All comics by brycekain

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by brycekain
11-09-14
ARRRR! And this is where they keep the blood?
*chuckles* No, sir. This is a tampon recycle center. We never re-use anything with any amount of blood or dna on it. We throw that stuff out in the biohazard tank in the back.
But the only tank behind this building is for thrown out abortions and fat from Beverly Hills liposuction clinics.
It's the economy, sir. We have to share medical waste drop-off containers. I swear, if Obama wasn't in office....
I'm not sure whether I should be hungry or become a Repulbican.
Why not be both? Can't be any worse than being Larry Craig.

 

by brycekain
11-09-14
Try the new Penis Bed!
Now available in midget size!

 

by brycekain
11-09-14
Says here I should say something that means something close to my heart, and then lean in to kiss her.
Goodnight, Kimberly. I had a real good time last night.
Don't you mean you had a real good time tonight?
No, last night I performed cunnilingus on your grandmother's vajayjay. Tonight will depend on if you're into skull fucking after anal.
But *OUR* grandmother has been dead for 27 years.

 

by brycekain
11-09-14
Groovy?
Groovy.
♫♫ IF YOU WANT MY BODY! AND YOU THINK I'M SEXY! COME ON, BABY, LET ME KNOW! ♫♫
Stop tampering with evidence, Sargeant Bunnfuck.

 

by brycekain
11-09-14
So Brad decides to date Maurua.
What the hell happened to the lights? And even more, what the fuck happened to everything on Stripcreator.com??
Brown out.

 

by brycekain
11-09-14
YOU built this??
Yes I did, my son. It was a love affair
psst.... do you remember the rest of the words?
NO! I thought YOU DID!
There was only one thing that they could do...
WAH WAH WAH... WAH WAH WAH... WAH WAH WAH... WAH WAH WAH... WAH WAH WAH... WAH WAH WAH... WAH WAH WAH...
WAH WAH WAH... WAH WAH WAH... WAH WAH WAH... WAH WAH WAH... WAH WAH WAH... WAH WAH WAH... WAH WAH WAH...

 

by brycekain
11-09-14
No wait! Jim Morrison, not Morrisey! Fuck.
Oh, the HELL! Bitch, I KNOW you didn't just take out northern Africa on a TECHNICALITY! Ok, gawd dammit! Fuck this bullshit!!! I WILL DESTROY YOU!!!!!
Honey, what the hell are you doing in there??
Playing Triviador. Don't judge me, woman!

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
I fucking don't care!
What?
I fucking don't care!
What?
Poop.
OH! Well why didn't you just say Bill Cosby was accused of rape?

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
I'm gunna buttfuck you.
Why?
Cause.
Cause why?
Roadhouse!

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
I'm sorry, but he didn't make it.
Wait a minute! That's JAM on yoru shirt! Did you even perform the surgery??
You misspelled "your."

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
♫♫ I see death 'round every corner! ♫♫
♫♫ I see death 'round every corner! ♫♫
♫♫ And for some reason this hillside has herpes... ♫♫
Hey, motherfucker! It's called SHINGLES!

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
And just what the hell do YOU want?
Morning, sir. Sanchez Gaylord from Fox News. I was wondering if you could comment on the allegations.
I'M NOT BILL COSBY!!!
Allegations that you are the most beautiful post-mullet superstar evar!
Roadhouse?

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
I'm sorry. Is this the God's Butthole joke or the TOBOR's Butthole joke?
You just don't get it, do you?
What?
I slaved over a hot stove for you every night for the past 10 weeks! And this is the thanks I get!?
Smoke some more pot.
Oh, right right...

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
I'm going on strike! All the roadhouse jokes, all the god's butthole jokes, all the lot of it! There's nothing original on Planet WTF anymore!
Dude, smoke some more pot.
Oh yeah, huh?
Welcome back to value-less mediocrity. :)

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
And for my next joke, I'd like a volunteer.
You, sir. Help me out here. Why did the chicken cross the road?
FUCK YOU! I HATE YOU! I HOPE YOU DIE!
Abilify. Making train wrecks even more psycho since 2004!

