Anupan Boonchuen, the director of a dog grooming school, has launched the world’s first Internet radio station for dogs. DogRadioThailand.com features barking DJs playing vocal and instrumental music around the clock. “I’ve noticed that dogs often respond to music,” Boonchuen told the Bangkok Post. “Some wag their tails. Some lift their heads while lying on the floor. At my grooming school we found that when we turned on the music, the dogs’ moods improved. They were more obedient and let us trim their hair [more] easily.” It is reported that 10 students from the dog grooming school have been hired to work as doggy DJs. “One of the main qualifications is that he or she must be good at barking,” said Boonchuen. “Because dogs are our listeners, the DJs may have to make different sounds, such a whining or barking, to match the mood of music they play.” In addition to Thai pop music, Boonchuen plans to expand the station’s programming. “At 9 a.m., we may have a dog greeting show, in which we’ll repeat ‘sawasdee’ [‘hello’] over and over. ... If we say ‘sawasdee’ in some houses, the dog may lift both paws in response. In some houses, the dog may lift only one paw. It depends on how the dog was trained.”

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WASHINGTON - If you think keeping fit is merely mind over matter, Lester Clancy has an invention for you — a cordless jump-rope. That's right, a jump-rope minus the rope. All that's left is two handles, so you jump over the pretend rope. Or if you are truly lazy, you can pretend to jump over the pretend rope.
And for that idea kicking around Clancy's head since 1988, the U.S. Patent Office this month awarded the 52-year-old Mansfield, Ohio, man a patent. Its number: 7037243.
What makes this invention work is the moving weights inside the handles. They simulate the feel of a rope moving, Clancy said. Well, it's only one handle so far because Clancy is waiting for financial backers before building its partner.
But why jump rope without a rope?
It's perfect for the clumsy, Clancy said. "If you are still jumping, you're still using your legs as well as your arms, and getting the cardiovascular workout. You just don't have to worry about tripping on the rope."
It is also good for mental institutions and prisons where rope is a suicide risk, said Clancy, who works as a laundry coordinator in a state prison. And low ceiling fans aren't a hazard any more, he said.
Daniel Wright, who features the cordless jump-rope on his Web site http://www.patentlysilly.com, can barely talk about Clancy's invention without laughing.
"What really grabbed me," Wright said, was the name the item has in its patent, Wright said.
The idea isn't all that crazy, said Mike Ernst, a professor of kinesiology at California State University in Dominguez Hills.
"I think it's silly but at the same time if somehow, some way it promotes physical activity, gets kids active, then I'm all for it," Ernst said.
The more he thought about it, the more Ernst said he could see the benefit, adding that the act of jumping, not the rope itself, is what provides exercise.
"Do you need to jump with a rope? You don't," Ernst said. "But I wouldn't buy the product, I can tell you that. I'm not an idiot."
High-tech handles aren't needed. You could even use toilet paper holders, Ernst said. On second thought, he wondered if he could patent that idea.

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Patentlysilly: http://www.patentlysilly.com

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KIEV (Reuters) - A man shouting that God would keep him safe was mauled to death by a lioness in Kiev zoo after he crept into the animal's enclosure, a zoo official said on Monday.

"The man shouted 'God will save me, if he exists', lowered himself by a rope into the enclosure, took his shoes off and went up to the lions," the official said.

"A lioness went straight for him, knocked him down and severed his carotid artery."

The incident, Sunday evening when the zoo was packed with visitors, was the first of its kind at the attraction. Lions and tigers are kept in an "animal island" protected by thick concrete blocks.

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Those crazy Ukranians and their "religion"

Dateline: Germany— Social workers refused to help a worried mother after she called the youth department of social services in Hildesheim, Lower Saxony, to complain about her daughter’s “uncontrollable, immoral and loose behavior with men.” The problem? Mrs. Schmidt was 92 years old and her daughter Tina was 68. Social workers told the woman they could not help her as her “child” was 50 years past the age limit where social services can get involved. Mrs. Schmidt apparently called the youth department after learning Tina had a boyfriend.

