All comics by DippedInPoop

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by DippedInPoop
4-11-03
KEVIN: This year's vacation's gonna go smoothly, I can feel it... UGH.. GODDAMN FULLER.
BUZZ: I wouldn't let you sleep with me even if you were growing on my ass. TROUT SNIFFER.
FULLER: I can't wait to turn the plastic sheets into my own personal slip n' slide
FULLER!!!!! GO EASY ON THE PEPSI!!
JEFF: No one remembers me, the obscure cousin! I WAS IN THE ADVENTURES OF PETE AND PETE FOR GOD'S SAKE!!
MITCH: Hi! My name's Mitch Murphy, I live across the street! Does that cat scratch? Is it neutered? Does it have a litterbox? Is it soft? Does it get good gas mileage?

 

by DippedInPoop
4-11-03
i'm just inches away from copping a feel.
fuck. caught redhanded..
LOL redhanded
what's so funny about the color of your hand? dipshit.

 

by DippedInPoop
4-11-03
I'm undressing you with my eyes.
weird, I still feel like I have clothes on.
You have the most beautiful eyes.
Thanks, but I'm blind.
You look horny.
. . .

 

by DippedInPoop
4-13-03
Dell Ads: 2001-2002; PRE-drug-charge
DUDE, YER GETTIN A DELL!!!!!!! uh oh, time to smoke up.
Dell Ads: 2003-2004; PRE-sex-scandal
being a Dell intern is soooo dope
yeah bro, we're fuckin cool as shit
Dell Ads 2005
WE MAKE DELLS AFFORDABLE FOR ANYONE!!!!!
OMG I'LL TRADE YOU SOME PUSSY FOR ONE

 

by DippedInPoop
4-14-03
I have to go to the bathroom AND I CAN'T GET THESE OFF.
WHO IS YOUR DADDY AND WHAT DOES HE DO
BOYS HAVE A PENIS GIRLS HAVE A VAGINA
YOU EAT OTHER PEOPLE'S LUNCHES!!?
IT'S A TUMOR, YOU'RE GONNA DIE ! ! ! !
IT'S NOT A TUMUH
MR. KIMBAL, ARE YOU ALRIGHT????
OUR MOM SAYS OUR DAD'S A REAL SEX MACHINE
OUR MOM SAYS OUR DAD'S A REAL SEX MACHINE

 

by DippedInPoop
4-17-03
i don't think you're supposed to be touching me there
it's alright, i'm not gay
oh, then i guess it's ok

 

by DippedInPoop
4-18-03
Yeah, so, my mom disowned me. She found out I'm a Cross-dresser.
*crickets*
You assholes.

 

by DippedInPoop
4-21-03
Hello Father.
Please..
Call me DADDY.

 

by DippedInPoop
4-23-03
um. no.
fuckin' Disney cruises..
no one ever wants to swab my poop deck.

 

by DippedInPoop
4-24-03
My nipples are hard.

 

by DippedInPoop
4-24-03
Dressed in this suit, I am transformed from your everyday friendly pedophile into a 4-star restaurant waitress.
Don't you mean "waiter"?
Yeah. My mind's a little foggy. I'm upset over my lost puppy.
...

 

by DippedInPoop
4-25-03
Look, I have arms.
WHAT LE FUCK. Pardon my French.
HOW DO YOU FOLD YOUR ARMS LIKE THAT
C'MON, YOU CAN DO EET
Wanna arm wrestle?
asshole

 

by DippedInPoop
4-25-03
it's shake n bake, and i helped!
stop staring at me, douchbag

 

by DippedInPoop
4-28-03
this is just too damn weird for me, sorry
how come
penguins aren't supposed to be gray.. fuckin weirdo.

 

by DippedInPoop
5-01-03
you know what commercial i love?
what
the one where the woman's like "Things are always better if you talk about them... even when it's BURNING FEMININE ITCH".
LOLZALOT... what's the commercial for?
why?
nevermind

 

by DippedInPoop
5-01-03
HORIZONTAL STRIPES MAKE ME LOOK FAT
i had to turn the background off, it was hurting my eyes
but i was starting to feel american
whatever, fatass

 

by DippedInPoop
5-02-03
I AM INVISIBLE MAN!
I AM INVISIBLE MAN!
well, shit.

 

by DippedInPoop
5-03-03
i can't believe i've already sweat-stained the pits of my lab coat! god damn it!
no, you didn't, honey.. i made it out of old pairs of your underwear
*GLEEFUL*

 

by DippedInPoop
5-04-03
i smell poop... did you poop in your pants?
no
i don't believe you, let me see
okay
*2 minutes later*
i thought you said you didn't poop in your pants?
i thought you meant today

 

by DippedInPoop
5-05-03
HIGH FIVE
HIGH FIVE
HIGH FIVE
shut the fuck up, that is sooo 80's

 

by DippedInPoop
5-05-03
hey, you remember Popples?
yeah
those were great
yeah, i always wanted an ugly piece of cloth that i could roll up into a ball whenever i wanted.

 

by DippedInPoop
5-06-03
THE GOD DAMNED TEACHER MADE ME STAY FOR DETENTION
why
because i got an answer wrong on my test
that's lame
yeah. she wanted to know the square root of seven, so i told her i wanted to know her mom. what's the big fucking deal?
what a tightass bitch

 

by DippedInPoop
5-06-03
why are you wearing 2 bras?
because, A + B = C
why don't you just wear one and then stuff it
oh, i didnt think of that

 

by DippedInPoop
5-06-03
LIEK OMG 4REALZ?
LIEK OMG 4REALZ?
LIEK OMG 4REALZ?