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
Half a car.
Why?
Saves gas.
How?
Love?
Makes sense.

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
Splitherines. Focosta. Rombu-megadose!
What my friend here is trying to say is...
ARBOFARGTGUS! IJLIGIES POCREZSTPORU AGUS!
Again, what my friend here is trying to say is...
GAMDUMB PERFOR DUISANY BOD YSTILLRE ADINGTHISSHIT?
What he said.

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
CONGRATU-WATIONS!
FIE HUNRED GAW BUH-HOLE JOCK!
Is it really?
FOK EEF EYE NO!

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
If you refuse to say your lines, then I'll just tell our readers that Madonna slimed your puckerholes, too.
REALLY??
Dude, gross.

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
Hey! At least I'm not Bill Cosby!

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
♫♫ do you hear what I hear...? ♫♫
No.
♫♫ DO YOU HEAR WHAT I HEAR...? ♫♫
No.
i farted.

 

by brycekain
11-11-14
It appears that the only loser tonight is Barrack Obama.
In bed.

 

by brycekain
11-13-14
If you comment on this comic, I will change the ending to fit what you say.
Any time anyone comments from here on out, the ending will be changed for every comment. Like this one...
Let us begin: Pine Sol enemas are better. Ragu likes GILFs. Pandiest reminds me of my lovely ball rash.
Also hovercraft eels is slang for penis farts. And BryceKain is also PlanetWTF and AtheistDiary. And don't talk to me about pantywaste unless you're ready to feltch a midget with eDog. Snoogans.

 

by brycekain
11-15-14
Sir, people are accusing you of being another SC member called Pandy-cyst or something.
So?
But you're not Panda-yeast. You're BryceKain, AtheistDiary, and PlanetWTF. What would lead them to believe you are this Panda-rama-poo person?
Seems like they are somewhat copying the Planet WTF style on some of their comics.
Well, you know what they say about imitation and being the highest form of...
Plagurism? Unoriginality? Boredom and lack of creativity? I'm fully experienced in all these things. (see also: ROADHOUSE!)

 

by brycekain
11-15-14
Panda Treeist! I have 5 dolla fo' you!
I'm not a panda! My name is Pandeist! You know, like a theist, only I swing both ways.
I'm sorry, Mr. Pan Handler, but you must remove yourself from the premises. I don't care how famous your sister is.
Pan handler? WTF?? And why do I look like a muppet with down syndrome?? Is this the only "bear" character on Strip Creator??
I didn't look very hard.
I have some place you can play the skin... er... I mean PAN flute...
...the fuck is wrong with this Rice Gravy guy anyway?

 

by brycekain
11-17-14
Brett Cocksnot, MSNBC: Are you, or have you ever been...?
I am not Pandeist.
Giraldo Rivera, Fox News: Are you...?
I am NOT Pandeist.
Slade Stone, private investigator: I have a few questions. First, is that...?
It's PANTY-WASTE!

 

by brycekain
11-17-14
HA!!!!
IIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!! IIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!! IIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!! IIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!! IIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!! IIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!! IIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!! IIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!! IIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!!
What in good gracious was that?
I don't know, dear, but your B-hole looks like a sexy haggis.

 

by brycekain
11-17-14
Did you see the Walking Dead last night??
No.
Duuuuude, it's was crazy! You should have seen the...
What does this have to do with the MILF horde outside?
Nothing.
Dude. Dumping Spanish Fly in everyone's glass at a restaurant full of jap-hags isn't NOTHING!

 

by brycekain
11-18-14
Do you mind, COW?? I'm trying to take a piss here!
Maybe.
Do you mind that I'm with the Cow Clux Clan?

 

by brycekain
11-18-14
Say it.
"You got a BONE to pick with me??"
hahahahaha
It's funny cause you're about to commit infanticide.

