All comics by KiD

Profile

 

by KiD
9-09-02
I am a surly alcoholic! I would like to sodomize the likes of you.
Uhh... OK i guess...
Oh golly, i'm sorry miss, I didn't mean to say that...
duhhh..... (drools, stumbles away)
Three Hours Later...
SIKE! Dumb bitch...
WATCH THE FUCKING LANGUAGE!!!

 

by KiD
9-09-02
Somewhere in Norhteast Philly, 2PM
I play either Super Nintendo or Pocketball all day!
Yo Dawg, I be dippin' yo' pockets!
My dad gets drunk and throws me down the stairs.
This is robbery, I be's a roothless thug. Gimme yo' doh!
I don't want to play this anymore, Frankie. Lets go play Pokemon.
Alright! I'll get my mom to make rice krispie squares!

 

by KiD
9-09-02
HUMAN MEAT PROCESSING PLANT, NICARAGUA (OR SOME OTHER HISPANIC COUNTRY)
Here it is, my last day on earth.
It sure is...
It sucks that i'm spending my final moments before being processed into foodstuffs talking to a chicken.
I'm goin now. Chicken processing plant's calling...
Oh well, I put in a good run.
Alright, time for the grinder, buddy.

 

by KiD
9-10-02
Here's my cat, boss.
Deee-Lightful!
Yum Yum! NEXT
Here's my baby, boss.
Deee-Lightful!

 

by KiD
9-10-02
What the fuck are we supposed to be?!?!
I always figured we were some type of trolls or elves... Some shit like that.
ARGAHABLEAH!!!!!!!! I AM JESUS, MASTER OF TOMFOOLERY! GIVE ME YOUR WALLET!
I'm gonna get drunk and sodomize you, Master of Tomfoolery!
TODAY IS KID'S BIRTHDAY!
It sure is.
Happy birthday, you fucking prick.

 

by KiD
9-10-02
Hmm, this letter tells me that I owe Blockbuster $654 in late tapes, which include "Dogs: Man's Best Fuckdoll" and "How to Properly Sever your Penis: 12 Easy Steps"
It also says that they are sending a collection agency to collect the money and that the collection agency will be here around the time this letter arrives. I better be quick then...
SUCKER!

 

by KiD
9-12-02
I just HAD to go out at 2 AM, just had to. I was rather wasted, and just slightly surly. I was looking for a bum, an alley cat, or prehaps a prostitute to mutilate.
If I could somehow get a dollar, I could probably eat tonight, probably 7-11. Maybe the prostitute I kill will have a dollar. I still wonder what ever happened to my fingers...
Oh, joy, a bum!

 

by KiD
9-12-02
I am a fucking waste of life.
I am a squirrel. You probably dont know this, but squirrels are secret devices placed into the streets by the government in order to spy on the people.
I hope the rest of this bottle of liquid drano offs me pretty soon. Dead sounds fine to me.
I have said too much... time to go chew on some electric cables.
Hey where did you go magical squirrel? Now life's DEFINATELY not worth living...
Alright buddy, we're looking for a secret squirrell. He was last seen around here.

 

by KiD
10-02-03
I've beem staring at faces all day
because earlier I caught a glimpse of her
and maybe I’ll find her again
Lame

 

by KiD
10-03-03
Today's your 18th birthday................... And I would make a bet....................... That by noon tomorrow........................ I'll see you naked on the net................
There was a time when I loved you..... When we both were young.................. But now all I can think about............... Is puncturing your lung........................
I wonder why I never killed you........... Although I had it all planned............... I guess youre just the luckiest.............. Junkie Whore in all the land................. DIE FUCKER! LOVE KID

 

by KiD
12-02-03
STEAK KNIFE IN YOUR THROAT.
Did you know you can rearrange the letters in "Ashley Noel Arabia" to read "A: One Lye Labia Rash"?
Is that so?
BLEED FOR ME YOU CUNT.
I DONT LIKE YOU VERY MUCH.
I have AIDS.
Tell it to the judge ya prick.

 

by KiD
12-02-03
When I gain access to Heaven, in all its splendor
I will know
That all my rape/necrophilia fantasys shall be fulfilled.

 

by KiD
12-03-03
Notice the unequaled discepline and dedication actor Jean-Pierre Sludgefucker is showing toward actor Jiminy McRibwich in this pannel. Stunning.
My nuts itch.
In this lovely scene, Captian Scrotumhat (played by McRibwich) shows you the intense thought process. This can't be taught in acting school, folks.
Sorry for this whole mess. I truly bring nothing to the table.
Go prepare the paper shredder.
Aye Aye Cap'n.

 

by KiD
12-08-03
What you are about to see is based on a true story being told as it happened (12/8/03 4:10AM):
Fucking Fire Alarm.
Goddamn finals in four hours.

Showing page 1.