Funny thing is, I can visualize the real
characters saying these things in a real bust!

Book 'em, Danno by pita 3-11-02

Alright, you guys, line up over here by the fence, and give me your licenses one at a time. First, you. You were the one driving ? Yes sir, officer, sir !!! Don't pay any attention to him, he's a smart - aleck when he's drunk ! Man, I wish you guys would make up your minds ! One day you take my license away and the next you expect me to show it to you ! I knew we weren't gonna get anywhere in a stolen car. Say, you aren't going to look in the trunk, are ya ?

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

Could you please tell your pants it's not polite to point ? by pita 3-16-02

Hey, buddy, what's wrong? Well, you know that girl I wanted to ask out but every time I even looked at her I'd get an erection? I finally got up enough nerve to call her and ask her out. OK, that's a good thing, right? When are you going out? The date was this evening. But I was worried I'd get an erection, so I duct - taped my penis to my leg. I got to her house, rang the bell, and she answered wearing the most beautiful dress... Well, what happened then? I kicked her in the face!

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

I'm not up on my Irish dialect, but it was the best I could come up with...

Blasted Thieves by pita 3-17-02

Can I help ye, laddie? Somebody stole me car! Well, where was it last time ye saw it? 'Twas at the end of me keys! Uh, are ye aware yer exposin' yerself, son? Yer hangin' out all over the place! Oh, Lawd, they've got me girl, too!

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

Idea stolen from Drew Carey the other night -
he dates a pregnant woman who says she's been
craving Cantonese food, and he says he doesn't
feel like driving all the way to Canton (Ohio)
for dinner.

I may be a drunk, but I'm NOT prejudiced! by pita 3-17-02

Man, I'd like to take that chick out fer a drink! Oh, her? Don't bother, she's a lesbian. Oh, that doesn't bother me... I'm gonna ask her out anyway. Suit yourself. Sooooooo... what part of Lesbia are you from?

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

That Lesbia one's a classic. :)

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