All comics by starsammy

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by starsammy
9-18-02
I'm bored.
Why?
Can't tell you.
Why, because I'm a squirrel?
No, because I might stop being bored.
Hmm, tough case.

 

by starsammy
9-18-02
Can I borrow your cell phone?
No.
Please pretty please?
No.
You're MEAN!
He always ruins the keys with his tiny claws.

 

by starsammy
9-18-02
At this very moment, people are killing each other around the world...
Yes, that's very sad.
...And I'm sitting on this stupid bench because I failed miserably.
Huh? Failed what? There's nothing you can do about it!
The annual Quake World Tournament. I didn't make it to the Finals.
Oh screw you.

 

by starsammy
9-18-02
Corporate brands suck. They use customers as walking billboards.
Then why do you support them by buying their clothing?
What do you want me to do? Go naked?
You could just buy non-branded stuff
Then I wouldn't look cool.
The dilemma must be killing you.

 

by starsammy
9-18-02
Girls never notice me. I'll never get a date
Hi Sam! You know, I was wondering... Are you going to Prom with anyone?
Right now, I'd go out with any girl. Even ugly ones.
Er, Sam? Hello? Hello?
I'm so desperate I'd probably go out with a guy, should he ask.

 

by starsammy
9-18-02
Hello? Hello?
It's not like I'm repelling, right? I mean, Mom even told me once she's witnessed girls looking at me.
Well, see ya. Call me, ok?
In fact, she probaly made it up.
I'd have NOTICED.

 

by starsammy
9-18-02
Mom told me some girls are attracted to me.
Since there's no way this is true, she was probably talking about herself.
That's the problem with moms. They're all convinced their son is the next Brad Pitt.

 

by starsammy
9-19-02
A girl asked me out yesterday.
Hey that's great! ... You don't look thrilled though.
Oh I am, trust me.
So why the blank look?
My brain fused when she touched my hand.
That would explain the smoke coming out of your ears.

 

by starsammy
9-20-02
Lenny Kravitz is auctioning all the items from his house in New Orleans.
How come? Is he broke or something?
No, he just wants to redecorate.
Oh. I guess he'll give the profits to a charity.
Are you kidding? That's Lenny friggin' Kravitz. He'll probably use the money to buy a 100 carat diamond piercing or something.
Personally I'd buy nuts. You know where you stand with nuts.

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