kaufman  
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Dance for me, little monkey; pun for me, my precious.

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by kaufman
12-15-17
So 1944 was the only year Santa didn't bring you presents?
Well, there was also 1949, when he paid my parents and those of all the other children, and brought us to the North Pole instead.
Wow! You got to go to Santa's place? How lucky!
It wasn't luck. He had switched his gift list with his shopping list and bought all the kids.
So what happened to all the presents? Where did they go?
Oh, you know. Cereal boxes, Cracker Jacks. There's a reason the guy's so chubby.
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