Stout! by fuzzyman 5-02-02

Stout! Pilsner! Stout! Ale! Stout! Heroin!

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

MacKajun Meets Father MacOban by fuzzyman 5-02-02

You wanted to see me, Father MacOban? Yes, MacKajun. I fear for your soul. The Lord doesn't like cross-dressers! It's a kilt! It's traditional Scottish attire! You should know that! I understand the kilt, MacKajun. It's those lacy yellow panties that are an abomination! Those aren't lacy and yellow. They're tattered and soiled. I am at once repulsed and fascinated.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

Not Really by fuzzyman 5-02-02

Do you wonder if there's life after death? I'm not worried, Ken. I'll go to Confession before I die and my sins will be forgiven. But, Fuzzyman... you're a Unitarian! KER-TRANS-FORM! Decepti-Catholics! No, no, Roman Catholics.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

hahaha

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wrd.

Another Stripcreator cliche in the making.

First, there was...

Introducing... Drexle! by fuzzyman 8-11-02

It's the final round of the National Pocket Pool Championship! - left - right - left - right - left - right - left - right - left -right - left - right - left - right - left - - left - right - left - right - left - right - left - right - left -right - left - right - left - left - OW! DragonXero fouls! Brad is the new Pocket Pool Champion! All hail Brad! YES! Dang! But wait! What is this? A new challenger has entered the arena! Away with you! I am invincible! Ha! He hasn't seen the size of my cue stick yet!

And then...

Introducing... Wirthling! by fuzzyman 8-12-02

It's the final round of the National Pocket Pool Championship! - left - right - left - right - left - right - left - right - left -right - left - right - left - right - left - - left - right - left - right - left - right - left - right - left -right - left - right - left - left - OW! DragonXero fouls! Brad is the new Pocket Pool Champion! All hail Brad! YES! Dang! But wait! What is this? A new challenger has entered the arena! You can't beat me! You have no testicles! Of course I do! Check it out! They're invisi-ball.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

hahaha

That is fucking magnificent.

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

Fuzz, you are the best here! I've read all of these before (except for the most recent) and they still crack me up!

Here's a little comic I made just for you. Everyone else ignore as it is an in-joke.

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"Eat a fucking cock." - attitudechicka

Oh Sweet Jesus.

I'd forgotten about that.

Thanks for the vote of confidence, though I think Dan, Obi, or Dr K. are more deserving of the description "funniest."

Though my puns are reaching a new Kaufmanesque high... err... low.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

Convergence by fuzzyman 8-13-02

It's the final round of the National Pocket Pool Championship! - left - right - left - right - left - right - left - right - left -right - left - right - left - right - left - - left - right - left - right - left - right - left - right - left -right - left - right - left - left - OW! DragonXero fouls! Brad is the new Pocket Pool Champion! All hail Brad! YES! Dang! But wait! Bob Dylan has entered the arena! But you knew that, didn't you? Needen't Noo?

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

You must get sick of all this praise and admiration, fuzz... but that was hilarious.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

I guess pita was right about that "Needen't Noo?" line. It's got more staying power than I thought.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

I guess I'm in sequel mode. I'm doing sequels to those first two "Now It All Makes Sense" strips...

Now it all makes sense! by fuzzyman 10-18-01

You know, when you used that anti-gravity generator to walk across the water, that was great! Uh... thanks, but... And when you used the portable replicator to produce those loaves and fishes... that was brilliant! Yes, I know, but... Congratulations, Commander Riker! You've restored the timeline! Dammit, Geordi, get me down from here!

Now it all makes sense! Part 2 by fuzzyman 10-24-01

I mean it, Mr. LaForge! Get me down from here! No can do, Commander Riker! Why the hell not? Well, Captain Picard wants to tie up all the loose ends. The plan now is for you to die. Then Dr. Crusher will revive you after three days. This is because I substituted Sleepytime for Earl Grey in the replicator, isn't it? You're a real wit, sir.

And the sequels...

Now it all makes sense! Part 3 by fuzzyman 8-14-02

Counsellor Troi! Please help me! Captain Picard won't let me down from here. I sense that I'm too busy to help you, Commander Riker. What? Deanna? Please... it's me... Will. Your little Number One! I sense that you have difficulty making commitments. What? Oh, okay... I'll marry you, if you insist. *sigh* I sense that you'll be hanging from that cross for a few more days.