 

by DippedInPoop
5-06-03
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S NOT BUTTER
HEY, WHAT HAPPENED TO MY HAM SANDWICH
HAVE YOU SEEN KANGAROO JACK YET
I LOVE BADGERS
I'M GONNA STICK THIS SOMEWHERE, BRB
DON'T FORGET TO BRING ME BACK SOME KFC

 

by DippedInPoop
5-07-03
OMG I HAVE 11 TOES
NEVERMIND I COUNTED WRONG

 

by DippedInPoop
5-07-03
i think i forgot to brush my teeth this morning
you never see Grey Poupon commercials anymore, what the hell happened
hi honey
i'm going to go get my hair done, be back at 5
OMG THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE

 

by DippedInPoop
5-08-03
Have you ever met someone who has actually eaten at Dairy Queen?

 

by DippedInPoop
5-08-03
don't get testy unless it's with my testes
i'm more than your average cattle rancher
i can't wait until my hind legs grow back
Bill Cosby suddenly got to good to do Jello Pudding Pop commercials, that rich bitch
the "skort" is by far the best invention ever. i no longer have to decide between skirts and shorts!!
No, I'm sorry, it's the Moops.

 

by DippedInPoop
5-09-03
OMG IT'S BRYANT GUMBLE
I'M STEVE AUSTIN, GET READY TO RUMBLE
I MAKE TUNA, I'M THE BEE OF BUMBLE
I'M A STRIPPER BUT I'M STILL HUMBLE
KEEP YOUR LEG UP, I WONT GRUMBLE

 

by DippedInPoop
5-09-03
We tried contacting your birth parents, Timmy, but they want nothing to do with you. . . . . . . Why are you crying?
When it comes to 3 year old Daniel.... Barry, you are NOT the father. . . . . . Why are you crying?
Your wife left you for a rodeo bull. . . Why are you crying?

 

by DippedInPoop
5-09-03
hey, we have the same shoes!
that doesn't mean we're friends.
i'm telling

 

by DippedInPoop
5-10-03
What the hell was I thinking when I replaced the Ropers with Mr. Furley?

 

by DippedInPoop
5-10-03
The only bangs you ever get are from Supercuts
What the hell is that supposed to mean

 

by DippedInPoop
5-11-03
Yeah, so, Tom Brokaw and I are having an affair.
I call him Tom Buh-kaw in bed.

 

by DippedInPoop
5-11-03
WE GAVE THEM THE OL' SWITCHEROO
LOL I HATE THAT DAMN WORD
I FUCKED A MOUNTAIN GOAT
LOL

 

by DippedInPoop
5-11-03
OMG i can't believe you cheated on me!!!
yeah.. i did it all for the nookie!
yeah?!
the nookie!
yeah?!
so you can take dat cookie!!!!!!!!! LOL I ATE HIM!!

 

by DippedInPoop
5-11-03
i wrote you something
ooooooh!
i love you.... i love your smile, your voluptuous breasts, your short but swan-like neck..
...oh, and your penis.

 

by DippedInPoop
5-11-03
i think i left my lunchbox on the bus
why are you telling me this
because your panties were inside it

 

by DippedInPoop
5-13-03
I've noticed that all daytime television commercials consist of ads for medical assistant training courses, lawyers groups, shitty graphic design programs, 1-800-dentist, and debt specialists.
who cares.
I wish I had some job skills. No one will hire me now that I have this pesky Carpel Tunnel syndrome. I can't even brush my teeth properly anymore. I am going to sue someone.
I should make up some posters about this, but i can't afford it and I don't know any graphic design.
OMG JENNY JONES IS ON!!!!!111
RUDE JUDE IS GONNA HELP US VOTE ON WHOSE CHEST IS REAL AND WHOSE IS FAKE!!! THEN WE'RE DOING A PATERNITY TEST TO FIND OUT WHICH DOCTOR DID THE IMPLANTS.

 

by DippedInPoop
5-13-03
I WISH PEOPLE TALKED LIKE THEY TYPED
TYPOS NAD EVERYTHING
LOL I JUST SAID NAD
LOL

 

by DippedInPoop
5-14-03
I WAS IN THAT BAND
DINOSAUR JR.
LOL NOT REALLY
fucking idiot

 

by DippedInPoop
5-15-03
my birthday suit is wrinkled
LOLZALOT
help me cross the street
no

 

by DippedInPoop
5-16-03
i love american music
BUT I'M BRITISH
i know, you fucking suck
A STRAY ARM!!
i bet you didn't see that coming.

 

by DippedInPoop
5-16-03
i have geesebumps
it's 'goosebumps'
shut the fuck up
lolol
This conversation has sooooo made me want to listen to Flock of Seagulls

 

by DippedInPoop
5-18-03
i looooove watching football
dyke

 

by DippedInPoop
5-21-03
Hi! I'm Alex Trebek! Welcome back to Jeopardy! Ching, you take control of the game!
I'll take, "Well-Known Advertisement Jingles" for 500, Alex!
The answer: ...This is the amount of time Red Lobster has used their well-known jingle: "Red Lobster for the seafood lover in you!!!"
What is too fucking long, Alex.
Yes! Ching once again takes control of the game!
I'll take "Popular Beef Dishes" for 1000, Alex!

 

by DippedInPoop
5-22-03
george washington's teeth were wooden, right?
yeah
so were they brown or did he paint them white?
i dunno, that bitch never smiled
how come
i heard he had hemorrhoids

 

by DippedInPoop
5-25-03
LMFAO

 

by DippedInPoop
5-25-03
I'm torn..
I want nothing more than to kill Rodney Dangerfield.. but am I in the mood to begin an eternity with him? Hmm.
Later That Day...
Well, this was a shitty alternative.
wanna play poker while I drop some deuces?

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