All comics by skagg

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by skagg
5-14-01
ooh! pay per view!
and now, final destination
o dear go nooooo
i saw it coming!
dear Mr director, i feel puke
i need these viewers like a fucking nail in the head

 

by skagg
5-14-01
Think happy thoughts, Think happy thoughts, THINK HAPPY THOUGHTS
Oh shit!
Hehe, stupid bunny

 

by skagg
5-16-01
hmmm...
hmmm...
yeah!

 

by skagg
5-18-01
*bbbrrrrrrrrrrrrr*
what the fuck?
motorbike
does not compute
what, you don't think its good??
yeah, my ass

 

by skagg
5-18-01
welcome students to the course which i hope, considering you chose it, you will enjoy
todays first discussion, "monkeys and typewriter - the paper they need"
*ugh*
butt-rape

 

by skagg
5-18-01
rhett, you stinky bastard, keep it in you own box!
*pfft*
can you blame me when i get THAT reaction?!

 

by skagg
5-19-01
In the offices of low pass users across the world...
All your base are belong to us, hahaha
All your base are belong to us, hahaha
All your base are belong to us, hahaha
All your base are belong to us, hahaha
Meanwhile, back home...
All your base are belong to us, hahaha
Did I miss something?!

 

by skagg
5-23-01
Pull my finger
No
*pfft*
Ahh fuck it!

 

by skagg
5-23-01
The first rule of might club is you do not talk about might club.
Ihadn't really had time to think of any more

 

by skagg
5-23-01
*pfft*
If I squeeze my butt cheeks I fart!

 

by skagg
5-23-01
Oh my god it burns!!
*pfft*
I can fart acids!

 

by skagg
5-23-01
Bastard! You burned my beard off!
*pfft*
We just found out you can light farts!

 

by skagg
5-23-01
Aint nobody goin in there no more!
*pfft*
*pfft*
Teamwork! YAY!

 

by skagg
5-23-01
TV sucks
Damn wastes of space getting paid to piss me off
OOOOOOOOOH YES!!
Ooh the churchill dog!

 

by skagg
5-23-01
hehe
*pfft*
hehe
*pfft* *pfft*
BASTARDS!!

 

by skagg
5-26-01
I hate those annoying, hard-to-reach itches!

 

by skagg
5-26-01
Aww shit! I left the bathroom light on!

 

by skagg
5-26-01
The worst bit is i can't escape the smell!
*pfft*
Ooh, eggy!

 

by skagg
5-26-01
One for me...
...and one for you...
And so on...
...and one for me...

 

by skagg
5-26-01
...and one for you...
...and one for me...
Dad, just make him shut up!!
...and one for you...

 

by skagg
5-27-01
I know a song that'll get on yer nerves, get on yer nerves, get on yer nerves...
...I know a song that'll get on yer nerves, get-get-get on yer nerves...
If only I could reach my ears with my fingers!
...I know a song that'll get on yer nerves...

 

by skagg
6-02-01
I really need to think of some better jokes after the feeble efforts i made in CC32
Damn right there!
Hmmm, I'm at a loss!
You could always try donkey rape!
You could've at least used the jelly!!
I think it works best without that

 

by skagg
6-02-01
...and now hes stuck with how to finish it off!
Hmmm
Donkey rape kills everything doesn't it!
I think were better off without it

 

by skagg
6-02-01
I really need to think of some better jokes after the feeble efforts I made in CC32
Damn right there!
Hmmm, I'm at a loss!
You could always try donkey rape
You could've at least used the jelly!!
I think were better off without it

 

by skagg
6-05-01
Hey Kev, why the spread legged odd walk today?
Well I went on the lash last nite with the lads and we had a curry, now I've got a burning ring of fire
Hmmm, there only one cure i know
Yeah? Whats that?
butt rape!
ugh! that worked just fine thanks

 

by skagg
6-05-01
Hey Kev, whats up? Your legs are spread further than your manboobs today!
Well I went on the lash last nite with the lads and we had a curry or seven and now I've got a burning ring of fire!
Hmmm theres only one cure I know...
Yeah? Whats that?
butt rape
ugh! this will do just fine thankyou