 

by brycekain
11-19-14
I'm sick of these motherfuckin' shark-farts on this motherfuckin' plane!

 

by brycekain
11-19-14
Did you know that the third rule of time travel is to not talk about time travel?
Actually the third rule is to not make your first and last panel appear to be identical.
Did you know that the third rule of time travel is to not talk about time travel?

 

by brycekain
11-19-14
That's not a door. Gary took a massive shit in the other room.
When did I eat corn?

 

by brycekain
11-19-14
Party foul! You are inserting too many penalty cards into referee bums!
And just how can you prove that one, sir?
I'm holding a yellow card.

 

by brycekain
11-20-14
HA! Stole your car!

 

by brycekain
11-20-14
There's now way it's that big. It's probably just your posture.
That's not it.
What is it then?
I'm just... I don't know. I think I'm marveling at it.
It's an optical illusion, Gabe!
But... my penis... it looks like my left arm!

 

by brycekain
11-20-14
Behold! It is I! Ranger Rick! And his trusty side kick Inappropriate Horse!
MY WIFE HAS HAD TWENTY THREE ABORTIONS!
Well, someone is certainly living up to their name...
MY CLITORUS LIKES PENATRATING YOUR UNCLE'S BROWN EYE!

 

by brycekain
11-20-14
I CAN DO THIS...
I CAN DO THIS...
*thump bump*
AAAAAAHHHHHH
HHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

 

by brycekain
11-20-14
Is dinner almost done?
In a minute, dear!
Well hurry up cause I'm starving!
Hold your horses, woman!
That was ONE TIME in college! I needed the money!
I seriously need to break up with Megyn Kelly.

 

by brycekain
11-20-14
Ninja, please.

 

by brycekain
11-20-14
DUDE!!!!!!!!!!
WHAT??
Brad's following me!
You DO know that Brad Sucks, right?
I KNOW!!!!!! :)

 

by brycekain
11-20-14
♫♫ TOBOR DREAMING ♫♫
♫♫ OF A WONG ♫♫
♫♫ FIST-MAS ♫♫
I hate the IRS.

 

by brycekain
11-20-14
Did you hear they gave Casey Anthony her own reality show?
It's called 19 Graves and Counting.
Uh, you do know that you're trying out to be a clown at a Bat Mitzvah, right?
So more Hitler jokes then?

 

by brycekain
11-20-14
Dude, I know you're like all emo and stuff...
...and I know that you didn't want to come to your grandmother's funeral...
HEY! You said you liked anal!
But did you have to shit all over the grass?

 

by brycekain
11-20-14
Well it certainly is... um... a creative sculpture...
You like it? I call it "White Power Donkey Stuck in Volkswagen Falling Out of Hitler's B-Hole for Satan."
Sir, this is a holocaust museum.
So... more dick jokes then?

 

by brycekain
11-20-14
Where are we?
Hitler's B-Hole.
We're continuing this joke...?
Yup.
Ever think about offing yourself so you don't have to work here anymore?
Every day.

 

by brycekain
11-20-14
Will you hire me?
Yes.
Can I play with your keys?
Yes.
Will you buy me some catnip?
*SIGH* The things I do for pussy...

 

by brycekain
11-21-14
NAILED IT!

 

by brycekain
11-21-14
Giraldo Rivera for Fox News! Though you keep denying allegations that you are Pandeist, the rumors still exist. Is there anything you want to say to the public?
*SIGH* YES! I'm Pandeist! I tried starting drama so my comics would stay relevant. I failed. Please... respect my family's privacy in our hour of crisis.
But, sir. You're NOT Pandeist. Why did you lie to him like that?
It's simple. You feed them the answer they want to hear and usually they go away.
I wonder if he could fulfill my panty waste fantasy?

 

by brycekain
11-21-14
Boy, I hope these owls don't shit on our heads.
Let me switch to my trusty semen catcher in case these magnificent beasts get frisky, too!
I think I've identified the female of the species.

Showing page 13.

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