All comics by Makin_d_bacon

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-19-17
Hey Bro....Stop callin me Beethoven! The name is Chuck...
...ya know? CHUCK? Chuck Chuck bo buck, bonano fano fo fuk...
Aw hell, forget it. Just call me Johnny B. Good and tell Tchaikovsky the news!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-19-17
Listen sweetie, I need ya & yo gal friends to strip to yer undies and dance behind me while I rehearse "School Daze"!
But Mr. Berry, we're barely 14 years old.
Really? If dats the case I'd rather ya'll do it naked!
Maybe we better ask our moms first!
A short time later.....
But I didn't want there flabby old mamas!
Just the facts, Chuck...just the facts!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-20-17
My god...I can't believe this is ALL hate-mail!
I must get SOME positive letters once in a while, right?
This may be one, sir!
At least I can count on the "Imperial Wizard"!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-20-17
The President watches a Press Briefing
For some reason poor Sean Spicer just doesn't get the proper respect....
...from that bunch of media vultures!
Why don't you press-people take me seriously?

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-21-17
Somewhere in North Korea.....
You see Great Leader's new video?
You mean the one where he simulates blowing up a U.S. Aircraft Carrier and a B-52 Bomber?
Simulates?
Yeah...simulates! There's no way he's got the technology or the BALLS to REALLY do anything like that!
What do you mean..."The neighbor kid is a Kim Jong-Un spy!"? She's a 5 year old, Chuk!
But she punches like a grown woman!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-21-17
"Oh....who lives in a pine-apple under the sea?"
WTF? Now THIS is one cockeyed optimist!
"Absorbent and yellow and porous, is he!"
Please, let him be! He's harmless!
Gang way, softy! My dinner is served!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-21-17
Hey ragu4u, are you gonna see then new "Old Yeller" remake?
What you talkin bout, Willis?
They totally re-did that film from the sixties. It opens in an hour at the Bijou!
Just tell me this......does the dog LIVE this time?
Dog? What dog?
I knew he was just screwin with me!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-21-17
At home with ragu4u......
Welcome to the new AT&T United Messaging System!
Cool beans! Do I have any new messages?
Fuck you fatso. Maybe it's a secret. Who wants to know anyway?
Oh my! Hey this service isn't costing me MORE, is it?
I'd tell ya but then I'd have to kill ya!
I knew this would happen the minute the Lithuanians bought AT&T!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-22-17
Barris NOT Berry...
Hey...if it ain't Gene, Gene the dancing machine!
Chuck? Is zat you?
You bet. In all my radiant glory!
So...hit it, already!
Da da, duh duh duh! Da da duh duh duh! Da da duh duh duh! Dah da duh duh duh!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-23-17
Hey d_bacon...wanna do lunch?
Excellent idea, rags! I can hardly wait!
Calm down fella. It's not like we've NEVER done lunch before. Let me make the call!
At the home of "atomiclunch"....
Trust us! See ya soon!
I don't know about those kinky bastards. I sure hope "do Lunch" doesn't mean what it sounds like it means!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-24-17
The Dynamic Uno's prank backfires...
Hey d_bacon, I'm afraid Lunch is wise to our gambit!
How was us supposed to know he has a "talking ass-hole" security system?
This calls for a change in the game plan!
We need to distract him. Go get the sexiest gal you know & bring her to us!
ragu4u said you guys wanted to see me.
Hey rags...no wonder people think that we're a faggot, dude!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-25-17
3:50 pm...
Ok my little pretty, you're gonna die in 2 hours!
Oh please spare me, viscious chinaman!
4:50 pm....
One hour to go! Getting scared yet? I love the scent of fresh tinkle in the morning!
Please free me you oriental ogre, or I'll be forced to take steps.
5:50 pm...
Hey...it's not like I didn't warn ya!
This is SO embarrassing!

 

Today's excuse.......
"_____________"
"_______________"
by Makin_d_bacon, 3-25-17

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-25-17
Me ruv you rong time!
Now is the RIGHT time!
No, no. You no get it. Me ruv YOU RONG time.
Wadya mean wrong time? Right NOW is the RIGHT time. Now gimme dat nookie!
You no get flesh with ME!
For Christ's sake gook, make up your mind.

 

Yup...12...count em!
RCGL is gonna be pissed!
by Makin_d_bacon, 3-25-17

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-25-17
...behind the scenes...
Oh, who lives in a pine-apple under the sea....
Sponge Bob Square Pants.
Absorbent and yellow and pourous, is he...
Sponge Bob Square Pants.
Uh....I forgot the rest!
You know the drill, Perv... No jingle, no nookie!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-25-17
So your complaint is..."This guy ravaged you, sodomized you in every cavity..."
...fondled you repeatedly and then came in your mouth." Correct?
Actually, no!
Well then what IS your complaint?
My complaint is.....that he DIDN'T!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-26-17
At Home with ragu4u & makin_d_bacon
"...noticing a theme here."
Oh shit! RAGS...get in here, pronto!
What's the huge crisis NOW, d_bacon?
You gotta lighten up on the "gay" comics. Sensitive people are beginning to talk.
And by "sensitive people" you're meaning...?
You know I can't say because I've taken the Sicilian vow of silence. "Omerta", big boy..."Omerta"!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-27-17
Am I in trouble?
You wet the bed again Timmy. What do you think?
So are YOU gonna punish me or is Dad?
I believe it will be your father as he always says the punishment must fit the crime.
Therefore......
So, you like wetting the bed, do you boy?
Why can't he just spank me?

