Yeah, I know that "Immacculate" is misspelled. Bite me. Enjoy the series!

Epic Quest of Mythical Proportions (01) by DragonXero 6-24-02

Good day, Axion. Hello, Spectre. I need to ask you a huge favor. Very well, what is thy favor? I have found my love missing. She is being held in the Cave of Incomprehensible Darkness, and we must retrieve the Gem of Immaulate Beauty to gain access. Wanna help? Only if you give me some Vanilla Coke.

Epic Quest (02) by DragonXero 6-24-02

Very well Axion, Vanilla Coke, elixer of the gods, ye shall have. SCROE! What? Um, never mind. Anyway, where do we find this Gem of Immaculate Beauty? It is deep within the Pits of Terrifying Pain. ... Better make that a 12 pack of Vanilla Cokes...

Epic Quest (03) by DragonXero 6-24-02

Our unlikely heroes begin their amazing quest... So, we just have to go in and snag the gem, then rush off to the cave and rescue your woman? Well..... Not exactly. Uh-oh... There are five Demons of Anguish we must face. The peril will be great, but we shall succeed. Y'know what? I think I'm gonna need at LEAST a 24 pack of Vanilla Coke, a 12 pack of Pepsi Twist and an extra lage pizza. Canadan Bacon. AND NO PINEAPPLE! Done, and done.

Epic Quest (04) by DragonXero 6-24-02

As our protagonists pass through Borganville... So, Spectre, how *exactly* are we to defeat these foes you speak of? Well, you have your razor-sharp claw gloves, some excellent fighting ability, and intellect... Yeah.... And I'm a mage. Plus I have this magic scythe, should prove useful. I guess you're right. If all else fails, I still have my backup weapon. Screaming and running away like a sissy. Ah yes, many a time you've used that mighty weapon on the bullies back in school.

Epic Quest (05) by DragonXero 6-24-02

I've been thinking. I would like some of that Vanilla Coke before we go off into peril. After all, I may not be around to accept it later. Why do you say that? Well, my "screaming and running away like a sissy" attack has it's downfalls. Oh? What would those be? It doesn't work when I have a demon's claw through my forehead. Ah yes, I suppose you're right. Well, if that happens, I'll adopt it for you, and drink all the soda in your absence.

[Click to view comic: 'Epic Quest (06)']
[Click to view comic: 'Epic Quest (07)']
[Click to view comic: 'Epic Quest (08)']
[Click to view comic: 'Epic Quest (09)']
[Click to view comic: 'Epic Quest (10)']

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Guest Appearance by Surly Dragon!

Epic Quest (11) by DragonXero 6-24-02

And thus, the night fell, and our heroes slept with no trouble. Morning would break soon, and the quest would continue anew. The Gem of Immaculate Beauty.... HEY, would you shut the fuck up? We're trying to sleep! I hope he doesn't babble this much through the whole quest.

Epic Quest (12) by DragonXero 6-24-02

The next morning... *yawn* How was your slumber? Quite refreshing, did you sleep well? Nope, that damn narrator kept me up most of the night. Sucks to be you. HEY, do you asses want me to quit? DO YOU?! Yeah, he is such a loudmouth asshole. I concurr.

Epic Quest (13) by DragonXero 6-24-02

Our Heroes continue on their Quest... Need... Vanilla... Coke... I told you, no more until we get the Gem. We can stop at another Inn and get food later. Suddenly!! HOLY SHIT!! A dragon!! *rawr* What're you looking at, you pissy bitch? A surly one, at that. You will move aside and let us pass. *snort* Sure thing, you silly cunt, right after I swallow you and your buddy whole.

Epic Quest (14) by DragonXero 6-24-02

Oh no! This is our first peril!! BEGONE, MONSTER! What're you gonna do? Hit me with your stick thing? I will destroy you with my magic! Feel it surging through you! Bah, feel THIS! OWWW!!!!! *snort* Bastard.

Epic Quest (15) by DragonXero 6-24-02

Ye shall not escape that easy, monster. Fire doesn't hurt! Pity. I'll have to claw you to death then. Kamis Ti Surnus Omni ACK! Well, that was easy.

[Click to view comic: 'Epic Quest (16)']
[Click to view comic: 'Epic Quest (17)']
[Click to view comic: 'Epic Quest (18)']
[Click to view comic: 'Epic Quest (19)']
[Click to view comic: 'Epic Quest (20)']

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Epic Quest (21) by DragonXero 6-24-02

What Axion sees... Mmmm... Athlon.... What Spectre sees. Mmmm, sweet stimulant... Can we just keep it? It's not real. Though, after two days of going without, I wish it were.

Thus ends the first chapter of this epic story. Chapter two soon...

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Hah! Do more! Quickly!

Great stuff. Roll on chapter two!

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

*bump*

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

i concur.

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UK PEOPLE. GET ON IRC, DAMNIT. (7pm -> 12pm GMT)