All comics by edoggydog

 

by edoggydog
5-18-06
It's not the heat I can't stand. It's the fucking HUMIDITY!
Groovy!
Meanwhile...
Later, Bush admitted that we will all need to learn Spanish if the latest immigration bill goes into law. Cunt?
Thanks, Cock. This just in: mattmallone is a cum-sucking, cock-blowing, ball-licking, ass-felching, Democrat-voting butt-wipe!
...and, that's why I let my girlfriend pee in my mouth.
Ewww!

 

by edoggydog
5-18-06
In a land, far, far away...
What do you think of my new wallpaper?
Groovy!
Meanwhile, it's Kareoke Night down at Mulrooney's...
♫ Don't wish your girlfriend was [hic] drunk like me?♫ *BRAAAAAPPP*
Meanwhile, back at make-a-comic central...
Five dollah, SUCKY-SUCKY!
My sister, she so PLUCKY!!

 

by edoggydog
5-19-06
You put the lime in the coconut and drink it all up! Then, take a MAJOR dump, and call your general practitioner...
Groovy!
Later that day...
Forget what that Mr. Chuhufukuhula said. Smoke some crack and jerk off all over the kittens!
Groovy!
Then, it got really lame...
Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy!
Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy! Groovy!

 

by edoggydog
5-19-06
...then, Mr. Manson threw up all over me, and I swore I would never bathe again! But, then my mom turned the hose on me and that was that... BITCH!
Groovy!
Hey... Did you hear that several guards were attacked at Gitmo as they were trying to stop one of the terrorist inmates from committing suicide?
Why?
Why were the guards attacked?
No. Why were they trying to stop a terrorist inmate from committing suicide?

 

by edoggydog
5-20-06
[Based on an actual news report]
Dude... I've just been contracted to make a public service announce-ment, to be aired in Iraq, encouraging sucide bombers to, you know, NOT be sucide bombers!
Groovy!
Karbala, six months later...
...so, in closing Mr. Terrorist, we plead with you to do the right thing. Think of the innocent women and children you may kill. Can't we all just get along?
*sniff*
Bagdad, the next day...

 

by edoggydog
5-21-06
...and then he unzipped and pee'd all over the reporters. In other news, controversy rocked CC: 322 yesterday.
"A stripper named Crabby criticized fellow stripper edoggydog, claiming his comics are not funny..."
Groovy!
(Meanwhile, at Groovy! Productions...)
edoggydog could not be reached for comment.
*sniff*

 

by edoggydog
5-26-06
Viva la raza!
Donde esta la oficina del welfare?
Badges? No necesitamos chingale badges!
GOOOOOAAAAALLL!!
Groovio!
GAH!!

 

by edoggydog
5-29-06
Holly came from Miami FLA. Hitch-hiked her way across the USA. Plucked her eyebrows on the way, Shaved her leg and then he was a she and she said, "Hey, babe... Take a walk on the wild side!"
So, I took a walk on the "wild side"!
What? No GROOVY?

 

by edoggydog
6-02-06
We injuns are able to tell what's near by putting our ears to the ground. Here, I'll show you...
Groovy!
Buffalo come!
That's AMAZING! How do you know?
Sticky ear!
Ewwwwwww!

 

by edoggydog
6-02-06
I want you to search deep in your heart...
Groovy!
Isn't there something you want to ask Jesus?
Yes.
Is that AccentuateNegative guy really GAY?
Oh, I'm sure he has his down moments, too...

 

by edoggydog
6-03-06
I find man who want fucky-fucky, which we charge one hundred dollah. But, he only have fifty dollah. So, I'll just give him blowjob!
Groovy!
(Scene censored so I won't lose my Stripcreator Donor status)
Fifty dollars for a blowjob? Okay... [unzip] *SCHLONG*
WOW! You are HUUUUUGE! Please, wait here... I be back!
Can we lend him the other fifty dollah?
?!?

 

by edoggydog
6-04-06
I saw that ad on TV for e-Harmony... Y'know, the one where they choose a soulmate based on a personality test? So, I joined, hoping to meet the "one"...
Groovy!
When they send you matches, you have to go through a five-step process before you can see what the person looks like. That's so you can fall in love with them on the inside first, but...
Goddamn! Another long, boring story How do I let this guy corner me? I swear! This tool could really talk a man's skin off!
..that's like going to the market to buy a can of your favorite beans, but the can's dented. Now, you love what's inside, but if the exterior's fucked up, you reject it, right? After that, I gave...
SEE??