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Dateline: Washington-- Providing further proof (as if any were necessary) that drinking and dynamite don’t mix is the story of three Seattle men who were seriously injured in a fireworks accident last Thursday. Investigator told KOMO TV that the victims were part of a group of 10 or 12 construction workers having a barbecue at a KOA campground in Lewis County. One of the men came over to the campfire and showed off a powerful illegal firework that was about 5 inches long and an inch thick. Another man tossed it into the burning fire, but it failed to light. Naturally, he reached into the fire to retrieve it. A family member told KOMO 4 News one of the other construction workers tried to stop him from grabbing it, and in the process, the device went off. Police say two men lost their hands in the explosion and suffered other head and facial injuries. They were both airlifted to Harborview Medical Center in Seattle. The third man, who was walking nearby, also suffered head injuries and a possible eye fracture. Investigators believe the men had been drinking.

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[IMG]http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b189/bladderface/boring-jas-fam.jpg[/IMG]

It's the boring family. But where art thou Matclarke?

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Poo perhaps?

let's play the feud!

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what if nigger meant kite

http://www.gamespot.com/news/show_blog_entry.php?topic_id=24707327&sid=6152650

Apparently Uwe Boll is tire of people slamming his crappy movies and claims that those who insult his work haven't even seen his movies. (BloodRayne, anyone?)

His latest production, Postal, wil feature, at the end of the film, footage of Boll and ten critics of his selection in boxing matches. The critis will each have a ten-round match to try and take down Boll.

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

I really don't think Postal is going to make a great movie. The games were pretty fun, mostly because they were just over-the-top funny, violent games. I don't think a movie is really going to surpass or even meet the game.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

PALM SPRINGS, Fla. - Call it the bling sting. Detectives had been watching the Blue Diamond Jewelry shop for a month after getting reports that its workers were fitting customers with gold teeth caps using filthy equipment.
Some clients had no problems with their shiny new "grills." Others were not so fortunate and suffered severe infections.

The amateur, unlicensed dentists cast the grills using filthy tools stored in a cluttered back room amid trash and debris and even adjusted customers' teeth plates with dirty pliers before reinserting them, unwashed, into clients' mouths, authorities said.

Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office detectives put an end to the dirty dentistry and shut down the business Wednesday in an undercover sting.

Sarah V. Encarnacion, 39, was arrested just as she was about to place caps inside the mouth of an undercover sheriff's investigator.

Encarnacion is charged with unlawful practice of dentistry, proprietorship of non-dentist, and working in an unlawful dental laboratory.

"It's just disgusting," said Detective Lori Gunn, who learned of the infected customers about a month ago from the Florida Department of Health. "It's completely unsanitary."

No telephone number was listed under Encarnacion's name.

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That's just how we roll, yo.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Please pay close attention to the third paragraph:

MINNEAPOLIS (AP) - A convenience-store videotape recorded after a March crash involving Eddie Griffin shows the Minnesota Timberwolves forward told store employees that he was drunk and he didn't want to go to jail.

The Minneapolis Police Department is investigating whether two officers who responded to the accident failed to ticket Griffin for suspected drunken driving after he crashed into a parked car.
Meanwhile, the owner of the damaged vehicle and his brother have sued Griffin and the city, claiming Griffin tried to bribe them and that their civil rights were violated when officers failed to conduct a proper criminal investigation.

The suit alleges Griffin was drunk and masturbating when he crashed his luxury SUV into a parked Suburban outside a store in Minneapolis while watching porn on a flip down dvd, according to the lawsuit filed Thursday.

Griffin told the St. Paul Pioneer Press after the accident that he crashed his car because he was reaching for a cell phone that had fallen off his lap. But the lawsuit alleges the crash occurred because Griffin was "under the influence of alcohol" and masturbating while watching pornography on a TV set in his dashboard.

In the early morning of March 30, Griffin, 24, hit a car near the intersection of University and 6th Avenues. Witnesses said Griffin then went into a convenience store and told employees he was drunk.

Portions of a store videotape viewed by The Associated Press on WCCO-TV's Web site backs up those statements. It shows Griffin saying he was drunk and that he didn't want to go jail. The tape also shows that Griffin offered to buy the owner of the damaged sport-utility vehicle any type of new car or truck he wanted, "but not a Bentley."