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-27-17
Before the battle....
Here come the Ninjas....
...of good & evil for battle!
Fuck you, ass-hole! I'm gonna chop off your head & shit down your neck!
That may be the outcome but I will fight with honor to bring glory to our Lord!
After the battle.....
They musta switched outfits!
Yeah, switched outfits. That's the ticket!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-27-17
When I say "NOW"...flip the switch! Raise your hand if you have any questions?
This is extremely high voltage! Are you absolutely sure now?
SHIT! You just couldn't wait, could ya?
Did I flip it too soon?

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-28-17
Need help sir?
Yes. I'm looking for a book on how to make "Top Rated" comics.
Like the ones on "Stripcreator.com"?
Exactly! For some odd reason mine never seem to obtain that glory!
I'll try to help but I'm afraid it may be hopeless for you, Mr. ragu4u...or is it makin_d_bacon, today?
WTF...I never told her my name? What mishegas is this?

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-28-17
Father, my wedding is tonight and I'm...uh...unprepared!
Never fear my son, we have an age old tradition to prepare you.
You mean...the Jezebel?
Yes my son, follow me!
OK Jezebel, where do I start?
Baa?

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-28-17
Just fill this out. I'll then be better able to make my diagnosis.
Sure thing, Doc. I gotta know what's causing this.
15 minutes later
It says here that, aside from your obviously odd genetic make-up, you have eaten 20 pounds of "Bugles Snacks" daily for the past 10 years!
So? What's THAT got to do with my issue?
Well, I just assumed the issue was your body struct....
What are you...some kinda quack? My issue is..."Why am I so damned handsome?"

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-29-17
Heard on Conservative Talk Radio....
I'm talking today with Maxine Waters about the comment made about her from Bill O'rielly!
Yeah...that no good cracker said my hair looked like a James Brown wig!
That he did! But it appears you've made a change. It seems you're now going for a differnt look!
You like it?
You look like the Linc Hayes character from "Mod Squad"!
You better lawyer up, "White Bread"! Maxine is PISSED!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-29-17
Alright, Hombe....DRAW!
DRAW I say, you devil because if'n ya don't it'd be a huge mistake!
Don't worry, I've got THAT eventuality covered too!
Damned Artists!! Brokeback Mountain ain't never been the same since that fag flick came out.

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-30-17
You wanna WHAT?
I want to join a gym!
But why?
So when I grow up my ass doesn't look like what you said mom's looks like. You know...a sack full of nickles!
A sack of WHAT?
Oh shit...here it comes!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-30-17
What is this thing, anyway?
I haven't named it yet. Just get in and we'll test it.
ouch..ouch...OUCH!!!
Ok, ok...c'mon out, cry baby!
WTF, doc?
Hmmm...it appears I've created the "Microwave"!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-31-17
ragu4u gets verklempt longing to see his "OLD" comics once again...
Regrets, I've had a few...but then again...too few to mention!
I did what I had to do. I saw it through, without exemption!
...but Brad would NOT relent!
Will you please stop that god awful whining! I said they're gone, kaput, DELETED!
Oh, the IN-humanity!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
3-31-17
I've got it Rags baby. We'll have a "write-in" campaign!
That's IT, d_bacon! Everyone who wants my old comics back can make their own comics telling Brad to release them!
There! I've just posted the idea on Stripcreator.com! Now we'll sit back and wait for the mass of responses!
*cricket, cricket, cricket, cricket*

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-01-17
Easter is only a few weeks away so you had better try on your costume!
Certainly dear. Dressing up as Jesus for Easter is the high-point of Spring for me!
Oh, I meant to tell you...I bought you a NEW costume.
Then in that case I'll try it on now, as alterations may be needed.
*urgh* but why?
You deserved it, Martha! Jesus wouldn't ever have dressed like THIS! It's a friggen sacrilege!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-01-17
Hmmm. I wonder if this stuff is pornographic?
Dad, I watched a CD on the computer in your bedroom of you & ma having sex. Is THAT porn?
Heavens to Betsy, no way Timmy, can anyone call THAT porn!
Well, what about the one with you & the three Asian nymphos?
AHHHH! Now THAT'S porn my boy! That's PORN!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-01-17
Aren't you afraid of being locked up with me, a psychotic pedophile?
No way! Should I?
You're darned right you should. I recall the last kid I got hold of....
Wait just a damned minute. I'm no KID. I'm a 45 year old midget!
Yo jailer, get this creepy fucker outta here!
Hey...nice ass!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-02-17
#1
#2
#3
#4
So which one did you select to play the new "Pennywise" in the remake of "IT"?
Definitely #3! He's the scariest clown of all time!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-02-17
At work with ragu4u.......
Burning the midnight oil, eh ragsy baby?
You know what they say, "Midnight here is noon in Bejing"!
It's good you're so interested in our Asian customers!
You betcha, boss man. Nose to the grindstone...that's ME all over!
By the way...since when did we acquire a client named "Tokyo Lesbos in Heat"
Damned browser histoy!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-03-17
You know the tune....
3rd boxcar midnight train, destination Bangor Maine. Old worn out clothes & shoes, I don't pay no union dues...
...I smoke old stogies I have found, short but not too big around, I'm a man of means by no means...
Ahem!
*uhhhhhh*...HEN of the road!?