 

by edoggydog
6-05-06
So, I was at Long Beach State today, earning a little extra cash by participating in a scientific study...
Groovy!
They wanted to see if I black man and a gorilla could produce offspring by mating. They want me to go back and have more sex with the ape, but I hope they'll remove her muzzle next time...
Really? Why?
'Cuz I want to KISS that monkey!
Then, you better bring her a box of chocolates!

 

by edoggydog
6-13-06
"So, there I was at WacDonald's over on 3rd, trying to order a WacSloppy Meal Deal with a large Diet Fanta..."
May I [*snicker*] take you're [*snicker, snicker*] order? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA [*snort*]
What's so funny?
"I guess I wasn't in the mood for taking anyone's SHIT!"
*gasp*
CAN I GET SOMEONE ELSE COME TAKE MY FUCKING ORDER??
The best part was the manager comped my meal!
Groovy!

 

by edoggydog
6-14-06
"I was moonlighting at the local Crack in the Crotch, when in walked a midget..."
May I take you're order, sir?
I'm not here to eat...
***KISS***
HEY!!
He then went on to kiss everyone else in the "joint"!
Groovy!

 

by edoggydog
6-19-06
WELCOME TO MacRAPEY'S!
Groovy!
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE?
I'd like a MacMattMallone combo with a Coke Zero...
Would you like to SUPER FAG that?
Is it possible for the MacMattMallone to get even more GAY?

 

by edoggydog
6-22-06
FUCK YOU AND THE HORSE YOU RODE IN ON!!
Groovy!
(Later that evening...)
UNNNGGH! UNNGGHH! OOOOOOOOOOO!! YEAH, BABY!!
BETTER STAND BACK 'CUZ I'M GONNA SPOOOOOOOOGE!!!
(The next morning...)
Dude... Tell me you got her number!
Number..? SHIT!! Oh, well... You up for waffles?

 

by edoggydog
6-22-06
FUCK YOU AND THE HORSE YOU RODE IN ON!!
Groovy!
(Later that evening...)
OUCH! WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUUK!!
UNNGGH! UNNNGGHH!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!
(Two hours later...)
Promise me you won't tell ANYONE what just happened!
Dude... My lips are sealed! So is my ass...LITERALLY!!

 

by edoggydog
7-03-06
"I've been mulling over you're idea for a new children's instructional comic book, Oh, My Achin's Balls!..."
Groovy!
"And, the idea of a guy name Gabe getting nailed in the nuts all the time is just (ha, ha)... Just (ha, ha, ha)... I mean...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA..."
I'm glad you like it!
"Like it? It's got to be the LAMEST idea for a comic book I've ever heard! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA..."
Oh.

 

by edoggydog
7-04-06
"Well, against my better judgement, why don't you show me a sample of your new children's instructional comic book..."
Groovy!
Lesson #46: Little Girls and Bathroom Etiqette
You left the fucking toilet seat up again, ASSHOLE!! Hiiiiiiiiiiii-YA!!
Yeeeeee-OUCH! Oh, my achin' BALLS!!
"I... I... I don't really know what to (ahem) say..."
Don't say anything! Let's just enjoy this moment silently...

 

by edoggydog
7-05-06
"After seeing a sample of you new children's instructional comic book, Oh, My Achin' Balls!, I've made a decision about your future here..."
Groovy!
[Fifteen minutes later...]
Well..?
"You still here?"
Oh, shit.

 

by edoggydog
7-17-06
I'm going to jump in this time machine and go back in time to kill that asshole Crabby! I'll be back in one hour...
Groo-fucking-VEE!!
[Panel inserted to denote the passage of time]
What do you mean he's not dead?
Have you ever tried to kill a cockroach?

 

by edoggydog
7-20-06
Hey, dad!
Hey, son! Ummm... Shouldn't you be at school, son?
Well, dad... It's really hot outside. I know that because I'm sweating, and I've got a major sunburn, dad!
That must mean it's summer. And, there's no school. Hence, the reason you're home, son!
Right, dad... Gee, I want to grow up and be just like you, dad!
You're obviously well on your way, son!

 

by edoggydog
7-20-06
I came to America to open a Greek cafe...
Groovy!
Even though I came here, I really didn't want to...
Why?
Because, I was leaving my brother's behind...
You look more Mexican than Geek, by the by...

