I SHALL DEFEAT YOU, EVIL COOK! YOU HAVE FRIED MANY OF MY BACON BRETHREN TO A CRISP AND I WILL AVENGE THEIR DEATHS!
You know, maybe I shouldn't cook bacon anymore.
YOU--what?
I just won't buy it ever again, leaving a extra package on the shelf at the store every week to go bad and be thrown out, where it spends its last days rotting away in a trashcan.
CURSES! YOU ARE MORE EVIL THAN I COULD'VE EVER IMAGINED!
