bobijorite presents: Harv Spangler, Attorney at Law by ObiJo 7-30-02

Deep in the heart of Spangler Central, the Phone of Litigation and Occasional Crank Calls Cause Hell It's A Free Country and I'll Harass You If I Want To bursts to life. Ring a ling a ling boo bop ba diddly ring Harv Spangler, attorney at law. You do the crime, we'll bust a rhyme. Mr. Spangler? This is Harry Greaselicker. I find myself in a bit of trouble with the law and thought you could help. No details over the phone. Come down to my office. 110 E. West Street. I'm in my parents' basement. Say 3:30? I'll be there. *click* Now to find my associate.

Harv Spangler, Scene 2: Brains of the operation by boorite 7-30-02

Ah, Rex, my trusty sidekick. I have a client coming at 3:30 for a meet. MEAT. Meet. his name is Harry Greaselicker, and... HARRY GREASELICKER. HAW HAW HAW. It is a rather humorous name. SO YOU WANT I BACKGROUND HIM? OR JUST EAT HIS FUCKING HEAD?

The duality that is I by ObiJo 7-30-02

I'm Harry Greaselicker. I'm here to see Mr. Spangler. *Second Panel* ARG! HOW BOUT MR. MOLAR INSTEAD ASS WEAZLE!!! BUT RENTS NEARLY DUE... THIS WAY GREASY LICHEN

Harv scene 4: There is none so blind as a blind person by boorite 7-30-02

Oops, I bumped into the coffee maker. Sorry. In all the recent, uh, troubles, I've lost my glasses. DICKHEAD. MR. AT-LAW, MEAT IS HERE. BACKGROUND: NO RAP SHEET. BUT HE IS A DICKHEAD. Thank you, Rex. Send him in. Wow, your secretary is HOT. Yes, it turns out they're endothermic. Fancy that. Now, your legal troubles?

The Mix Thickens by ObiJo 7-30-02

I was caught with my dick in a Brownie. Someone else's or your own? I have no kids. JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION, SICKO! I think you've misunder Listen, you sick pastry prickin punk -- I MIGHT be able to keep you out of the chamber, but only if you work with me. Now...Almonds, yes or no?

[Click to view comic: 'Harv scene 6: f/stop']
[Click to view comic: 'Conversationalist']
[Click to view comic: 'Harv, scene 8: Single entendre']
[Click to view comic: 'If I knock out your teeth will I be charged a retainer?']
[Click to view comic: 'Harv, 10: Rack 'em']
[Click to view comic: 'GO GO GADGET DEFENSE TEAM']
[Click to view comic: 'Bird is the word.']
[Click to view comic: 'Just when you thought it was safe to come out of the closet']
[Click to view comic: 'Harv rain is gonna fall']
[Click to view comic: 'EXCEPT FOR MY COMPLETE IGNORANCE OF THE LAW']
[Click to view comic: 'The best defense is a brain the size of a walnut']
[Click to view comic: '...']
[Click to view comic: 'See you in the showers']

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What others say about boorite!

Fucking excellent series guys, the last panel is quite possibly my favourite, great punchline!

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Dad was flammable

Brilliant. Still laughing.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Bizarre. Yet Amusing. Like seeing a pile of chopped off penises and being drawn strangely towards them, despite the voice in your head saying \"Theres a machine down there that chops off your dick\".

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

Kramer, you cunt, that's worse than the motorcycle accident guy from rotten.com

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Dad was flammable

Darius will take over from Gareth the Spastic at number 1 this week.

WONT THAT BE FUN!

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

I'm going to rent a channel on Sky Digital and just display a test picture of my face 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Soon the public will learn to love me, even though they have no idea who I am and I have no talent whatsoever. I'll be on the front of magazines, on daytime TV, I might even get a spot in the Sainsbury's adverts with Jamie Oliver.

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Dad was flammable

Great. As if those ads didn't induce enough homicidal fury already.

Someone's already done that. On Sky Digital there's a channel called "Vibe TV" which exists purely to plug the album of some crappy singer woman called Angelle. It turns out her boyfriend is seriously loaded and bought her the channel. Her single is out this week. Fingers crossed it gets to number 87 or something.

And I have no problem with Darius. He could have taken the easy option, and accepted Simon Cowell's offer of a record contract singing crappy covers in a Will/Gareth stylee. But instead he turned it down so he could get his own deal writing his own material. Fair play to him.

But he's a dick.

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Dad was flammable

Get the spray, boo. We got Scottish.

I mean, thank you all for your compliments on the sereis, which I can only assume are written is some kind of Scottish armpit-fart code.

Truth is, boorite deserves credit for that series. I'm not concentrating too well lately and missed some beautifully lobbed setups he made, be he still found a way to make it funny.

So funny, I'm starting to wonder if he sold his soul to satan1-2. (I WILL make that phrase a household word, just give me time.)

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

I actually have no problem with Darius going to #1 , and i hope his album continues to piss all over those other Pop Idol wankers , particularly the annoying black 16yr old who seems to have disappeared from sight since she got knocked out.

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

He's the one we should give some respect to, a loser who actually fucked off after the contest. Well done, it's just a game show at the end of the day, I fail to see why the losers are famous.

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TRY NEW JOHNSON'S ASS CREAM, THE ONLY ASS-CREAM THAT THE GUY WHO LOST ON "WHEEL OF FORTUNE" EVER USES!

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Dad was flammable