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-03-17
So, Judas what's up for today?
You have a meeting with the head of the Carpenters Union.
No problemo dude. Where's that over-paid lazy goon wanna meet?
On Golgatha!
It was the "over paid" part, right?

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-04-17
The grandkids should be here any minute.
Why don't they come more often, Rube?
Beats me but....
...I'm guessing it may have something to do with YOU smellin like urine and ME stinkin of shit!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-05-17
I sure hate delivering mail to this fag!
Hello there, sweet cheeks. How'd ya know I was aching for some MALE?
Oh, I've got what you're aching for alright...
Get back here you fudge-packing, scum bag!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-06-17
The "Groceraunt".....
Welcome to "Whole Foods" your NEW "Groceraunt"!
"Groceraunt"? Ya'll mean I kin eat shit here while I shop?
Absolutely, sir! Sip wine as you peruse our many aisles and then sit down for a nice seafood meal at the Oyster Bar before leaving!
Sheeee-it! Fuck DAT! I ain't sharing my "Ripple" wit no goll darned, half drunk oysters
I knew opening a franchise in Redneck, Mississippi was a bad idea!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-06-17
At home with ragu4u & makin_d_bacon
What say we rent a film tonight?
Wonderful idea, d_bacon. At least that way we can select something that isn't trashy nonsense.
What should we see? Citizen Kane? How about something from Terrence Malik? He's deep and artsy fartsy!
Take a break, I'll go. I know a few perfect fims.
Later, after the films...
So? What did ya think? Awesome, right? Let's watch em again!
I'll take a pass. I guess the "Jack-Ass" trilogy is just too cerebral for me!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-06-17
Are you saying you WILL have sex with me me, Kim?
Absolutely, as soon as pigs fly! Hey...what are you looking at?
So...was being able to fly your only wish?
*oink*
Let's just call it "answered prayer"!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-06-17
dip, dip, dip, dip, dip, dip, dip, dip, boom boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom,..GET A JOB!
So, Mr. d_bacon, I don't think I'll need your services.
C'mon...every newspaper has an Op-Ed section. That's my speciality!
I hardly think so.
But why?
For one thing, our readers might frown on a pig doing op-ed but then there's that god awful name you want to use...
What part of "Pork O. Pine" bothers you?

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-07-17
That's right, boy! Shoot 59 of those buggers straight into that Syrian Air Base...PRONTO!
Sir, yes SIR!
Ok, here goes #59....
Mission accomplished, SIR!
You mean you took me seriously?

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-08-17
George, we've been married for years. So why haven't you explained that word "SWAN" tattooed on yer penis?
SWAN? Oh that was just a whim! I'm gonna take a shower now!
KIM? Were you watching me in the shower?
I'm sorry daddy. I guess I need a real good spanking, right?
You what? You watched your father in the shower? I guess you saw the "SWAN" tattoo on his dick, didn't you?
SWAN? No way. I just saw the one that said, SASKATCHEWAN!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-08-17
Glad to see you're finally off welfare and working, young man!
You'd think my double P.H.D. in Quantum Physics would have landed me a better gig.
But those P.H.D.'s were from a public University. They're worthless!!
So only degrees from Parochial Schools count for anything?
Welcome to the Vatican, Mr. President! The Pope will receive you momntarily!
Time is money Padre. All I want is my weekly "envelope" to keep pushing the old "Catholic" school agenda.

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-08-17
Let us be the first...
...to wish everyone on this site....
...a most eventful...
..."PENETRATING" & belated...
Push, Push, in the Bush!
..."NATIONAL BEAVER DAY"!
..."NATIONAL BEAVER DAY"!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-08-17
You think those two are...uh...gay?
One way to find out!
...in the kitchen of ragu/d_bacon
Hey...quit staring at my ass!
It looks sorta good from here.....in a lean "pork butt" kinda way, of course!
Well?
Nah! I 'm hoping the goof with the tie is a "wanna-be" chef!

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-09-17
Oooh my rectum is so sore!
How horrible...that poor woman was ass raped by lumberjacks!
It coulda been worse. It coulda been PIRATES!
Oh no!
Aiyeeeeeee!
I take it anal sex isn't her favorite?

 

by Makin_d_bacon
4-09-17
How Armless Anders got his name......
Say Anders, I need ya to give me a hand. Hop in the machine.
Why am I in here?
Let's say you're making a donation.
So... how do you like them?
They're OK, but the right one keeps falling off.

Showing page 12.

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