CC 206: Happy Birthday, Son by Chi_The_Cynic 8-25-03

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SON Now that you're becoming an adult We feel you're old enough to know Putting up with you for the last 18 years was a living hell We hate you.

CC 206: Happy Divorce by Chi_The_Cynic 8-25-03

Heard you were still feeling blue about our divorce Just to let you know that I'm not

Get Well Soon! by choadwarrior 8-25-03

Good luck in the hospital... ...though you aren't exactly ill... If I can't burn off those hemorrhoids... I gladly will.

CC 206: Paging Mr. Checker! by kaufman 8-25-03

Congratulations ... Your head really smells awful, you know. You really ought to take that thing off. So? What difference does it make to you? ... on providing a new twist to an old, Well ... tired joke. Them rotten turbans ain't gonna generate gravitons by themselves. Ha, ha.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Say it with flowers! by ObiJo 8-25-03

To my son on his eighteenth birthday. Get the fuck out.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

... by ObiJo 8-25-03

To my wife on our 20th anniversary. Take your son and GET the fuck out.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

... by ObiJo 8-25-03

My deepest condolences on your loss. I was reading through the obituaries yesterday and I happened to see that you'd lost your wife and son in a car accident. Well, it just so happens...

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

... by ObiJo 8-25-03

Dear Michael Jackson... I'd like to offer you my son. Now while it's true that he's 18, and you prefer your meat cooked a little rarer than that, he is quite diminutive. His vocabulary's also at 4th-grade level, if that helps.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

... by ObiJo 8-25-03

Dear God... They're still fucking here.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

... by ObiJo 8-25-03

Dear Santa... I'd like a burlap sack and a shovel. One more bag of coal and I end you.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

... by ObiJo 8-25-03

Dear Department of Homeland Security... While it pains me to do this, since I love my wife and son so very very much, my patriotism demands I detail to you the threat they pose. They're, um, insecure and stuff.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

... by ObiJo 8-25-03

Dear OJ Simpson... My wife's dating a waiter. You know what you have to do.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

conclusion by ObiJo 8-25-03

But, dad, why do I have to wear this waiter's apron? Just do as I say, boy. I'm gonna go out to a movie. Make sure you and your mother don't leave the house. And would it kill you to neck with her a little?

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Interestingly enough, though I didn't think about it when I was writing it, the answer to that last panel is Yes.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

CC 206: Best wishes on your new PC by lukket 8-26-03

Best wishes with your brand new pc. It's loaded with Office and Windows XP From now on, your sorry ass belongs to me!

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troelsea at gmail dot com

CC 206: Say it with a meat axe by boorite 8-26-03

Will you be my Valentine? Go away! Well, if that's how you're going to be... YOU'VE GOT A DATE WITH THE FREEZER CHEST!

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What others say about boorite!

CC 206: A right jolly old pimp by boorite 8-26-03

Ho, ho, ho! MERRY CHRISTMAS!

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What others say about boorite!

CC206: Thanks Mom and Dad by mmyers 8-26-03

Mom and Dad, Thanks for bringing me up in the kind of household that you did. It gave me the confidence to leave and join a gang. What're you looking at, bitch?

CC206: For the boys serving a nickle in state prison by mmyers 8-26-03

That day I saw you in the showers, I felt my heart begin to fly. And so I brought you flowers, with a tear rested upon my eye. And if you turn against me, I'm going to shiv you, bitch, until you die, die, die. All my love, Raymond.

CC206: Congratulations on your 300th comic by mmyers 8-26-03

Congratulations on making your 300th comic. But please keep in mind... Just because you think of it doesn't neccessarily make it funny. Stop teh suck.

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

... by ObiJo 8-26-03

Happy 5th Birthday, little girl! Me and Tweety Twinkleby have used magic fairy dust to make this the bestest birthday card ever! *tweety tweety* Open up and see! HOLY FUCKIN FUCK FUCK! We've blinked into existence again! GODDAMNIT! That shit eater of a clown must have fucked up his fairy dust concentration again! Shut the hell up and fight you two!!! We're getting decapitated left and right!!! CLOSE THE CARD, BITCH!

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

CC 206: Welcome back, kunter by boorite 8-26-03

Happy triumphant return to StripCreator! Yes! Welcome back! Who the fuck are you, again? Yes! Refresh our memories! Who?

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What others say about boorite!

The Devil is in the Details by kaufman 8-26-03

You may not think spelling class matters ... Sew watt if eye loose teh speling be? But it does! Uh, no, that's not it. You sold me your SOUL.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

... by ObiJo 8-26-03

Who am I? Wherever there is unjustice, I'll be there. Wherever a child cries in the night, I'll be there. I'm the one doing injustices to crying children.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

There's a shitload of unjustice around these parts! So saddle up.

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What others say about boorite!

CC 206 by KajunFirefly 8-26-03

Happy Birthday Son! At least, I'm sure it's today, when did I drop out of grade-school?

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Dad was flammable

Boy, this one should elicit some groans...

CC206: A Little Intentional Misdirection by UnknownEric 8-26-03

So you finally got to third base... Don't worry, Billy, wiffle ball is a hard game! You'll get that run eventually!

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I has a flavor!

This is, like, totally my last one, I promise...

CC206: Fun, Wow! by UnknownEric 8-26-03

On the glorious occasion of your bachelor party, there's a truth you should know before you take that plunge. Love, Joe the Best Man and Fred, his slightly retarded brother. We totally had the bride-to-be in a three-way about six weeks before you met her. That was awesome, man!

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I has a flavor!