All comics by mattaotamato

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by mattaotamato
10-09-06
Nic HATES cleaning his room!
nic clean your friggn' room!
okaaaaay mom!
a weird man arrived in Nic's room
i can help you clean your room!
who the hell are you?
Kathy finds the strange man
nic why isn't your room clean y-- OMG!

 

by mattaotamato
10-09-06
Thomas the owl helps Nic
thomas tell me something to cheer me up.
well my child, first you have to think of a happy place!
Nic tries to find his happy place.
okay...
YAHOO!
Nic is still helpless :(
does this help?
no... cuz i'm all out of ciggs

 

by mattaotamato
10-09-06
Nic Meets Matt for the first time!
Who are you?
I'M MATTTT
They introduce themselves....
cool...
WHATSSSSSS YOUR NAME!
then become the best of friends!
you're weird
OH! HELLO YOUREWEIRDDDD!

 

hey i'm nic.
by mattaotamato, 10-09-06

 

by mattaotamato
10-09-06
Nic has been having a bad day.
ugh. i hate life. i wish i could just die.
so i have heard your death wish
who are you?
i am the grim reeper
are you... really?
yes. we must go now.

 

by mattaotamato
10-09-06
the drim reeper has come to take Nic away!
so... how does this work exactly.
well. i hear a wish and i must grant it. If i dont grant your wish, I'll be fired and then be homeless.
*sigh*
are you ready?
uhm. i can't go. i have a mom and siblings...
YOU MUST GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

by mattaotamato
10-09-06
Nic made a wish to die, and now that the reeper himself is here, he changes his mind.
dude, im sorry.
there's only one way to resolve this
GRANDMA!?!@$#!?!
i had to reveal myself
if i don't take you now, your poor old granny will br homeless!
THATS what youve been doing late saturday nights.

 

by mattaotamato
10-09-06
After finding out that the grim reeper is actually his grandma, Nic is forced to go.
where are we now?
this is hell, sonny.
what's going on? where's the boy?
well... uhm... he was here
the DEAL was that you'd be my grim for eternity if i let you live for eternity! now you have failed me!
.......uhm....... but he was----

 

by mattaotamato
10-09-06
After escaping, Nic leaves his grandma to fin for herself in front of satan!!!
i do not want to here your petty excuses!
WAIT!!!!!
who are you?!?
i'm Nic. hey, have you seen my granny?
I AM SATAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!
okay. what's up satan. have you seen my grandma?

 

by mattaotamato
10-09-06
NIc has come to hell to rescue his grandma, the grim reeper!
do you understand i could ki--
yeah whatever. i need my grandmother.
okay, since you insisted...
Nic and his grandmother made it out of hell alive! END
honey!!! satan turned me into this hideous creature!
that's what you get for selling your soul, dumb bitch.

 

by mattaotamato
10-09-06
in today's news a giant bunny was found in the city. officers have recently detained him but he got away. be on the lookout!
like i said! Be on the lookout. This bunny is very, very DANGEROUS!

 

by mattaotamato
10-09-06
hey Ms. Allen have you seen my mom?
thE litttlE kidSSS havEEE arriveD!!
uhm. she was supposed to be here when i got home from school.
i muSTTTTT cookSSS theMMM for SUPPERRRRRR! HAHAHA!
so i take that as a no, you haven't seen her.
THEY CALL ME CANABALLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MUHAHAHahahaaaaaaaah.... *cough* uh no i haven't seen her.

 

by mattaotamato
10-09-06
wha-- who the hell are you and why are you in my house????
uhm. i was never here!
mom there--
honey why did you go into my room and take my bra?!

 

by mattaotamato
10-10-06
hey, dude, don't go in here. somebody just took the biggest shit of their life.
and it wasn't me...

 

by mattaotamato
10-10-06
ahh. jonathon, how are you doing in algerbra my son?
uh... prinipal Karl, my name's nic and i'm in geometry not--
right! jonathon. haha. you're a fine young man. i'm sure you'll pass that algerbra test!
er... right sir.
haha. jonathon. such a since of humor you have! study up! and remember 1 + 1 is always *hiccup* three!!! haha. have a magnifecent day, jonathon!