 

by skagg
6-07-01
Damn nigger! I, the 13th duke of Wimbledon, should jump down there and cuts his gonads off! But alas, I haven't the time, as I am late for the theatre! Oh well, just one can't hurt can it?
Gee, I hope nobody notices the way I'm dressed. Damn nigger's blood stains, thats gonna cost me to get it cleaned! This Magnum of Champagne might help soothe the pain though. And this disguise beard?!
The leading player is so very bourgois whereas Charles is portrayed in such a post-modern manner that its all very laughable. Maybe if they were sent to military school like me they wouldn't be such a
Hey, isn't that the 13th duke of Wimbledon?!
Hey..*hic*..whatcha lookin at?! i used to be youngnh liek you *hic* ill fuck you pie tastin ass like that jesus guuuuy back there...im hoome now. Im saailing...i am saaailing.that last champers w-zzzz

 

by skagg
6-07-01
Yeah down with the white man, I burn you all!!! BWAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!
Damn nigger! I, the 13th duke of Wimbledon, should jump down there and cut his gonads off!! But alas, I haven't the time as I am late for the theatre!! Oh well, just one can't hurt can it?
Gee, I hope nobody notices the way I'm dressed. Damn nigger's blood stains, thats gonna cost me to get it cleaned! This magnum of Champagne might help soothe the pain though. And this disguise beard?!
The leading player is so very bourgois whereas Charles is portrayed in such a post-modern manner that its all very laughable. Maybe if they were sent to military school like me they wouldn't be so bad
Hey, isn't that the 13th duke of Wimbledon?!
Hey *hic* ehatcha lookin at?! i used to be youngnh liek you *hic* ill fuk you pie tastion ass like that jesus guuuy back there...im hooome now-im saaailing, i am saaailing.that last bottl-zzzzzzzzzz

 

by skagg
6-07-01
In the office of Skagg Industries
ARAHAAGR OGARGGRH
AAROGAHORRR OGHOAAAG
AAARRGGROHA AAAGROHGO
AAGRAOHROGAHGOOAO ROAGGGHR
Yeah! That'll teach you to chuck a brick at good ol' cow-fucking Ronald, BURN!!!!!! BWWWAAAAHHAHAAOH AAOHAAHAO AHOAHAAAA AAAAAAAAA AHAHAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAA - What? Oh yeah, drop it and fuck off!
Heres the money you made from selling cigarettes to pre-teen orphans sir

 

by skagg
6-07-01
1975
raaar! tobor will cornhole you!
go away piss bitch, we don't wanna be you friends
*tobor's gaaay*
*tobor's gaaay*
2001
RAAAR! TOBOR *WILL* CORNHOLE YOU!! I'M THE FUCKING DADDY NOW! WHOS THE PISS BITCH EH?! RAAAR!!!
agh unf gfn gru arg ing ouch!

 

by skagg
6-13-01
In the Marquis de Sade's new york apartment
Guys can you unplug me from the socket now?
...in other news today, blue stick men make great international adaptors for any application
You know he has been standing there for seven hours straight, maybe we should let him go
Not yet, the ricky lake marathon is about to begin

 

by skagg
6-13-01
In the Marquis de Sade's new york apartment
Guys can you unplug me from the socket now?
...in other news today, blue stick men make great international adaptors for any application
You know he has been standing there for seven hours straight, maybe we should let him go
Not yet, the ricky lake marathon is about to begin

 

by skagg
6-14-01
did you know this ball is 100%rubber?
eeeeyyyy im the fonze
like f**k you are
you know what id pay you $100 to go down on me
me too

 

by skagg
6-16-01
Tying people naked to a street lamp with a blow-up sheep on their cock is one thing, but don't you think this is goin too far
Nah, did you see him? That wass fucking hilarious! I can't wait to see him at the wedding tomorrow

 

by skagg
7-28-01
So, satan buddy, im gonna need a little help with my deathmatch, you think you can help?
well skagg, i can do pretty much anything if the price is right
will this be enough?
WILL IT EVER!!! ahem, i mean, yes, ill see what i can do
o/' and iiiiiiiiiii, will alwaays love yooooouuuuuoooooohhhhh o/'
okay okay okay, stoppit, i give, ill call my troops back