Messages left Friday with Griffin's agent and his attorney were not immediately returned to The Associated Press.

The Star Tribune reported that it had viewed the entire 50-minute videotape, which shows a Minneapolis police officer saying, "He's not getting a DWI," and "We're taking him home to St. Paul."

The police report filed after the incident said the crash happened because Griffin wasn't paying attention to the road. Griffin received misdemeanor citations for driving without a license and for inattentive driving.

Several witnesses said they told officers Daniel Anderson and Matthew Lindquist that Griffin was drunk, but the police report does not say whether officers gave Griffin blood-alcohol or field-sobriety tests. Police are investigating whether the officers violated department policy when they drove Griffin to his home in St. Paul — officers must contact a supervisor before leaving city limits.

Anderson and Lindquist remain on duty during the internal investigation. Police administration could not comment because of the investigation, according to a department spokesman.

A lawsuit filed Thursday in Ramsey County District Court alleges that Griffin was watching a pornographic DVD in his sport-utility vehicle and masturbating at the time of the crash. The lawsuit was filed by Jamal Hassuneh, the owner of the damaged vehicle, and his brother, Lindsey.

It seeks $50,000 in compensatory damages.

The lawsuit also alleges Griffin was drunk and tried to bribe them into canceling a 911 call to police. It accuses interim police chief Timothy Dolan and the responding officers of violating their civil rights by improperly investigating the incident.

The plaintiffs are demanding a jury trial. An attorney for the Hassunehs, Michael Padden, told the St. Paul Pioneer Press that both sides had been negotiating a settlement, but he did not say whether talks were ongoing.

A message left for Padden by the AP was not immediately returned Friday.

Timberwolves spokesman Mike Cristaldi told newspapers the lawsuit was an issue between Griffin and the plaintiffs. He did not immediately return a phone call to the AP.

Griffin, who joined the Timberwolves in October 2004, had undergone alcohol-abuse treatment in the past.

He was drafted by New Jersey in 2001 and was traded to the Houston Rockets, where he played two seasons. In fall 2003, the Rockets suspended him for missing practices and a team flight, and that same week, he was arrested for marijuana possession.

Later that year, he was charged with felony assault for allegedly beating and shooting a gun at a woman in his Houston home. That charge was pleaded down to a misdemeanor, but Griffin violated his probation and was sentenced to 15 days in jail last summer.

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By "a cell phone," he meant his penis. And "had fallen off his lap" means "had become erect because he was watching pornography while driving drunk." So you see the story is totally true.

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What others say about boorite!

HANOI, Vietnam - After nearly two decades of ridicule, a father has agreed to change his son's name from "Fined Six Thousand and Five Hundred" — the amount he was forced to pay in local currency for ignoring Vietnam's two-child policy.
Angry he was being fined for having a fifth child, Mai Xuan Can named his son Mai Phat Sau Nghin Ruoi after the amount he was forced to pay — 6,500 dong (50 cents), said Dai Cuong village chief Nguyen Huy Thuong.

In 1999, local government officials tried to persuade Can to change the name because the boy was constantly being teased by classmates at school. But Can, a former People's Committee official, refused to back down, Thuong said. They appealed to him again recently, and this time it worked.

"I told him that as his son is growing up, he should have another name — not that weird name — and he finally agreed," Thuong said.

The son, now 19, finally got a new name: Mai Hoang Long, which means golden dragon.

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quote:

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Mai Hoang Long, which means my gigantic cock.

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So 50 cents is like a month's pay over there, right?

Year's salary.

MOSCOW, Russia (Reuters) -- Vladimir Putin's decision to stop a small boy as he walked through the Kremlin and kiss his stomach was prompted by a desire to "touch him like a kitten," the Russian president said on Thursday.

The five-year-old boy, identified as Nikita Konkin by the press, was clearly stunned by the kiss and speculation over Putin's motivation has run wild in the week since it happened.

Curious Internet users propelled the issue to the top of a list of questions put to Putin in an interactive Web cast.

"People came up and I began talking to them, among them this little boy. He seemed to me very independent, sure of himself and at the same time defenseless so to speak, an innocent boy and a very nice little boy," Putin told the Web cast.

