Hummers, Bush and Hookers. No, this is not CNN. by DragonXero 7-01-05

Hey baby, I got a ten-spot. I'm not on the job little buddy. Oh come on, just a quick hummer behind the bush. But the President is inside and his car is in the garage! After a joke like that, I think you should pay ME twenty bucks to blow me.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Johnny Cash would be proud of this comic. Or not. One of the two.

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

I had a boss once who got drunk at a company outing (at a racetrack). He was buying so I kept drinking with him. He had recently married a fair looking lady with killer legs. "There is just one thing that can keep a relationship on track, Spanky." he told me. Then he knit his brow ridge at me and gave me the secret. His wisdom. "Hummers."

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

That's a great story Spankling. I'm sure Johnny Cash would approve.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

When they started rereleasing the Star Wars movies in the theaters in the mid late 90s, Taco Bell was giving away a Star Wars Hummer. After careful thought, I decided I would like my Star Wars Hummer to be given to me by Yoda, with Princess Leia in slave garb a close second.

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.