The Diet by Jeanster 2-09-04

I'm off to the grocery store, Tweetsie. Be right back. Hey, I thought I saw a Kitty Cat! Well, isn't that thoughtful of Granny. *BURP!* She remembered that I'm on the high-protein/low-carb diet.

One of the many reasons I stopped going to church by Jeanster 2-16-04

The man of the cloth addresses his congregation. I've noticed that some of you have been coming to Sunday morning service dressed very casually. Tee-shirts, shorts, cutoffs, sandals. Show some respect to the Lord when you come to church! I expect to see an improvement in your attire when you come back next Sunday. The following week the entire congregation shows up dressed in their Sunday best. My sermon today is about how God can see right through you. He can see you for the sinners you are, despite how you may present yourself on the outside! You're not fooling Him!

Poor Todd by Jeanster 2-17-04

See that bridge over there? I built that. But do you think folks around here would call me Todd the Bridge Builder? No-o-o-o-o. And see that wall over there? I built that, too. But do you think I'd be known around here as Todd the Wall Builder? Oh, no-o-o-o-o. But when they catch you fucking one goat . . .

What if Willow Rosenberg lurked at the SC Forum? by Jeanster 2-15-04

At the "Fights Go Here" SC Forum . . . Using "gay" as an insult makes you an asshat! Shut up! This thead is so gay! Gay, gay, gay! Lurking lesbian witch Willow Rosenberg has had enough. Bored now. So Willow does her thing. Ack! What the fuck happened to my computer??!!

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A good friend will come and bail you out of jail...but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn...that was fun!"

Poor Todd was my favorite!

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dcomposed:11-06-05: If I was a viking invading your village, you'd be the first to get raped.
Crabby: 10/5/06: i would love to feed you fresh fruit while bathing you.

I agree, "Poor Todd" was excellently excellent.

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"In a thousand years there will be no men and women just wankers and that's fine by me."

Poor Todd was good, if unoriginal.

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"If you can't keep it in your pants, keep it in your family"

Reruns!

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Batman created by Bob Kane

quote:

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One of the many reasons I stopped going to church

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I really liked the one about church. That has never, ever made sense to me either.

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

That's why people need to start showing up dressed as clowns, prostitutes, Australians, and naked.

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

Please, not Australians. Have some decency, man!

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

Maybe that's a bit extreme, but I think the church needs a shake-up.

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.