"I tell you honestly, I just wanted to touch him like a kitten and that desire of mine ended in that act."

The Izvestia daily, which tracked down Nikita, discovered that he had refused to wash after that kiss.

"I just liked him and he liked me very much. I want to be president myself," the five-year-old told the paper.

Putin was shown by state television chatting to graduates of military academies before he took a walk through one of the Kremlin's courtyards, often full of tourists.

He stopped and spoke to Nikita who turned away shyly. "What is your name?" Putin asked, kneeling down in front of the fair-haired boy and holding him by the waist.

"Nikita," the clearly shocked boy answered, looking from side to side.

Putin then lifted the boy's shirt and kissed him on his stomach. The Russian president then patted the boy on the head and walked off through a crowd of astonished tourists

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SHAMED Big Brother contestant Michael "Ashley" Cox has apologised to Australia for causing any offence - but he maintains he did not do anything wrong when he rubbed his groin in the face of housemate Camilla Halliwell.

Cox, 20, said he was horrified after initial reports labelled the incident - which saw him "turkey slap" Halliwell while she was restrained in bed by fellow housemate Michael "John" Bric - an alleged sexual assault.

"I felt sick when I heard that," he said.

"I would never hurt a woman.

"Sexual assault to me is where someone has actually been assaulted and I didn't feel Camilla was assaulted at all.

"It was just a joke - a fun gesture with no malice - with someone I've been living with 24 hours a day for 70 days. There was nothing sexual in it.

"The whole thing was totally blown out of proportion."

Cox - who was removed from the compound with Bric, 21, by producers 12 hours after last week's Saturday morning incident - said he did not feel he did anything wrong to his female housemate.

"If I have offended anyone - especially any women around Australia - I am very sorry," he said. "If Camilla considers it to be wrong, then I will definitely apologise to her. We never felt she was ever distressed in any way or angry - she was laughing with us and tickling me and John afterwards.

"We're such good friends and if Camilla had it her way, we would have stayed in the house."

The self-employed suburban Perth bricklayer, who returns to work tomorrow, said he was distressed and angry about being forced out of the house and missing out on saying goodbye to his friends.

He said the program's handling of the incident, which proved a publicity boon, had severely damaged his reputation.

"If they didn't make it an issue by kicking us out, it wouldn't be such a big deal," he said.

"Last year, two similar incidents occurred and both of them didn't get kicked out. They (producers) could have put Michael and I both up for eviction and seen if our actions made voters want us to be out of the house.

"I don't want to be known as the sleazy guy from Big Brother. I'm just an everyday bloke who made one mistake that everybody is judging him on - I feel very embarrassed.

"I hope people will judge me for the whole 10 weeks and think 'this guy's not too bad', rather than on the one little stuff-up."

He said he was shocked that the incident had prompted widespread criticism and calls for the program to be taken off the air. "I was dumbfounded when I heard about John Howard and the other politicians getting involved and wanting to scrap Big Brother," he said.

"It's just a reality TV show."

Cox, who has had counselling sessions with the show's psychologist every day since being booted off the program, counted the fall-out as one of the worst experiences of his life.

"Emotionally, it has been very stressful - you are in the house all lovey-dovey with everyone and then, bang, you're out the next minute," he said.

"It has been a rollercoaster - not to the stage where I was crying and heartbroken, but pretty close.

"I definitely do feel robbed - if I'd stayed in there, I could have won and it would have made my life a lot easier. I've come out of the house in more debt than when I went in, with the mortgage and car repayments and all the bills.

"I would have liked a change in my profession but under the circumstances, I think it has ruined my chances now."

Cox, who missed out on the prizes given to each housemate after eviction, is yet to find out whether he and Bric will be allowed to take part in the show's upcoming reunion finale episode.

One thing is for sure - Cox will never "turkey-slap" anyone ever again. "It was a first and, obviously, it's going to be a last - that's a lesson I've learned," he laughed.

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sweet

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whats up i am sebra 139

Cox

lewl

I went to a grade school with a kid named Mike Cox

I went to school with a guy named Jack Gass
and another guys father was named Dick Fagg....
Truth.

not much of a turkey slap but oh well

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