHH AHHHH
Oh and don't attempt to eviscerate yourself with a rusty spoon either.
Emergency announcement - due to a manufacturing defect a batch of nails containing 50% napalm have been sold to the public. DO NOT hammer these into your head as they may ignite...
Happy ending!
I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
In other news, scientists have discovered that (pain + agony) * suffering = life...