Now it all makes sense! Part 4 by fuzzyman 8-14-02

Mr. Worf! Get me down from here! Captain Picard has ordered that you stay nailed to that cross. There is no honor in disobeying him. Honor? To Hell with honor! I'm in excruciating pain! There is no honor in dishonoring one's self in order to gain relief from physical anguish. There is no honor in dishonor? Well... DUH! You Klingons really aren't that bright, are you? Perhaps... but I'm not the one who's nailed to a cross.

Now it all makes sense! Part 5 by fuzzyman 8-14-02

Hello, Commander Riker! Wesley! Maybe you'll let me down from here? I'm sorry, Sir. I can't just yet. *sigh* Captain's orders? No, I'm just enjoying the way your package peeks through the folds in your clothes. Next time they tell me that I need wood for a mission, I'll think it thriugh a bit more carefully.

More to come, I think.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

Riker is looking quite good in this series. I do believe he has lost some weight.

I also sense that my underwear needs replacing after laughing so hard that I... well, nevermind.

BRILLIANT!

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"Eat a fucking cock." - attitudechicka

Ever So Kaufmanesque by fuzzyman 8-30-02

My name is Emery. I'm bored. Nobody ever invites me to go out for dinner. Maybe it's because I'm kind of rough around the edges.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

A Good Thing About Cats by fuzzyman 9-05-02

My cat likes to climb into the shower after I'm finished. Her paws get all wet. On a hot day, she lays on my belly. Her cool, wet paws press against my chest. I call them "the paws that refreshes."

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

Adventures In Alternative Chemistry by fuzzyman 9-26-02

So, I figured out this really great formula for phosphorescent methane! For glow-in-the-dark flatulence? Exactly! You combine methane, butane, and phosphoric acid. Shake vigorously, and you have methyl butyl phosphane! Except that those ingredients will explode the moment they come in contact with each other. Details, details! Now if you were trying for explosive flatulence, you'd be on the right track!

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

I took it as an invitation to write the sequel. Hope you don't mind.

Flatulacity by kaufman 9-26-02

Looks like you found the right formula at last! Almost. But I still need to refuel too often. Speaking of which, have you been feeding your cat chili again? Your shirt is a bit too ... visible.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Not at all. Actually, I did that strip at my wife's request. She wanted to see what you thought of my "chemistry." I was trying to make her laugh by "explaining" how farts could be made to glow in the dark (while dredging up what little I could remember from organic chemistry in college). One of her co-workers pointed out that the combination I picked out of the hat would glow in the dark -- as it exploded.

I have this terrible habit of just making up the most ridiculous shit and seeing if she'll buy it. I have a 99.9% failure rate, but we usually have a good laugh.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

How Sweet It Is... by fuzzyman 10-02-02

I needed the shelter of someone's arms... There you were! I needed someone to understand my ups and downs... There you were! On you're my sweet love mutton... Oh when I touch your love button... I want to stop... and shear you, baby! I just want to stop... and shear you baby! How sweet it is to be loved by ewe!

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

New Rosary by fuzzyman 10-21-02

Hello, class! Thank you coming here today to learn the Pope's New Rosary. I'm eager to learn, Father MacOban. Okay. Repeat after me. "Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. You put your left foot in, you put your left foot out--" Wait a second! Isn't that the Hokey Pokey? That's what it's all about. Oh, in THAT case...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

What's Gabe doing with his hand, anyway?

As Seen On TV by fuzzyman 11-06-02

Whack on! *whack* *whack* Whack off! *whack* *whack* The Whacker! *whack* *whack* *whack* *whack* *whack* *whack* *whack* *whack* *whack* *whack*

When I started this strip, I was using Kajun's character, which is somehow funnier, even if his hand is in the wrong position. Maybe it's the kilt, or that "Whee! I'm whacking off!" expression on his face.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

First Christmas Strip of 2002 by fuzzyman 11-16-02

Hey, man, I-- TERRORIST! What? No, I-- RUN AWAY, EVERYONE! IT'S A TERRORIST! I'm dressed as Joseph for the Christmas pageant!

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

First? No. What about my Wirthling saves christmas series?

Perhaps I should have said, My First Christmas Strip of 2002, which is what I really meant.

Meanwhile...

Here Come The Terrorists by fuzzyman 11-16-02

Hello! You look like a dark and tortured soul! Would you like to join my terrorist network? I am a holy warrior of Al Quesa! Are you a moron? The group is called "Al Queda." Duh! "Al Quesa" means "The Cheese!" But-- Dumbass! Never underestimate the power of cheese!

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

I'm sorry. I'm just saying is all.