 

by edoggydog
7-20-06
Going somewhere, son?
Right, dad! How can you tell?
Because you're standing by the front door, it's open, and you're holding your car keys, son!
You're a fucking GENIUS, dad!
Obviously, it sounds like you're being a little SARCASTIC, son!
Right again, Dad!

 

by edoggydog
7-20-06
Looks like we picked the WRONG time to visit Lebanon, son!
No shit, dad!

 

by edoggydog
7-20-06
(This comic is based on an actual conversation I once had with my brother-in-law, a.k.a the original "Captain Obvious"...)
Hey, son! I'm right in the middle of watching "The Blair Witch Project"...
I can see that, dad!
Oh... Have you seen "The Blair Witch Project", son?
Yes, dad! That's how I know what movie it is, dad!
Is it GOOD, son?
Haven't you been WATCHING it, dumbass- er, dad?

 

by edoggydog
8-01-06
...so, I then says, "I knew Artoo Deetoo. Artoo Deetoo was a friend of mine. And, you, sir are no 'Artoo Deetoo'!"
By the way... Have you read those "FPD" comics by HCRoyall?
Yeah... Aparently, "FPD" stands for "Fucking Pretty Dumb"!
Well, that was certainly uncalled for...
Oooh, if I hurry, I can make it home just in time for the start of the "Sex and the City"!

 

by edoggydog
8-07-06
...so, I says, "Ping pong halls? I thought you said, 'King Kong's balls'!" That's when I realized I made an ASS outta myself! HAHAHAHAHAHA [*snort*]
What do you think of this funny pink donkey?
Groovy!
I think he SUCKS!
May I take your order, sir? Sir..? SIR..? MOTHERFUCKER!!

 

by edoggydog
8-10-06
...and that's why I only use FPD* after traveling cross-country on a stinky, dirty Greyhound bus while not wearing any underwear!
Groovy!
Anyhoo... I just got out of prison after being locked up for fifteen years...
What were you in for?
I hacked up my husband into one hundred and fifty-two little pieces!
Oh, so you're SINGLE... Cool!

 

by edoggydog
8-10-06
...and that's why I hacked up my husband into one hundred and fifty-three little pieces!
Groovy!
So, after spending fifteen years in prison, and traveling cross-country in a dirty, stinky Greyhound bus with no underwear on, I'm really horny! Do you wanna have sex with me in the women's lounge?
Sure. Wait here while I go get something out of my car...
What? A condom?
No. A can of FPD*...

 

by edoggydog
8-15-06
Dude... A famous author and screen-writer is going to look in on our comics and give us an honest critique...
Groovy!
By the way... He happens to be Jewish. So, watch the ethnic slurs...
Well... Just as long as he's not GAY!
Uh...
Oh, great! An author/screenwriter who's Jewish AND gay! What are the odds of that?? Later...

 

by edoggydog
8-17-06
Meow?
Meow?
Meow?
Meow?
Holy SHIT! [*hic*] They're killer PUSHIES!! BRAAAAAAAAAP!!
Groovy!

 

by edoggydog
8-17-06
Hingus!
Evret!
Everclear!
The Blackthornies
Me so horny!
Groovy!

 

by edoggydog
8-17-06
OKAY! I'LL LET YOU TAKE ME HOME AND FUCK MY BRAINS OUT AND BLAH, BLAH, BLAH...
GROOVY! BLAH, BLAH, BLAH...
[Sex scene acted out by the "Make a Comic" default Asian girls...]
OH! GIVE IT TOO ME, BABY! HARDER! DEEPER! HARDER! DEEPER! I WANT YOU TO SPOOGE ALL OVER MY PUSSY BLAH, BLAH, BLAH!!
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH! [SPOOOOOOOGE!!]
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU SHOT YOUR WAD IN MY CAT'S FACE!!
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH! LATE...

 

by edoggydog
8-18-06
Duuuuuuuuuuuude! I just talked to that famous author/ screenwriter, who also happens to be a gay Jew, and he said he really likes our comics!
Groovy!
His only complaint was that you tend to say "groovy!" way too much...
Groovy!
No, seriously... WAY too much!
Groovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovygroovy..!

 

by edoggydog
9-13-06
Groovy!
It was a pre-emptive "groovy"...
Oh.