 

by mattaotamato
10-11-06
hi, i'm here for the nursing internship.
oh. mmkay. you must be nicolas come right in, sonny d.
sonny d?
usually i don't let kids your age into "the messy room" but i think you can handle it.
oh god...

 

by mattaotamato
10-11-06
first you want somebody to get badly injured. then you go to the scene of the injury, like now. i think you can handle it from here.
so! how did that go, sonny d?!

 

by mattaotamato
10-11-06
now you're get more of the E.R. experience and talk to past patients of the E.R.!
well. halo there son. my name is Juliet S. Moore and I have extreme spastic colon. About a month ago...
A couple of hours later
...And there was blood everywhere! It was disgustin! And my severe alcahol addiction didn't help either! neither did my severe crack sniffing and the loss of my premature baby!

 

by mattaotamato
10-11-06
mmkay. Here's your final task. You get to watch me perform surgery!!! watch and learn.
and when i'm done ma'am, you'll be a brand new woman!
after the surgery...
see sonny d. this how it works!
oh doc. i fweel brwand new! i epswecially love the bowtox.

 

by mattaotamato
10-11-06
have you seen brokeback mountain? it just came out on special edition dvd.
uhmmm. like oh my god. that movie is sooo gay.
what don't you like about it? it's a lovely romance movie.
you are sooo gay.
oh god. jake gyllenhaal is sooo hott.

 

by mattaotamato
10-11-06
Hi Ms. Allen, it's Kathy, Nic's mom. Have you seen nic?
niCC?!!! oooo. ivEEE seeN niCccc!!!!!!
Can you tell me where you saw him?
hEEEEEEE camEEEE to MyyyY hoUsEEE fOOOR suppeRR!! hehehahahohahaHAHA.
Supper? Oh How is he then? Is he being good for you, Ms. Allen?
ooHHH yesssssuMS. HE's VVvEryYY gOOddd. DELICIOUS in FacccTT. MUUUHAHAGHHahaha

 

by mattaotamato
10-12-06
hey gayrie, what do you call a black pilot?
a pigger! pilot and nigger put together! hahahahaha.
no. you call him a pilot you racist ass.

 

by mattaotamato
10-12-06
do you guys serve chicken here?
sit down, sir. we serve everyone here.

 

by mattaotamato
10-12-06
this is a test
testing
this is a-
shut up, dumb bitch

 

by mattaotamato
10-12-06
Hey faggot! Get your lazy ass up and get something done around here. I hate how your room is always fucking perfectly spotless. I hate faggots. They're so gay.
Suck my cock.

 

by mattaotamato
10-13-06
Tell your faggot ass son to get off his lazy ass and do something around here.
You know, Tony, you should spend quality time with him. Maybe he needs attention from his stepfather.
Doing what?
I don't know watch a movie with him.
Lets watch Brokeback Mountain.

 

by mattaotamato
10-13-06
Jake Gyllenhaal is currently recovering from his success in the movie, Brokeback Mountain.
Stupid Jake Gyllenfag. He sucks at acting in any faggot movie of his.
He is now appearing as a manly man in the movie that has just come out on DVD, Jarhead. He plays a rough and tumble army man fighting for our country.
Jake Gyllenheel is the best actor ever. What an amazing movie.

 

by mattaotamato
10-13-06
You stupid faggot. Cocks are for pussies. I hate faggots more than I hate queers. And I hate them a lot!
If you hate faggots so much, why does Mom always catch you on lesbian porn?
Well... Well... I- I--- at least I don't take it up the ass!

 

by mattaotamato
10-13-06
George Bush, I hate faggots! I think it's amazing what you're doing to this country! Killing people and denying people their right to marry whomever they choose daily. I hate faggots. I like pussy.
I like Bush.

 

by mattaotamato
10-14-06
What? Pigs have to use the bathroom too.

 

by mattaotamato
10-15-06
Were you involved in the crime of Ivana Gitmirdired, sir?
Why of course I was. Not. At. All. Involved.
Hello sir! Were you at all involved with the murder of Ivana Gitmirdired?
No...
You are under arrest for the murder of Ivana Gitmirdired.
It's because I'm black, isn't it?

