All comics by kagechaotic

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by kagechaotic
3-25-09
Oh Jon. Could you come in here for a moment, please?
Is this about the raise I asked for?
Not exctly, Jon. You're fired.
But the economy sir! where can I possibly find another job now!?!?!
I fucking had to ask.
Thank you!

 

by kagechaotic
3-25-09
So dad, why did you get that guy Jon fired from his job?
I bet it's because you are trying to teach him a lesson. No...it's because you're testing his faith in You.
Honestly? I just like fucking with people.
Dad, you're one sick fuck. Seriously.
You're adopted.

 

by kagechaotic
3-25-09
Meanwhile...on Earth (in Ohio).
I really can't take much more of this bullshit dead end fast food job. I'm just gonna fucking end it now.
Jesus! Did you come to talk me out of killing myself?
Well no. I was just going to ask if I could use your bathroom.
Oh. well. This is sufficiently awkward.

 

by kagechaotic
3-25-09
So you were going to kill yourself and suddenly Jesus appears and doesn't want to talk you out of it at all? Somehow, I think you're full of shit, Jon.
But, Kyle, you're my rommate.
You haven't paid rent in months. You don't even have a job.
I still think you're an idiot.
You're a fucking CHICKEN, Kyle.
...and I'm your rommate. My point is proven.

 

by kagechaotic
3-25-09
Jesus? Jesus H. Christ, what did you want earlier?
I called to ask you for some cash, Dad.
Well, how much do you need?
Oh, about this much.
Bad joke award.
Damn.

 

by kagechaotic
3-25-09
Meanwhile, back in Ohio.
Welcome aboard, Jon. I know you'll do just fine at Phuck Inc.
Thanks Mr. Coxnif.
Now, is there anything I can do for you before I leave you, Jon?
Um. Can you say the name of our company again? I'm so excited to work here, I can't hear it enough.
Phuck Inc.
Excellent.

 

by kagechaotic
3-25-09
Jon meets some of his new co-workers.
Yeah. I'm Melvin. I'm the VD of Advertising. This is your new cubicle.
*snort*Did you just say *snort* VD?
Yes. Why? Is being the Video Director of Advertising funny to you, jerk?
No...not at all.
*giggle*
Just can't leave him alone, can you, Dad?!

 

by kagechaotic
3-26-09
So this new place isn't so bad.
Are you kidding!? Everyone who works here is a fucking psycho. Or a kiss ass. Or a slut.
Say that last thing again...
what, "or a slut"?
Now how is that bad?
I never said that part was bad.

 

by kagechaotic
3-26-09
Jon Don: The worst sweet-talker in the history of the world.
Jon, thanks for asking me out.
Oh, you're welcome Lisa. I don't date much anymore.
Oh me either! So you work in accounting?
Yes. And you work in breasts?
I said breasts, didn't I?

 

by kagechaotic
3-26-09
Later...
Sorry I didn't talk much at dinner.
It's fine, Jon. It's actually probably best you didn't.
Um. So, do you think we can go out again sometime?
Only if I can come out naked.
........
It was a JOKE, Jon! Damn it.

 

by kagechaotic
3-27-09
So how'd the date go, Romeo?
Oh, I'm destined to be sexually frustrated for a loooong time.
That bad, huh?
*sigh* I think I'm too sexually awkward for a girl like Lisa, Kyle.
You said breasts, didn't you?
Second thing out of my mouth.

 

by kagechaotic
3-27-09
A few minutes later.
Let Uncle Kyle teach you something about women, Jon.
I don't really think that's a good idea, Kyle.
Are you getting into her pants doing things your way?
well...i....
I am eager to study at your feet, sensei.

 

by kagechaotic
3-27-09
Meanwhile, across town.
But he was so precious, Bruce.
Well, then why didn't you fuck him?
I think YOU'RE precious, Bruce.
Well, then why don't you fuck me.
Point proven.
This isn't over, wench.

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