The Newlydead Game by kaufman 11-11-04

Welcome back to the Newlydead Game, the show where the dearly departed see how much they know about each other. Let's meet today's contestants. Hello, I'm Marlon Brando. I'm Christopher Reeve. And lookee here, a new face. I guess Bob Keeshan finally got a bit too gamy. What's your name? Yassir Arafat.

The Newlydead Game by kaufman 11-11-04

Question 1: What was Marge Schott's biggest regret in life? That her Reds coulda been contenders. I'm sorry Marlon, that is incorrect. That she couldn't have realized her dream of seeing a race of Supermen built. Correct, for 5 points! That she didn't kill more Jews. You're also correct. Let's give a big hand for our newcomer.

The Newlydead Game by kaufman 11-11-04

Question 2: How did Jan Berry describe the voice of singing partner Dean Torrence? STELLLLLLAAAAR! Correct, and Marlon Brando is on the board. More powerful than a speading locomotive. I'm sorry, that is not correct. As annoying as the Zionist presence in Palestine. Nope, and we now have a three-way tie for the lead.

The Newlydead Game by kaufman 11-11-04

Question 3: How did Ray Charles describe the challenge of being blind? It was an obstacle he couldn't refuse. It wasn't any real challenge. It was as easy as falling off a horse. He felt oppressed like a people who have lived for generations in an occupied land. I'm sorry, the correct answer is it helped him pick up younger women. Or was that the Tony Randall answer? We'd better go to a ommercial.

The Newlydead Game by kaufman 11-11-04

Question 4: This is an audio daily double. Listen to the voice. Hello. This is Rodney Dangerfield. I don't get no respect. On my wedding night, my wife blank. Tangoed in Paris. While I was in Cleveland. Christopher? Just lay there motionless. Yassir? Bulldozed my house.

Some reference material taken from http://www.stiffs.com/recentdeaths.cfm

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

You've GOT to do two more of these. They were awesome.

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

All hail King Kaufman! Congrats on TOO GRAND, too.

I bet poor Bob Keeshan is rolling over in his ping-pong-ball-filled grave.

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