 

by mattaotamato
10-15-06
So, then I tell her that I'm not interested in dating a carnivore. You know, I am on a strict "vegitarian date only" benge. It is a little disturbing to date someone who eats some of your own kind.
What are your thoughts on this?
You're a fucking talking cow.

 

by mattaotamato
10-15-06
That would be weird if I just spontaniously combusted right now.
Yeah, that would be pretty freaky.
Oh, this is great.

 

by mattaotamato
10-15-06
Well, hello Ms. Hollaway. Quality day, isn't it? I was just wondering if young Timothy could come out and play.
What the fuck.

 

by mattaotamato
10-15-06
This is Agent Lenningens Inyou! Come out of your house before we bomb it!
Call me, then I'll talk! 123-4567
Ring. Ring. BEEP. Code: RRR28566. This is Agent Lenningens Inyou. We are about to blow up your house.
Damn machine! I knew it was that salesman's ploy to destroy me! The evilness of these days electronics! The evilness of these day's people!

 

Oh no. Someone just said my comics are horrible! I have no life and my world revolves around stripcreator, so I'm going to slit my wrists now. Thanks biped, or whatever the douche's name is.
by mattaotamato, 10-15-06

 

by mattaotamato
10-16-06
That would be weird if I just spontaniously combusted right now.
Yeah, that would be pretty freaky.
What? Did you expect me to just spontaniously combust?

 

by mattaotamato
10-16-06
Come on, honey! We're going to be late to dinner!
You do not want to see me without my makeup on!
I don't care! We have to go!
FINE!
Are you happy?!

 

by mattaotamato
10-16-06
Pastor, I have been holding in a deep dark secret that has been killing me inside each and every day I live... I was hoping your confidentiality and support could help me in this time of need.
You're gay!?!?!!!
No. I'm a chronic shoplifter.
Oh.

 

by mattaotamato
10-16-06
Well, Dr. Itsokay, I've had problems with identity.
It's okay.
I feel like I don't fit in anywhere.
It's okay.
So... I've been having an affair with your wife.
Fuck you, you worthless freak who'll never fit in anywhere.

 

by mattaotamato
10-16-06

 

by mattaotamato
10-16-06
What if we had boners all the time?
What the fuck did you just say?

 

by mattaotamato
10-16-06
dfgsb dgmgkDDjhghmvbnxgfmdnvvvv vhjDYRJkdt$@$hghvcnb
What the fuck did you just say?

 

by mattaotamato
10-16-06
Oh my god! Is that Jaynana from high school!?
Actually my name is Ranaldo now.
How are you Deb?
Actually, my name is Larry now.

 

by mattaotamato
10-16-06
Sister!
Come meet me tonight so we can escape!
I can't!
Why?
I am designed to be a whore!
You nasty bitch.

 

by mattaotamato
10-16-06
Are you sure this is going to work?
Posotive. These witchcraft spells are as funny as hell.
Okay... Aphrodesiac Moclack Frostly Cum In Tum In Fun In Paul BUNYAN!
aww fuck! You were supposed to say ghostly, not frostly.

 

by mattaotamato
10-17-06
What if somebody found out I was gay? What if someone caught me on gay porn?!
AHHH! Your on gay porn! You must be gay!!! AHHHHHH!
fuck

 

by mattaotamato
10-17-06
I have come to destroy the president of the United States. Do you know where I can find him or her?
Uhm. Yes. Her name is Condalisa Rice. She's black. You can't miss her.
Thanks--
Bush. The name's Bush.

 

by mattaotamato
10-17-06
Don't you hate it when your owner calls you by the wrong name?
Yeah. The other day my owner accidently called me Shamoo.
Shamoo? How do you get Birdy mixed up with Shamoo?
SHAMOO!

 

by mattaotamato
10-17-06
Sorry to bother you, Ms. Wathe, but I cannot sleep at night due to your wild orgasiming.
Sorry that you bothered me, Mr. Asshole, but I cannot have wild sex at night due to your constant watching.
Wow.

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