I got a motorcycle!

yay!

It's a Yamaha DOCH 750cc Windjammer that looks identical to this other than it's silver and black and it doesn't currently have the windjammer, hard bags, or back cushion on it (though i do own them all).

With a bike like this, it won't be long till lara succumbs and sends me a nude pic of herself.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

On the bike?

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Carry the battle to them. Don't let them bring it to you. Put them on the defensive. And don't ever apologize for anything. - Harry S Truman, 33rd president of US (1884 - 1972)

Eating an all-meat diet. Getting around by motorcycle. Tell you what: I'll pay the premiums if you name me as the beneficiary.

Seriously, Phoenix drivers are shit. Don't let some asshole run over your head.

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What others say about boorite!

Boss bike, btw. Wish I had one, but my wife won't let me. She won't let me have a chainsaw, either. Damn.

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What others say about boorite!

My dad had one a long time ago. He got in a big accident with it and doesn't ride them anymore.

Chainsaws are fun. My dad taught me how to use a big two-stroke one when I was a kid - no wussy electric chainsaw for me!

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

but she will let you have nude pictures of me, right?

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When they invent BookFace, I'm -there-.

That would be rather redundant seeing as how I took the pictures.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

But riding a chainsaw is so much fun!!!

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

If you mounted the chainsaw on the front of the bike it'd probably be much safer.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

For a non-Harley that kicks ass.

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

Congratulations. You and me have to go riding sometime. I'll take you out to all the roughest and toughest biker bars. We'll go brawling and whoring. We'll start up our own meth lab in a trailer out by the abandoned quarry. It'll be great!

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

Biker Update Number 1 - Sunday, the Day of our Lord: I'm going to pick up my bike soon. My bike. A sign of man manliness. A sign of my virility. A macho manly sign of virile manly machismo.

But since I don't feel comfortable driving it on the highway yet, I'm having my sister's lesbian girlfriend drive it home for me.

Biker Update Number 2 - Monday, the Day of Traci Lords: Took my bike out for a couple of miles today, learning to shift gears. It ran great to my brother's house, about 3 miles away. But a couple of hours later when I was driving it home, it died a mile away.

I couldn't get it restarted, so I knocked on a door and got some water and waited a half an hour. Jumped back on my bike (my bike) and got it running. I'm thinking it's a carberator, ignition, or maybe fuel problem.

A block later it dies again.

5 minutes later I get it started again.

30 seconds later it dies again. I try to get it started and it won't start. Either by the push start or kick starting.

I knock on a door again, and get a ride back to my brother's house.

Swimming, tanning, and trout and salmon eating come to pass.

And it is nighttime. My mom drives me over to get my bike (my bike) but it won't start. She drives me to get some gas and I put it in and it starts.

I rev the fuck out of it. vroom vroom! I go. Traci Lords, how I go! I make it home and turn off the ignition, sure that I was just a big goober who didn't check the gas.

An hour passes.

For peace of mind, I decide to go out and check that my bike (my bike) will start up again.

It doesn't. I'm back to thinking it may be a carbeurator, ignition, or fuel line problem.

I'm not worried though. Now I have it under my porch, where I can work on it till my heart's content.

And if I, manly man that I am, can't figure it out, at least I have the comfort of knowing that my sister's lesbian girlfriend is a mechanic and can help me fix my bike.

My bike.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

quote:

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but she will let you have nude pictures of me, right?

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