 

by skagg
7-29-01
This is Big Brother would little welsh annoying robot please come to the diary room...
Oooh Big brother, you've got such lovely frapes in here, aren't they lovely! Anyway Big Brothe, I was just bored and was wondering who you really were and what you look like
OOH YOU'LL FIND OUT SOONER OR LATER!!! RIGHT AFTER BIG BROTHER CORNHOLES YOU SWEET ROBOT ASS!!!

 

by skagg
8-09-01
doctor, im getting worried about my bunnywumpkins skagg. is he gonna be ok?
i wouldnt worry about him, hes just going trough a tough time. all those who enter the cup and get shut out in the first round experience this
jeez, hes really "preparing" himself in there isnt he? hes been emptying his balls for seven hours straight
yeah, but maybe he should turn his mind to the cup and not satisfying his woman for the first time
i can hear you guys in there! dont think i cant hear you!

 

by skagg
8-17-01
WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU??
I am your birthday mole NOT A BUG THINGY and im here to give you your mole-o-gram. o/'HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOOOO YOUOUOUUUU, YOU DO NOT SUCK DIIICKo/'
THIS PLACE HAS GONE DOWNHILL SINCE THE WAR HASN'T IT?
Well you couldnt honestly expect the place to be run well after the Germans won could you?
WHY OH WHY? WHY DID THIS HAPPEN? WHY MUST I SUCK DICK?
Hey when some guy offers you $602000000000000000000000 to see his plan through what are you gonna do? Jeez, damn rightous humans! I hate this place!

 

by skagg
9-10-01
And now follows a polite announcement...
...in order to keep the newbie fun to a maximum...
...just avoid this guy!
RAAAR!!! TOBOR IS SORRY!!! CRABBY DOES NOT SUCK DICK!!! HOWEVER HE DOES HAVE GOOD CORNHOLE!!!

 

by skagg
9-15-01
And all the girlies say I'm pretty fly for a white guy

 

by skagg
9-15-01
..........................................................................................................................................................
and im not coming out till that wirthling thing goes away

 

by skagg
9-15-01
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
dammit! i didnt think youd find me here!

 

by skagg
9-15-01
'nuff said!

 

by skagg
9-16-01
You seem down. whats up?
ah my tv's bust, i can't get anything on it
have you tried phoning the repairman?
nah, i cant be arsed
excuse me sir but i couldn't help overhearing your conversation. have u ever considered a change of religion?

 

by skagg
9-17-01
you really mean it? you really think im sexy?
hell yeah! now let me see that sexy little pink hairy- oh my god!! thats hideous
wha? whaaa?? what is it?
hey! guys, come check this out! its freaky man!
hehehe, dude! that just aint right!
what? me touching you there or that thing on pinky's arse?

 

by skagg
9-23-01
we interrupt the i love lucy marathon to bring you important information about what to do in the event of nuclear fallout...
...in the event of nuclear fallout nowhere will be entirely safe, not even wisconsin, so prepare yourselves a shelter...
...and when the all clear has been given remember to kick Captain Toe-Puss' ass for being too interested in that donkey to save us

 

by skagg
10-02-01
mass at the church of skagg
...and brother Jay and Bob, the apostle that speaketh not much, were given 3 pink donkeys...
...and with these donkeys they did passeth the timeth cornholingeth and slayingeth, you know, the kind of stuff that seems funny when youre mashed...
...and those donkeys died for their sins and a steady supply of bud! Now if you turn to your hymn books as we sing "all hash pipes great and small"
bugger, ive been sat up here for all these years when i could have got a bunch of bloody donkeys to do it for me! ahh pigfuck!

 

by skagg
10-06-01
god im bored

 

by skagg
11-02-01
one
band
only
dave, go down the shops and get me some milk
i can't ma, they're closed

 

by skagg
11-05-01
yes this was an excuse to hit fifty!
now go celebrate or something!

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