 

by edoggydog
9-13-06
Wow, dad!
What are you "wow"-ing about, son?
That horse over there is really HUNG, dad!
I can see that, son!
(Five hours later...)
Wow!
Wow!

 

by edoggydog
9-14-06
Hey... Did you here that biped is dead?
Groovy!
I tell you biped is dead, and you say, "groovy"? Huh?
Our chance of actually winning one of these effing CC's has gone up exponentially!
Oh, yeah! Cooooooooool...
I better go tell Fred that biped is dead. Then, I'll meet Shiva in the shed to get some head, collapse on the bed, and eat 'til we're fed at the Denny's in Merced. Hope they serve sweet bread!

 

by edoggydog
9-14-06
Wow!
Hey, dad... Check out the size of the COCK on that cock!
Wow!
That's just what I was thinking!
No wonder the hens are BOW-LEGGED!

 

by edoggydog
9-14-06
Hey, dad... How do I milk a cow?
Easy, son! Just grab a hold of it's TEAT and squeeeeeze!
Where's this so-called, "teat" located, dad?
In the rear of the animal, son!
Okay, Bossie... Time for milking!
*snort?*

 

by edoggydog
9-14-06
Hey, dad... I just got a text message from the mayor that Tom Cruise is being attacked by a psychotic Brooke Shields fan!
Give me minute, son! I'm right in the middle of whitening my teeth...
But, shouldn't we HURRY, dad?
You don't want me showing up at the crime scene with dingy teeth, do you son?
(Three hours later...)
Looks like we're TOO LATE, dad!Cruise is already DEAD, dad! If, only we had gotten here SOONER, dad!
Cruise, schmooze! What's important is that I look good for the news cameras, son!

 

by edoggydog
9-25-06
...and that's why I say Islam is a religion of peace, love and understanding.
Groovy!
Any questions?
Yes... I heard a quote that "Islam is to be spread by the sword". Is that true?
WHO WAS THIS INFIDEL? I MUST KILL ANYONE WHO MAKES SUCH A BLASPHEMOUS STATEMENT! TELL ME WHO IT WAS, OR YOU DIE, TOO!!
Peace, love and understanding? Whaaaaaaaaaaat?

 

by edoggydog
9-25-06
Hey, dad! I hear Iran wants to make their own nukes. So, I'm thinking of enlisting into the Marines in case we decide to invade...
Don't be silly, son! There's no way those ragheads could ever create a nuclear weapon. And, even if they could, they certainly wouldn't use it to bomb us!
======== Ka-BOOOOOOM!! ========
Whoopsie!

 

by edoggydog
9-30-06
Sure. I'll tell you what happened...
Groovy!
"I was over at Frank's house, and he kept insisting I have a cup of his steaming HOT, freshly-brewed, world's famous coffee..."
C'mon, Melty... Just one cup, and I'll leave you alone...
Seriously, dude... I'd like to, but it wouldn't be a good idea. Trust me!
"But, he kept harping on me! So, I finally lamented, and drank a cup of his world's famous, freshly-brewed coffee, which was STEAMING HOT..."
Whoopsie!
I told you so, jackball!

 

by edoggydog
10-05-06
Wanna know what has two thumbs and loves blowjobs?
Groovy!
ME!!
Oh, I'm sure that joke's been done a million times throughout stripcreator.com... Later, dude!
Joke? JOKE?? I do love blowjobs! Especially, by Asian ladyboys from Bangkok! Speaking of cock-banging... I could really go for a blowjob. Anyone? I promise I won't spooge in your...

 

by edoggydog
10-09-06
Hey, Jesus... How's it HANGING?
What?
*sigh*

 

by edoggydog
10-09-06
Say, Jesus...
Yes, Captain Obvious?
Can you lend me a fifty until payday?
But, you don't even WORK!
I know. I was talking about your payday...
*sigh*

 

by edoggydog
10-11-06
Hey, Jesus...
Yes, Captain Obvious?
I hear surf's up. What say we grab our boards and go "HANG ten"?
*sigh*
I'll take that as a "no". I'll see you later... HANG loose, dude!
*SIGH!*

 

by edoggydog
10-11-06
Hey, Jesus...
ZZZZZZZZ- [*snort*] Huh? Oh. What is it NOW, Captain Obvious?
I'm sorry... Were you sleeping?
Yesssss!
Well, now that you're AWAKE, would you like to take a sleeping pill? I know how tired you've been lately...
SIGH!!

Showing page 17.

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