Nothing On | by Scyess 1-02-05

There's nothing on. I should go get some exercise. Or at least clean up the house. I could start my novel! I could take up kick-boxing! I could learn the tango! I could start a company and make a billion dollars. I could become arm-wrestling champion of the world!!! But then again, this couch is pretty comfortable... Uh oh. Looks like someone has a case of TV Inertia.

Nothing On ][ by Scyess 1-02-05

I think Jon's come down with a case of TV Inertia. Can you go check on him? **drool** Nah. There's only about a quarter inch of dust on him. Maybe we'd better fake a power outage, just in case.

Nothing On ]|[ by Scyess 1-02-05

*PFFT!* Oh Jesus! The power went out... there's no TV!! Wait!! Wait... don't panic... remain calm... AAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY YYYYYYIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!! I think you watch too much TV. Quiet, woman! Can't you see I'm busy panicking!?

Nothing On |V by Scyess 1-02-05

There's no TV! How am I going to know what people on the street are saying? How am I going to see wildlife? How am I going to stay informed? How am I going to keep track of fashion trends, local events, or weather information?!?? You could go outside. Outs-... I don't follow.

Nothing On V by Scyess 1-02-05

*PFFT!* Okay, the power's back on, but don't celebrate just yet. No more TV for you. You have to go out and actually interact with other actual life forms. Aw, man. *sigh* Hey, Earl. Hey, Jon. So did you catch that episode of Raymond the other night? Hell yeah! That Raymond is da bomb! Didja see Drew?

---
"Old" is the old new.

And, of course...

Nothing On V| -- Irrelevant Epilogue by Scyess 1-02-05

This... is your brain... This is your brain on TV. Hey, everybody! I just flew out of Jon's skull, and boy are my lobes tired! **laughtrack** Any questions? That is some seriously fucked-up shit right there. No kidding. Your duodenum was much funner last week on Leno.

---
"Old" is the old new.

Funny stuff.