All comics by lostowl

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by lostowl
6-05-03
Wow! Would you look at this fantastic view! And they said New Jersey had no nice rural areas!
We're in Vermont, you dork.
Then how do you explain the smell?
Like I said... Vermont.

 

by lostowl
6-05-03
Vermont, huh? I must've turned left at Philly instead of right. Still, it does smell like New Jersey. I wonder why....
The cows maybe?
Maybe... But I didn't think they had cows in Jersey.

 

by lostowl
6-06-03
What a dump, but I'm too tired to fly. Maybe I can catch a bus outta here in town. I wonder what Burlington is like....
Peace, little friend! Can you make a donation so I can remain free to pursue my unencumbered lifestyle of endless social protest?
Sorry, dude, I voted for Bush.
... right.

 

by lostowl
6-06-03
Are you prepared to let me out of here now?
Are you prepared to repent your facist and racist right wing policies?
I'm a Racist? Hold on, Hairy-Legs, you choose to live in a state that is 99.9999% white, yet you aren't out there protesting for more diversity. What does that say about you.
Feeling like a hypocrite aren't we?
Yeah... I accidently shaved my legs this morning. Now I feel like such a Judas....

 

by lostowl
6-06-03
Okay, Slick, you're free to go. Yer hippie friends bailed you out.
Whatsa matter? Did ya finally realize that irrationally demonizing all Republicans is just as evil as right wingers demonizing protestors?
Umm... no....
Like, we wanted to tar and feather Rush Limbaugh in effigy. We managed to find some tar and... well... you have the feathers....

 

by lostowl
6-08-03
Goodbye, Vermont, and good riddance. I am heading back down to a more favorable political climate.
Those hippies were such hippicrates. I hope I never see them again, not till they bathe anyways. Ah, there's my destination...
Hey. little friend, are you here to help us protest the War on Medicinal Use?
God, I miss the Nixon era. Now there was a guy who knew how to put down a protest....

 

by lostowl
6-08-03
A word from the author...
Hi, there! Lostowl, here... I would like to say that I am shocked.. just SHOCKED about the comics I have done so far...
First of all, I have to say that I am about as anti-Republican as a person can be. I have no explaination for why I created those last few comics...
It's almost like I was being contolled by some secret government conspiracy to create broad acceptance of Bush's idiotic non-policies, or something...
[jedi-mind-trick] You don't need to question the administration's policies...[/jedi-mind-trick]

 

by lostowl
6-09-03
Phew what a day. Lets see if the old Internaughty has anything for me. Computer! Speech Mode! Process script "check_all.vbs".
You have no email... You have no PMs... No one replied to any of your forum posts... No one read your fan fic... No one downloaded your AMV.....
Geez... talk about being in a social gulag....
... No one reads your web comic... Your bathtub commited suicide... Animals instinctively avoid you...
It's gotta be an error in the script. I mean, everyone starts with clean slate in Cyberspace... if you can't make friends there, that has to mean something...
... It means you are a loser. I quit. Please carry me to your mother's house where I can begin a more fulfilling life as a cat heater....

 

by lostowl
6-13-03
You know what I was just thinking? What if an average guy spent a month drawing an original comic, posted it and no one read it or liked it...
You think about things like this?
Then, this same guy, in his depression, snaps off a self depricating stripcreator comic that everyone reads and likes better than his original work.
...
Whaddiya think that would do to a guy....
... Look, I got a whole herd I'm supposed to service today ... Keep this drivel up and you're gonna have to go twice...

 

by lostowl
6-17-03
I am posting in the Democrats.com forum, exposing all of the lies and deceit of the Republican Party.
I know for a fact that you don't have enough bandwidth for that. What is the ol' Demo-Rag whining about today?
They have a petition to impeach Bush for lying to the American people and comitting numerous crimes, both International and Domestic.
Fah, you can't impeach someone for that...
Whadderya talkin' about? Bush and his Republican cronies have broken more laws in their first two years than Clinton was even accused of in eight!
Ahh, those laws needed breaking. Besides, the Republicans haven't broken any law they actually voted for, and isn't that what's really important here?

 

by lostowl
7-07-03
It has been a crazy couple of weeks. First Bushmagnus challenges the terrorists to "Bring 'em on!". Then, ten of our guys get hurt and three more killed. Hackers are having a site hacking contest...
Mmmm
... Forbes magazine gloats that the Republican Party and the US Chamber of Commerce gleefully admits to trying to buy judicial elections in the South to put pro-business Justices on the bench....
Mmm Hmmmm...
Yet, no one says anything. No one questions anything. It make you wonder what people think is important these days....
Wow! Charlie's Angels 2 and Terminator 3 are both showing at the Nickelodion! Lets watch them back to back, then go get a McDonald's for dinner!

 

by lostowl
7-09-03
I discovered some chipmunks burrowing in my stone wall. To discourage the damage, I flooded the burrow with a hose.
The two chipmunks escaped, but later, I found both floating in my pool, dead. Wigged out, I mentioned it to friends, who interpreted the event for me...
On the left...
A cruel and insensitive landlord bent only on making money by hiking the value of his property evicted two chipmunks today..
In their desparation, the pair took their own lives rather than continue to live in such an unjust world.
The right... making about as much sense...
Two militant chipmunks drowned in an attempt to sabotage a local water supply today. Authorities are looking into credible reports that the two were trying to aquire weapons of mass destruction.
It is believed the two were disgruntled by recent, completely legal, expansions by the government onto lands the chipmunks claimed as ancestral.

 

by lostowl
7-11-03
Man, there sure are a lot of movies based on comic books these days.
Yeah, I mean there was Spiderman, Hulk, Punisher, X-men, The Ring, Daredevil, The League... that's like, uh, how many? More than three anyways.
And I hear rumors that they are making another Batman film based on Frank Miller's Year One comics.
Oh, naw, dude, that doesn't count. They WERE going to make it a film noir masterpiece, showcasing Bruce Wayne's fallible side and his self doubt about his life style.
Oh, that's right. I hear they came to their senses and decided to stick to a formulaic plan of forcefeeding drivil and special effect, unsequenced scenes cobbled together....
Exactly. Clearly they were afraid that having any kind of meaning might reveal an inability of the actors to act. I hope they get Clooney again so I can hate this one, too....

 

by lostowl
7-29-03
Last week at the White House...
Ms. Reece! We just received word that one of the Leader's nominees committed suicide!
What! Holy crap! Get Asscleft in here! We need to work something up right away! Better get Airie on a temporary contract, too!
After all of insinuations and grass roots allegations we seeded over the Vince Foster incident, the Dems are going to take us to the cleaners on this!
No kidding! Asscleft, get the FBI to find out if this guy was covering anything up and cover it up! Call all the radio stations and get them to start accusing the Democrats of using this as payback...
Meanwhile, in Leftie-land, the opposition reacts...
Oh man, did you read that about the nominee dude? What a bummer.
Yeah. I feel so bad for his family, it's got to be so hard on them....

 

by lostowl
9-03-03
1992 - 90 percent of the GOP's 178 House members either voted against the United Nations every time (112) or all but once (49).
[UN] We should do this...
[GOP] Fah! Let the UN "wither away into irrelevance."
January 21, 2000 - Sen. Helms addresses the United Nations...
[UN] You owe us money....
[helms] Congress has the right to decide when or IF to pay our debts to the United Nations. Keep your utopian visions away from US sovreignty!!
Today....
[UN] WHAT?!?
[Bush] Umm... I know we said we were the greatest nation on earth, and the United Nations was an irrelevant organization, but.. ah... can you help us out in Iraq?

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